Rating: 
Summary: Sublime
Review: OMG TROLL 2 = BEST MOVIE EVER!!!Troll 2 is more allusive that Finnegans Wake, more profound than Beckett's "Trilogy", and is so eminently deconstructable that it should be required viewing for all students of Derrida.
Rating:
Summary: Wow... So bad it's good
Review: So, my cousin bought this movie at Bestbuy for 7 bucks because it looked so bad. Don't even watch troll 1 because it's just stupid but Troll 2... Has to be one of the GREATEST movies of all time. It is SO bad. The acting is absolutly terrible, the makeup was awfull, there weren't even any trolls, they were "goblins" which were stupid people in stupid costumes. Also, you can see the people reading off the script like the mother. Anyway, just get this movie, and then show it to everyone you know. Again, THIS IS SO BAD IT IS GOOD!
Rating:
Summary: Would you like some, Joshua?
Review: Something indefinable has moved me to write this review. I don't understand and can't explain what this movie has done and is still doing to me. Words cannot convey this sense of foreboding I feel in the pit of my stomach. What is happening to me? I guess I should give you some background as to what I'm rambling about. I purchased Troll/Troll 2 for the sole purpose of owning Troll 1. I had no idea what Troll 2 was or what it would eventually do to me. You see, I had seen Troll 1 when I was around 5-7 years old and had relatively fond memories of it, so when I saw the DVD for sale I snatched it up. The strangest sensation overtook me then. A cross between nervousness and uneasy trepidation, which for those that don't know, feels like knots and razors in your stomach while your skin breaks into a cold sweat. The feeling soon passed and I quickly forgot about it. Later that day I watched Troll 1 expecting to relive a bit of my childhood. Well, the saying "you can never go home" held true for me. I found Troll 1 to be an unforgettably, forgettable movie if that makes any sense, completely disposable and not worth mentioning beyond this point. I watched Troll 2 the next day. My expectations were low, but I figured I might as well give the second movie a chance. My life would be infinitely better had I washed my hands of the whole affair and turned my attention towards other pursuits, or maybe not. Who's to say? Where would the world be if there had been no Bubonic Plague or if the members of the Beatles had never formed a band? My soul cries out for a "what could have been" but without the Bubonic plague mightn't the world be burdened by overpopulation and pollution? Would we have been able produce someone whose intellect would dwarf Einstein's? Would some other band have been able to garner the recognition they deserved in the void left by the Beatles or would they create what in hindsight would be considered puerile drivel? These are pointless questions that can never be answered. Time to get down to brass tacks. I cannot stop watching Troll 2. I have alienated friends and family members. I have become an outcast in my neighborhood and have been shunned by co-workers. What is worse, as each day passes I find it harder to disassociate myself from this film. My waking thoughts are centered around it. My being has become enmeshed with its life force, and make no mistake it is alive. It grows stronger with each viewing. I see that there is no turning back. I have gotten to the point where I feel no remorse showing this film to others, addicting them, changing them, tailoring them, so that they may spread the Gospel that is Troll 2. I realize now that this is not just weird gibberish that I'm spouting off, it's not cathartic or.... My God, I am slowly going insane and I do not fear the outcome. I feel the re-assuring hand on my shoulder. Please watch Troll 2, you will be surprised at what gifts it has to offer you.
Rating:
Summary: Truly terrifying
Review: These movies both scared the life out of me. I'm not kidding. I consider myself somewhat of a horror fan (love Child's Play, Leprechaun, Legend of Boggy Creek), but I was totally unprepared for what these movies both had to offer. Troll 1 is alone worth the price of admission, and features such stars as Sonny Bono and Julia Louis Dreyfus. Troll 2 goes more for the jugular, and the sheer adrenaline rush. I put Troll 2 on whenever I'm studying for finals - because after I see it, I can't sleep for about four days!
Rating: 
Summary: Troll 2: The Stupidest Sequel Ever!
Review: This cinematic duo makes for great entertainment for different reasons. "Troll", made in 1986, is a story of troll infestation in an urban apartment building revolving around a family who has just moved in. This is a fun, yet campy, little movie with a couple of surprises that, while not totally unexpected, are still generally well done. The supporting cast in this film is wonderful, with special mentions going to Sonny Bono playing a hip swinging single (he has wonderful dialogue), Julia Louis-Dreyfus in an early role, and Gary Sandy (Andy Travis from "WKRP") as an amusing former Marine. The film is a typical mid-eighties PG-13 shocker, with no real gore, but a little excess grossness. Overall, for its genre, a good flick and fun to watch. The real treasure of the DVD, though, is, by far, "Troll 2", which actually does not involve trolls, but goblins. This movie is easily the worst sequel in memory. It has an awful, incoherent script, completely moronic 'plot', terrible acting, and characters actually made of cliches. This film is a treasure, and is like watching the modern invocation of Ed Wood, the muse of bad movies. Special bonus points for the secret weapon employed against the goblins! Bad movie lovers do not miss this one! Four stars overall: "Troll" gets three stars for being an average scary movie; "Troll 2" easily earns five stars for incredible stupidity on every level. Don't miss it!
Rating:
Summary: Troll 2: The Stupidest Sequel Ever!
Review: This cinematic duo makes for great entertainment for different reasons. "Troll", made in 1986, is a story of troll infestation in an urban apartment building revolving around a family who has just moved in. This is a fun, yet campy, little movie with a couple of surprises that, while not totally unexpected, are still generally well done. The supporting cast in this film is wonderful, with special mentions going to Sonny Bono playing a hip swinging single (he has wonderful dialogue), Julia Louis-Dreyfus in an early role, and Gary Sandy (Andy Travis from "WKRP") as an amusing former Marine. The film is a typical mid-eighties PG-13 shocker, with no real gore, but a little excess grossness. Overall, for its genre, a good flick and fun to watch. The real treasure of the DVD, though, is, by far, "Troll 2", which actually does not involve trolls, but goblins. This movie is easily the worst sequel in memory. It has an awful, incoherent script, completely moronic 'plot', terrible acting, and characters actually made of cliches. This film is a treasure, and is like watching the modern invocation of Ed Wood, the muse of bad movies. Special bonus points for the secret weapon employed against the goblins! Bad movie lovers do not miss this one! Four stars overall: "Troll" gets three stars for being an average scary movie; "Troll 2" easily earns five stars for incredible stupidity on every level. Don't miss it!
Rating:
Summary: Sing That Song I Like So Much!
Review: This DVD is one of those double feature presentations that studios use to bundle together a couple of clunkers in order to make a fast buck. "Troll" is the story of the Potter family and the wacky adventures they experience when they move into a new apartment building. Harry Potter and his wife Anne (played by a spacey Michael Moriarty and Shelley Hack, respectively), along with their two children Wendy and Harry soon discover an odd assortment of characters living in the building, including Sonny Bono as a wild swinger with an extreme dislike for children, Gary Sandy (Andy Travis from "WKRP"!) as a macho ex-marine with a suspicion for book lovers and liberals, and June Lockhart as a mysterious lady living on the top floor of the building. Brad Hall and Julia Louis-Dreyfus, recovering from their disastrous stint on "Saturday Night Live," turn up as a smoochy young couple. It isn't too long before Wendy Potter discovers a troll in the basement of the apartment building, and from that point forward "Troll" is a wild, wacky, and enormously cheesy excursion into fantasyland. It turns out that the troll is trying to recreate a fairy dimension within the confines of the building in order to start a war against humanity. Oh, the madcap wackiness of "Troll"! The scenes with Julia Louis-Dreyfus frolicking with the troll should provide all the convincing you'll need to watch this objet d'art. The real treasure on this disc is the inclusion of "Troll 2." I first saw this movie on video back in 1998 or 1999, and my enthusiasm for the film reached a fever pitch when I learned it would soon arrive on DVD. B movie fans should note that none other than trash director Joe D'Amato directed this tremendously terrible film. "Troll 2" is so bad in EVERY aspect that it ranks as the greatest "worst" movie ever made. People will tell you there are plenty of other films worse than this one, but believe me when I tell you that D'Amato's efforts here trump every other contender. The script, the effects, the acting, the editing; everything is so marvelously, deliriously, deliciously awful that this movie sends me into paroxysms of joy every time I watch it. Viewing "Troll 2" makes you doubt your very conceptions of what a bad film means: did the people who made this film deliberately set out to create a nightmare of these proportions, or was it merely accidental? We'll never know, but every minute of this movie is sheer delight for lovers of yuck cinema. Goodness, where do I start? Well, "Troll 2" tells the story about a family moving to the village of Nilbog where they encounter a town full of goblins (no trolls here, sorry) led by a wacky queen who wishes to turn the visitors into goblin food. That's the plot in a nutshell, and I won't spend more time on it because I really want to discuss other aspects of the film. You haven't lived until you have seen the people playing the characters in this movie. First, the hero of the film is Joshua, performed with screeching abrasiveness by Michael Stephenson. Accompanying Joshua to Nilbog is his dull father Michael, his hilariously wacked out Mom Diana, older sister Holly, her boyfriend Elliot, and the ghost of his grandpa Seth. Folks, you just can't imagine how bad the acting is here! The Mom speaks sentences that make little sense because the emphasis of the words is completely wrong. Holly, played by Connie McFarland, deserves a special place in our hearts with her performance. That dance she does in front of the mirror! Her lines of dialogue delivered with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer! Grandpa Seth is not only a scream; he keeps flashing a sinister smile throughout the film that should creep anyone out. The townspeople of Nilbog also deserve a special mention, especially the guy playing Sheriff Gene Freak (!). His best line: "Otherwise, we'll be forced to kill you violently!" I'm not even going to delve into the weird relationship between Elliot and his friends, or the outrageously over the top performance of Deborah Reed as the Queen of the Goblins. A thousand reviews would fail to convey the depths of badness "Troll 2" plumbs. You need to see it to believe it. The production values here are cosmically appalling. D'Amato regular Laura Gemser did the costume work for this film, and what a job she did. The goblins wear potato sacks and plastic masks that fit so loosely around the actors' heads that you can often see bare skin around the edges. In many scenes of the film, the editing is so poor that people look in the opposite direction of the person they talk to or react to things in completely unnatural ways. On one occasion, the Dad tells the family that there are no farmers on the streets of Nilbog because they are asleep for the evening, and it is broad daylight when he says it. By the way, did anyone else notice Joshua's skateboard magically reappears in his bedroom towards the end of the film? Yep, Ed Wood quality editing here, folks. Who knew we would see such an overtly atrocious picture as late as 1991? "Troll 2" is pure magic and truly deserving of a five star ranking. I absolutely adore MGM for releasing this on DVD with such a good transfer along with a "Troll 2" trailer. What this movie really needs is a commentary track with the actors who played Joshua, Holly, Diana, Michael, Elliot, and Grandpa Seth. Hearing what these guys would say about the film would be a dream come true for this B movie fan, and I would have paid double the price if such a commentary came with the DVD.
Rating:
Summary: ITS SO STUPID ITS GREAT
Review: tHIS IS A VERY FUNNY MOVIE. THE ACTING SUCKS THE MAKE UP IS CHEEP MASKS THEY HAVE PILLOWS IN THERE SOMACTHS. iTS SO GREAT. I DON'T CARE IF IT WAS RATED THE WORST MOVIE OF ALL TIME. BUY THIS MOVIE....
Rating:
Summary: The best worst movie ever!
Review: Troll 2 was a movie so poorly done and the acting was so awful that you actually have to watch it. You will laugh out loud when you see what I am talking about. Worth its weight in gold.
Rating:
Summary: Grandpa Seth!!
Review: Troll II is the landmark of American Cinema. By far the worst (and this is intentional, I believe) acting I have ever witnessed.
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