Rating: Summary: This movie just sreams originality.. Review: Ok, so I lied. This movie is a "painful" film with an unbelievable plot and too many plot holes to point a stick at. The performances are dismal, and the actors hardly look as though they were remotely interested in their characters. Although "Jamie Blanks'" previous attempt 'Urban Legends' was not a box office breaker, at least some of the ideas worked. This film has poor dialogue and generates no sense of atmosphere for the viewer. Personally, I would rather stare at my eye lids.
Rating: Summary: Who puts money in this? Review: After Valentine, Jamie Blanks would have to be considered one of the worst directors working at the moment. And coming from Australia, he's doing great damage to the country's growing film industry. First Urban Legend, mediocre at best, now he's (...) Valentine into existance. You might know some actors in this film, I'll save them the shame of mentioning them because you'll never see them again after this film. A geek is tormented at school by 5 girls and they won't dance with him. BOO HOO! Anyway he does his block and is shipped off to the nut house for the next 15. Despite being 9-10 when this happened the girls stay friends, yes all five, never losing contact, until they star getting knocked off by some hooligan (guess who?) in a Valentine mask. Now Blanks could have tried to scare but he's employed every tired directorial technique making it obvious where the killer would be and what action he'd take. Oh look we're in a mortuary, maybe he's hiding in a body bag? This film seems to be filmed inside a bubble (streets are bare, on one else seems to exist) Hello cheap porn look, which combined with terrible acting, make most scenes look daytime soap. Blank's seemed intent on taking this seriously, when he may have saved the movie if the girls got nude. And it could have been justified in the campy horror/slasher/nudity take. Thus distracting us from the rest of the film. No matter what, this is studio driven trash, fronted by a few pretty girls (and a few not so pretty) and helmed by a director who'll do what he's told. Although Blanks can't take all the credit, someone had to write this trash and I'm sure he's happy to have friends to take the heat.
Rating: Summary: Grate Movie Review: Listen to me people this is one of the best movies directed by jamie blanks.i know urban legend was hit to some people but i recon this is David Boreanaz debut.c'mon this is a good movie for people who like scary movies not for people who like lets just say the simpson's. this is full on. there r some realy good scenes. i recon this is a great cast but denise richard was a little off but hey i realy liked this movie so i say WATCH IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rating: Summary: A Entertaining Valentine's Day Review: "Valentine" is a movie that I really enjoyed. Why couldn't you like "Valentine". Let's see: it's scary, has a great cast of hot newcommers like Jessica Cauffiel, Marley Shelton, and Denise Richards, and it's a movie that you will enjoy. From the opening sequence to the bloodbath at the end, "Valentine" overall is one of my favoirte movies. My favoirte scene is Denise Richards when she's in the hot tub. I won't tell you the rest, just that I think you've seen Denise in "Wild Things" why not see her "Valentine". It was so good I bought it on video and on DVD.
Rating: Summary: Excruciating Review: Brilliant as 'Scream' was, look what it did to our nice teen movie market industry! First there was 'Urban Legend', now there's this, which is much much worse. It remains a mystery to me why David Boreanaz, who was so good as Angelus on TV show 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer', wanted to branch out into movies with such an awful role. Furthermore, the teen actors are terrible. Denise Richards is so terrible in every movie that she's in that you begin to wonder whether the director was trying to be ironic. Still, her eyebrows reach new heights of acting in this film.The deaths are all spectacularly stupid and every cliché is employed to maximum use. So the question pops up again - is this a self-knowing, clever teen slasher flick? Maybe the director was aiming for this but he left out any actual scares or any of the black comedy that the 'Scream' movies were jam-packed with. Obviously every recent teen horror movie is going to be contrasted with 'Scream' and then it obviously can't compete. But this movie just has nothing likable about it, and the trailer even told us who the killer was anyway!
Rating: Summary: And I thought Urban Legend was bad Review: First off, if you're thinking about even renting this movie, I'm begging you NOT to. It is easily one of the top 5 worst movies of all-time. It starts off pretty interesting, but gets really boring after the first 20 minutes. 5 girls torture some poor nerd at a junior high dance and then 13 years later, they are full grown, arrogant, stuck up, snotty, spoiled, ugly women, who are being stalked "mysteriously" by someone in a really stupid looking mask. The worst part of this movie is that we are supposed to feel bad for the shallow characters being stalked, but in reality, I was cheering for the killer with the lame mask. The acting is so godawful and the characters are so unbelieveable. None of the girls are attractive (Denise Richards being the exception, who looks like she is tired of playing the Cold-hearted, man-hater, can we say typecast?) and are all so inadequate in their acting abilities that their characters aren't even fun to hate. The plot is so weak, and there are far too many "potential" killer set-ups that wouldn't fool even a 10 year old. There was a really interesting back story going on throughout the movie, which is COMPLETELY ignored and untold. By the ending, nothing is resolved and nothing is explained and a story that could have been good is completely abolished. Avoid Valentine at all costs. Go rent Halloween, and stop getting suckered into the Scream About Urban Legends Last Summer movies.
Rating: Summary: Valentine Review: I recently used my Valentine DVD and it's great. I was able to skip the scenes that I wanted and go directly to my favorite scenes. I also love the video that was porvided in the DVD and the behind the scenes. I guess the best reason is if your a David Boreanaz fan you'll want to get it.
Rating: Summary: Not A Sweet Valentine Review: This 2001 movie is not what it could've been. It would love to be a classic holiday slasher film like "Halloween", but it will never amount to anything like that. Five girlfriends horribly embarras a poor geeky kid years ago in school. Now, the girls are all grown up and are all still friends. Naturally, their all hot babes too. What a shocker!. Anyways, a cherub masked killer shows up and starts knocking each one off one by one. Is it the poor kid they tormented in school?. Is it somebody else?. I think the answer is pretty obvious right from the start. I can't imagine anyone not figuring it out. It has all the deep mystery of a Scooby Doo cartoon. Besides it's faults, there are some good points this movie has. The first one, is the women. Their all lovely to look at. The second is the producers' attempt to make the characters more grown up. Out of high school and actual career business women in the real world. The opening sequence however, is quite nice. It's a shame that David Boreanaz from "Angel" had to pick this as his first major film role. He's a good actor with incredible presence and that should've been used in a much better film debut. Some of the kills are quite fun if you like that sort of thing. The ending is definitley no surprise. Trust me. Director Jamie Blanks, as he's shown in his last film, the far superior and fun "Urban Legends", has a nice eye for detail.
Rating: Summary: This really is good- buy it! Review: Ok, I don't know where to start. This really is a great movie, it's got a stunning cast plus a good storyline which twists around a 90 minute movie filled with gruesome deaths. Obviously, Denise Richards is one character I won't be forgetting and her portayal as "Paige" really made me feel sorry for her when she met the killer at the end of the movie. All the characters are played by good actors and I would love to see a sequel. Jamie Blanks also produced another amazing horror film "Urban Legends" and "Valentine" is another thriller where you'll jump from your seat a few times. The extras on the DVD aren't great but the movie is v.good so buy it. Believe me, the mask the killer wears is seriously freaky. And watch very carefully at the end of the movie when the killer is revealed, Jamie had a very clever ending that will leave you shocked and questioning whatever you were thinking throughout the whole movie. What are you waiting for, BUY IT?!
Rating: Summary: Great actresses but real crappy script Review: I rented this movie expecting something much more then I got. Maybe I just wanted to see it because of its female cast, or I expected another scream, but there were so many things wrong with this script. First comes the part when Shelly runs from the killer and into the morgue, then hides in a BODY BAG. Predictable and forshadowing about what will happen to her in the next moment. Next, when Lilly dies after being shot with three arrows and falling from a balcony into a dumpster, no ever knows she's dead but the killer. Then comes the part when people who had nothing to do with Jeremy in the sixth grade start getting killed(like Dorothy's boyfriend and Kate's crossdressing neighbor), which proves that the killer is in fact NOT Jeremy. And when exactly did the detective get beheaded and have his severed head thrown in the fountain? Finally, the worst part was when the killer is shot dead before the mask is removed, so you have no idea what the motives were, and when Kate and Adam hug and nosebleed, the blood comes out at an awkward angle, displaying a poor job on special effects. Now the film is not atrocious like I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, so it could be worth watching more than once, and any red-blooded male can dig Denise Richards, maybe more so than Jennifer Love Hewitt, but good-looking actresses cannot save the film when it is poorly written. Hell, I think I could have written a better script and storyline. I'm also real bored with all this "nu-metal" that dominates the soundtrack. (I Think) the underground of extreme metal features much more skill, but the general public hates it and when the script is already meant for the paper shredder, a bunch of uncommercial death and black metal will not get the film the audience that Hollywood craves.
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