Rating: Summary: Should've been called Thirteen HOURS... Review: ... because that's how long it'll feel like as you wait for this boring, convoluted, brain-dead piece of (...) to end! Scary? Yeah, right. It's not even a horror movie. Just a bunch of special effects injected around a nonsense plot. The farther the movie progresses (regresses) the worse the story gets and the special effects are just flashbulb-popping botch jobs that'd induce an epileptic into seizures.Bet you didn't know this was produced by tinseltown heavyweights Joel Silver and Robert Zemeckis, did you? Notice they're doing everything they can to disassociate themselves from this garbage. Hollywood produced some real (...) this year, but even Bones was at least a watchable movie until it's ridiculous ending. This movie is just awful from beginning to end. Thir13en Ghosts (even the name is stupid) gets my vote as the worst movie of 2001 - and one of the worst movies ever made.
Rating: Summary: Holy Mother of Merciful (...)!!! Review: Dude, that one scene when that lady with the box on her head was all "WAAAAAAHHHHHH!" And that chick from American Pie was all "WAAAAAAHHHHHH!" And then the taxi driver from Wings was all like "I gotta find my kid!" Awesome, dude. But that big fat guy with the midget lady? Man, that was just creepy.
Rating: Summary: A Classic Disappointment Review: I am a great fan of classic horror. Not nonsense where 80% of the cast dies in some horrid and grisly way, but true spinetingly, psychologically frightening film. Frankly, this film appalled me because it never really accomplished anything except an exceptional show of special effects. The villain in the story appears to be a madman bent on opening the Eye of Hell to aquire great power (the fact that he will ruin the entire world doesn't seem to matter much.) He has created an exquisite house designed to trap and hold thirteen ghosts. Each ghost has to meet certain requirements in order to provide said villain with the powers to open the gate. Needless to say, the ghosts are all unique and interesting make-up jobs and though they sometimes chase after and horrify the house's human occupants (the villain's widowed nephew, a housekeeper, and the nephew's two children,) they rarely ever interact with them. The bulk of the film consists of the chracters getting seperated and lost in the house as the ghosts are wandering about. Accompanied by a young psychic man who helped trap the ghosts to begin with and wants to help the family (in my opinion the only redeeming feature of the movie as he seems the most developed character) the family eventually discovers and defeats the crazed uncle's diabolical plans through a little luck and the power of love beyond the grave. The problem with this film is that the plot lacks real substance. At the end one is left wondering what the whole point of the film is. The storyline, at best, is weak, lacking detail and interest. Consequently, it was difficult for me to find this film genuinely frightening or even disturbing because it just never tells a coherent story, much less a frightening one. Save your money--and your time.
Rating: Summary: Great Addition for Horror Fans Review: I found this movie made me jump on more than one occasion which has not been the case in some of the newer horror movies lately. If your a fan of horror and love being scared I definately recommend this film.
Rating: Summary: Ho-Hum Review: How can I put this...Oh yeah don't waste your money! What you can expect from this movie is the same thing you expect out of most horror films...a big yawn! I love to watch a truly scary movie and ghost just happen to be my favorite scary topic; but this movie just didn't cut it. If anything it made me wish I hadn't eaten my dinner before I went. I will admit that the movie did get a rise out of me once, but in general I slept pretty well that night...trust me that's not a good sign! If you are looking for a truly scary ghost story I would recommend you see "The other" staring Nicole Kidman.
Rating: Summary: Thirteen Pieces of (...) Review: Another swing and a miss from the people who brought us the dismal House on Haunted Hill. Man with an unexplained wealth of capital resources hunts and captures spectres a la Ghost Busters. Untimely demise results in estate being left to poor relatives. The ghosts, for as little as they are on screen and as little as we learn of them, are much more human than the poorly written cast, except for Matthew Lillard who is great as usual. Tony Shalhoub as the father isn't even as half as compelling as he was in Galaxy Quest; Shannon Elizabeth is miscast as his daughter; and I prayed for the quick demise of Shalhoub's movie son, the annoying and forgettable Alec Roberts (nice stage name, btw), but unfortunately he survives until the end. Hard to believe because his character acts so (...) the ghosts would have killed him in two seconds. We are also treated to a stereotypical 'nannie' character, which doesn't make sense; isn't this a family on the edge of poverty? Anyway, two interesting killings, one in the opening junkyard scene and one soon after the family take possession of the house, promise greatness that is never realized. 13 Ghosts is a lot of eye candy with no coherent story built around it; the ghosts behave inconsistently as do most of the characters. Plot twists are never explained, and the most interesting characters, the ghosts, are hardly onscreen at all, with the exception of the gratuitous, buxom, topless ghost. She really advanced the plot. The finale is reminiscent of X-men, with a little Contact thrown in for good measure. But it is a remake, so why be ashamed to borrow interesting visuals from other movies. This movie is typical Hollywood (...), I give it a rating of 'Not So Money' on a scale of 'Hurting' to 'Bazilly'. It WAS better than 'Jeepers Creepers' though. The only reason I saw it is because the showtime was earlier than 'From Hell'.
Rating: Summary: The Cube revisited... Review: I really did enjoy 13 Ghosts, but it seemed highly based on the independent film "The Cube." It was nice to see a similar story brought into the realm of high-budget horror, but I think it would have been better done as an actual remake of Cube with big name actors. The movie on it's own is quite good. The suspense does sustain the entire movie, and I left the theater with bloodshot eyes from constantly keeping them open in suspense. The only disappointment was the lack of nudity as far as Shannon Elizabeth is concerned. I'm not a sexist, but it's become expected in a movie like this to see her nude. I think most of the characters are compelling, but you never really feel like you are inside of the main character. The people are a bit 2-dimensional. This film was highly entertaining, but lacked the depth to become a classic. If you are into real suspense, buy the movie Cube instead.
Rating: Summary: 13 GHOSTS Review: 13 GHOSTS is a high-voltage combination of horror, suspense, action, and humor. A man, his daughter, his son, and his maid inherit a house from his uncle Cyrus. The house is actually a gateway that was built in order to open a door to the underworld, and in the basement of the house are containment cages that hold 12 ghosts that will destroy anyone in there path. When the family enters the house, they become trapped inside with the dead spirits, and now with the help of a psychic and a ghost hunter, the family must try to find a way out.
Rating: Summary: good Review: This was a pretty good movie. The specail effect really do look great. The plt is passable, bearly adequete. The acting is good to O.K. Some of the plot doesn't make a bit of sense (That guy was dead! Wait he's alive?) but this an easy forgettable movie. I enjoyed being pretty scared throughout and also enjoyed Shannon Elizabeth. Despite what other people think, I think she is a great actress. Just because she plays a ditz in a couple movies (ok 3 or 4) doesn't mean she shouldn't get a chance in other movies. This was a good baby step away from the ditzy roles. (Jay and silent bob strikes back was another, kinda.) I hope she continues to make good movies because I really enjoy her and her acting. As for the movie, it is good except for one more problem. The movie is so loud and has so many sparks and flashes, you will probably have a head-ache at the end. The finally is extremely loud and bright. Shannon Elizabeth makes everything alright, though.
Rating: Summary: ...NOT scary... Review: This is just a typical movie with tons of gore and violent scenes. Is it scary? No. Is it violent? YES. Unfortunately though, this movie is also plagued with pathetic actions; the group, being chased by 12 'ghosts' split up and do pathetic things. Acting is decent, and the special effects are nicely done (if you can stand to look at REALLY gory stuff.) The addition of the family - ghost relationship is the only remarkable thing about this film.
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