Rating: 
Summary: Good at least for what it was. Underrated.
Review: The plot of this movie and many of the plot elements in it are pretty much patently absurd, although this doesn't make the movie totally horrible. Often movies get a horrible review because they have a thin plot and aren't 'good' in essence.The idea is that the family moves into this house and there are ghosts in it, etc.... The igniting event that sets off the whole plot never really made any sense to me, but past that it's pretty clever. The only fundamental flaws with this movie(implausiblity aside) are that they never really explain how or why the ghosts get released, and secondly, they never explain how the device in the guy's house works and what it's for. Either way, it's a fun movie to watch.
Rating:
Summary: Not enough Ghosts?
Review: I was really disapointed in this movie..The story itself was strange and frankly Hokey. The few flashes you get of some pretty disturbing Ghosts...Is not enought to hold your interest. Dont bother..
Rating: 
Summary: WOW!
Review: Amazing! Spectacular! Stupendous! Superb! SIMPLY PHENOMENAL!
It's extraordinary! ..that this movie was ever even contemplated by a human being with more than 4 brain cells to spare. I mean c'mon; how low are they going to sink with these idiotic new age piles of dung? Think about this.. Was there a single character in there that was even remotely creative? Were any of them *actually* scary? Does Shannon Elizabeth have any similarity to Tony Shalhoub? They didn't go overboard with this movie - more like they went under the desk (you know what I mean) to get any producer to accept the title as worthy of being viewed by people that aren't blind and deaf. "That's all I have to say about that." -Forrest Gump
Rating:
Summary: AHHHHHH! I HATE IT WHEN THEY DO THAT!
Review: You certainly have to admire the ambition behind "Thirteen Ghosts," especially for people who were inspired by the legacy of William Castle. The legendary schlock meister was famous for making movies using a single set and pretty much no matter what story they came up with for this updated version of the 1960 film where you had to wear the special glasses to see the ghosts in the movie it was not going to be as impressive as this set. In creating the home of Cyrus Kriticos (F. Murray Abraham), Production Designer Sean Hargreaves, Art Director Don Macaulay, and Set Decorator Dominique Fauquet-Lemaitre came up with something innovative and visually stunning. It is a good thing that the characters go on a tour of the house because the audience is sitting there checking out the place too and not paying attention to what anybody is saying. When you think of all the low-budget horror films that had great stories but minimum productive values and you see how the makers of "Thirteen Ghosts" have squandered the opportunity afforded by this fantastic set, I have to agree with one of the characters and screen very loudly (like the sound level on this film) "AHHHHHH! I HATE IT WHEN THEY DO THAT!" "Thirteen Ghosts" (a.k.a. "Thir13en Ghosts") is one of those movies where it might have worked better if the exposition came in the prologue of the film. We learn that this wonderful set is not a house but a machine ("designed by the devil and powered by the dead"), which means all the whirling gears, the sliding glass panels, and the spinning circles on the floor, all have significant meanings. But we do not learn this until about halfway through the film, by which point you are not really in a position to retroactively go back and make sense of what we have already seen. I appreciated the film a lot more the second time around, but second viewings are supposed to be to explore the depth of a film and not to figure out what was really going on in the first place. The set is awesome and the ghosts are suitably gruesome, but the story and the characters are not up to the challenge. I am serious when I say that if you go set the audio track from English to something you do not speak (your choice) that your comprehension of the film would not seriously suffer. The look of this film is spectacular, an absolute visual treat and I can only imagine what it was like for the cast and crew when they first arrived on the set. But with all the time and effort spent on the set and makeup, paying equal attention the story (rather than the volume level) could have made this a landmark horror film. The DVD extras are sparse but decent. The commentary shows that the people behind the camera were very much enamored with the giant toy they had constructed and the ghosts they had running around. We also get the back-stories on the 12 ghosts, narrated by the man who should know, Cyrus Kriticos. This helps to reinforce the problem of the film in terms of understanding what is going on, because here are all this semi-developed back-stories that are barely touched upon in the film. Ironically, I think with the backstories this script could be turned into a pretty good horror novel.
Rating: 
Summary: Big Disappointment
Review: Often I like movies, particularly horror movies, that most others did not like. This was the case for example with "Ghost Ship" and "The House on Haunted Hill", two other remakes by the Dark Castle Production Company. I was therefore quite disappointed at just how bad Thirteen Ghosts was. Thirteen Ghosts is a remake of a William Castle picture by the same title. The plot (such that it is) centers around a widower's family who inherits a haunted house. The house is haunted by the ghosts of thirteen tortured souls that were collected by the previous owner. The ghosts are kept in place by a series of spells that create a barrier that they can't cross. The catch is that these spells are written on the glass walls of the house. The position of the walls is constantly changed by a series of moving gears within the house, thus changing the boundaries by which the ghosts are held. The ghosts, which can only be seen by special glasses, are quite scary looking. They remind me of Clive Barker's "Tortured Souls" figures. Unfortunately the ghost visuals can not save the movie from poor dialog, lack of plot, and uninteresting characters. There are several scenes that will make you jump, and the gore factor is fairly high, but I would not say the movie is particularly scary. After a while it just gets tedious. Even the most hard core horror fan will likely be disappointed by this flick.
Rating:
Summary: INTERESTING, BUT FAR FROM SCARY!
Review: Promising chills galore, "Thirteen Ghosts" proves to be anything but scary. The premise is cool, and the actors turn in fine performances (and Shannon Elizabeth is just soooooooo hot), but the chill factor is just unable to come through. The makeup and visuals are impressive, but not scary. I just don't see anything scary about a naked princess chick (yeah, the actress who played her looks great, but the makeup just ruined it.). It just goes to show you that everyone thinks that blood and gore is scary. But, after the success of films like "Signs," "The Blair Witch Project," and "The Sixth Sense," Hollywood should realize that graphic violence isn't that scary anymore. It may have worked for "Halloween" and "Nightmare on Elm Street," but those films are classics. Time for Hollywood to turn out more "True" scary films. This is a good film, but if you're looking for a "scary" film, check out the aformentioned films above.
Movie Grade: C
DVD Grade: C
Rating:
Summary: Eye candy, nothing else, really.
Review: When I say "eye candy," I'm not neccessarily referring to the movie's star, Shannon Elizabeth. I am talking about the dazzling visual effects, the detailed make-up on the ghosts, and the very creative killings (always appreciated). All of these things, however, cannot make a movie, which Thirteen Ghosts proves. The plot is simply not there -- wait, let me rephrase -- there is a plot. But it is so corny and cliched, that anyone who has seen a handful of movies can tell exactly where it is heading. Also, the characters are annoying, most noteably the nanny, who spouts off typical and corny "crazy white people" lines like she was the female Martin Lawrence. The kid is annoying. I did appreciate Tony Shalhoub, and Shannon Elizabeth is always nice to look at. Also, like I mentioned before, this film looks gorgeous. The first viewing, my eyes were glued to the screen. However, the movie doesn't offer much else. I own it on tape and have only watched it one and a half times. It's a little too boring for what it's trying to do. Think of it as a bad cross between The Amityville Horrors and Nightmare on Elm Street.
Rating: 
Summary: GOTTA LOVE THIS MOVIE.
Review: IF U HAVENT SEEN THIS MOVIE THEN U SHOULD GO AND SEE IT. ITS BETTA THAN ANY SCREAM MOVIES I'VE EVER SEEN. IF U LIKE SCAREY MOVIES THEN THIS MOVIE IS FOR U. IF U DONT HAVE IT THEN U NEED TO GO OUT AND COP THIS JOINT. THIS IS ONE MOVIE U HAVE AND A MUST C.
Rating: 
Summary: What's Really THAT bad about this movie?
Review: I don't know why people are saying that this is such a horrible movie. It wasn't that bad, I guess it was a little far fetched, but look at some other big movies these days. It's a horror film, their usually all the same, and the killer never dies. Look at Halloween for example, will he ever die? And these killers are already dead! It was scary and when I see it, it still is sometimes scary. I thought it deserves 3 and a half stars, but the rating doesn't have that, so I gave it 4.
Rating:
Summary: Basements beware
Review: An extremely rich, yet mischievously evil 57-year-old man just died. He decides to leave his mansion to his nephew and his family. The proud new owners of this towering mansion that looks like a glass lover's dream come true, could go from worrying about how to pay all the bills to having no worries at all. But wait! If something seems like it's too good to be true, it usually is. They don't know it yet, but this mansion is terrifyingly haunted. There are several dead, ghostly spirits that reside in the building's basement that are dying to be released. The family soon finds out that their lives are in great danger. They must figure out a way to escape from this place with a heart that still beats. But how? How in the world is it possible? I have an older brother that swears that "Thirteen Ghosts" is the best movie he's ever seen. Horror movies are his favorite genre of films, and he says that unlike most of them, this one is actually scary. I agree with the latter. Whether it's the dead, bloody bodies of the ghosts flashing before your eyes like lightning, or the idea that somebody might die in a few seconds, "Thirteen Ghosts" succeeds at being fairly scary. If you own a basement, you might not want to venture to that underground room that you frequently run to when a tornado is in town, for awhile. Unfortunately, that (being scary) and its convincing special effects is about all that "Thirteen Ghosts" succeeds at. The acting is a bit subpar, and the movie is way too predictable. Also, it's fun to watch the movie for awhile, but before it's over (even though it's real short at less than 90 minutes), it grows old. While I enjoyed the film much better than "House on Haunted Hill", it doesn't stand up to such horror greats as "The Haunting", "Pet Sematary", or "Poltergeist". It's easy to see that "Thirteen Ghosts" strikes a major chord for some, but not for the majority. I recommend either renting it or watching it on TV before you buy it to see which side of the fence you're on when it comes to "Thirteen Ghosts".
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