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Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things

Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things

List Price: $9.99
Your Price: $9.99
Product Info Reviews

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Strange Stuff....
Review: On a deserted island that seems to be one big cemetery, Alan and his acting troupe are (God only knows WHY...) getting ready to dig up a little fun. Actually, they're digging up a corpse named Orville, to aid them in a Satanic ritual (Again, it's never explained WHY...). After spending a loooong time doing humilitiating things to poor dead Orville, Alan starts to read the ritual aloud, and the "Children" get a little more than they bargained for.....

This is strictly grade-Z stuff, so don't expect to see a Romero-level "Dead" epic. The acting is amateur-hour, ranging from tolerable to I-want-these-people-DEAD-sooner-rather-than-later (Alan & the shrill Anya). The first hour is interesting at times, but mostly laughable (Those loud hippie clothes!) and interminably sloooowwwwww. The last half-hour makes the film worth seeing, though, as the angry dead come to life to punish their defilers. Although the film is PG, with no strong language and no gore, director Bob Clark (Later to find fame as the Director of Porky's 1 & 2, Murder By Decree, and A Christmas Story) manages to make that last half-hour as creepy as hell. (A friend of mine is unable to even look at the box art because the film scared her so badly!) I wasn't scared, but I'll tell ya: That shot of Orville getting up off of the couch is really memorable....

The DVD comes with text Bios of Bob Clark and Alan Ormsby, an ad gallery, and what must be the greatest trailer ever made. The film transfer isn't so hot, but the low price point makes it acceptable. If you have low expectations, Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things might just be for you.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: One of My Personal Favorites - Zombies Chills + Some Humor
Review: I own multiple copies of every version of this film available on VHS, LD and DVD. VCI's version on VHS and DVD is the most complete version I've seen (running 87 minutes, 1 - 2 minutes longer than previous pre-records) AND it's letterboxed, and nicely packaged.

CSPwDT is one of those rare horror films that is truly terrifying. I've often tried to pinpoint exactly what frightens me the most about this film: the atmospheric, creepy setting; a remote, island cemetery where tufts of mist sweep across an eerie graveyard, or the weird electronic synth music with shrills and screeches, and human moaning in the background, or the incredible 'revival of the dead scenes' with some of the most effective make-up ever committed to celluloid, or the wild cinematography and lighting, ...

It all works together to create, in my opinion, an impossible-to-forget masterpiece. Reportedly the film cost $70,000 to make in 1972, but it has more scares and is more effective than any recent big-budget horror film that I can remember. I'd give it 6 stars if I could. Watch it tonight alone with the lights out!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Prefer cheese to splatter? Bite into this one!
Review: Yes, the acting ranges from poor to hilariously bad (although Valerie Mamches has a good moment or two), and yes, the dialog suggests that the script was ghostwritten (so to speak) by a couple of kids in a clubhouse after reading lots and lots of mouldering EC comix--but beyond that, it's a fine li'l film. The makeup was credible, and the sound effects were quite creative: I've never heard loons used to such disturbing effect.

But what makes this movie shine is the direction. The idiot kids time and again tempt fate, and the camera zooms in on what your experience with B-movies tells you will be the subject of explosive action...and nothing happens. Over and over, you're teased to the brink of jumping out of your seat and screaming, 'Enough! Just kill 'em already!' Imagine if a couple of teens were having sex in the woods in a 'Friday the 13th' movie, with the 'cha-cha-cha' soundtrack blaring and a hand-held camera's POV--then the sated kids got dressed and walked merrily away, hand-in-hand. Brilliant pacing redeems 'CSPWDT', condensing all the action into the final moments of the film.

The fact that nearly everyone who's seen this movie saw it on TV yet were still scared is solid evidence that this movie is a must-see for mature (i.e. patient and forgiving) fans of low-budget macabre. It's not Shakespeare--the title gives that away--but it's a terrific early effort by a talented director.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: See the Unexpected Terror of Rising...Rotten...Filmmaking!
Review: Don't listen to all the hype from the fanatics. The basic story line of this cheap "no-budget" zombie flick (a budget of only $70,000) is shamelessly lifted from George Romero's highly superior NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968) released a few years earlier. But wait! There is that old epigram that says plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery, right? Well, sure. But Romero can't possibly be flattered by CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS (1972). Even though the folks that exposed this strip of color celluloid in 1972 may have ripped the IDEA from Romero's black-and-white magnum opus, they certainly didn't do anything too flattering with it.

The movie follows a troupe of hammy hippie thespians as their director drags them off to a Florida island to act out a necromantic ritual. But even though they only PRETEND to raise the dead, the corpses in the island's cemetery don't realize it's only make-believe--the dead bodies crawl from their graves and start looking for human flesh to feed on. The acting troupe eventually gets trapped in an old house--this is a Romero rip-off, remember--as a swarm of pasty-faced zombies try to bust in and crash the party.

Aside from the stolen story ideas--which, by the way, are clumsily reworked--CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS is replete with abysmal acting, amateurish lighting, and even lousier cinematography. Many scenes that are meant to be frightening instead generate unintentional laughter simply because the actors are so inept and unconvincing. And often times it is hard to make out what is really happening on-screen because the lighting is too dark or the film improperly exposed.

That's not to say that the movie doesn't have a few good points. In spite of the low budget, some of the make-up jobs on the zombies are pretty cool. A few of the walking dead look hokey, but several of them look as if they stepped right off the pages of some old E.C. Comics. The sound design and sound FX are ably executed, too, providing a few genuine chills. And rotten writing and awful acting aside, the director does a pretty good job with what he has to work with. Most scenes are prudently tight, and the action is paced in a way that keeps things from getting too boring. (The good direction isn't too surprising when considering that director Bob "Benjamin" Clark will move on to helm much better films like the genre flick BLACK CHRISTMAS in 1974, teen favorite PORKY'S in 1982, and the popular Yuletide comedy A CHRISTMAS STORY in 1983.)

In short, CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS is a dull, poorly executed rip-off of a much better film. The overall movie gets a 1-star rating, while the make-up work, sound work, and the direction deserve, for the most part, 4 stars. The DVD from VCI isn't anything to write home about, though. Other than a (non-anamorphic) widescreen transfer of the uncut version, there are no real extras. For an excessively bad film like this, extras like behind-the-scenes featurettes or actor interviews are often more interesting and entertaining than the film proper and thus make the DVD worth the purchase--for non-fanatics, anyway. The DVD, therefore, gets 1 star. This means that the average rating for the CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS disc is 2 stars.

If you wanna watch truly scary--and sometimes deliberately funny--dead things, skip this film and get the George Romero DEAD trilogy instead.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Cult classic from the 70's back in stock!!!
Review: I could start my review with a review about the movie's plot, but I rather focus it on the movie itslef. I love this movie. It's so darn cheesy. The low-grade sound production, the dark grainy 35 MM transfer, the cheesy Scooby Doo-like "gang" and the obnoixious but hilarious Alan Orsby's performance, the simple Zombie make-up, not to mention the avant-garde atmosphere that is given thoughout the enitre movie, which really gives it a big effect and mood, and the amount of dark comedy added. No to mention a ironic ending, and over-acting... Many people complain about the old 35mm transfer, but I think it's just genius. To me, that was what "CSPWDT" was all about....the low budget and how they made a 70's cult classic comedy Zombie flick.And this really is comedy people, just look at the acting, mainly Alan Orsbys! He's obnoxious, horny, cocky, self-righteous, sarcastic, annoying...he's everything you would expect from a manager and director. Also the PG rating it got is too funny..sure there are some parts where it might startle you, but this is like a family version of a Zombie movie. No gore, no nudity, only a couple curse words, and a cheesy mock at doing a Satanic ritual...overall, this is the most family-safe Zombie movie I've ever seen! Heck, even kids can watch this! ... So go ahead... grab a few cold beers, a bowl full of chips, and just sit back and laugh!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: cheesy but worth watching!
Review: You take away the absence of production values, amature acting, bad dialouge and you got a pretty decent horror pic. That withstanding, Children Shouldnt Play with Dead Things is an underated zombie flick considering it was made with almost no budget. Why? Alan Ormsby gives one of the most annoying performances in B-movie history! Its only fitting that the viewer is treated to his death by the zombie he digs up and mocks! The zombie effects are surprisingly effective, creating some scary looking zombies that work to give a genuine creepiness about the film. A film worth watching for the horror fan.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Either you swear by it....or swear at it
Review: I first saw this movie on a late night horror show called "Chiller Theater" when I was about 12 or so back in 82 or 83. I remembered clearly the one zombie with the sport-coat and tie and imposssibly big mustache climbing out of the grave, which gave me chills then..and still does. Heck, I didn't remember this being a dark comedy back then, but it sure is.
You can look at this movie in two different ways: one being it is a cheesey, low-budget, poorly done film. Or 2: A bunch of college kids, seriously inspired by George Romero, who took a shoe-string budget and a lot of imagination and delivered a truly bizarre horror classic.
Sure, the dialog is pathetic and the Ormsby is very annoying in the lead role..but that's how he's supposed to come off. It's a 70's film and nothing more or nothing less. It's fun to watch and , at times, scary along the way.
The transfer of the film to dvd is just plain lousy. I doubt if any big companies like Universal, Fox, or even Anchor Bay would buy this and digitally remaster it but, let's hope they do.
This little gem of a movie is a classic and should get the respect it deserves. The sound on the film is ok at best. The video is horrendous: lots of drop-outs, many artifacts, and it looks like they got the worst possible film stock to transfer from.
So, if you are a hard-core zombie fan..this one should not be missed. If you are in the market for an all-out scream fest, you won't find it here. This is the perfect Late, Late, Late Show movie. I give it an all out A.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Good Low Budget Zombie Flick
Review: Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things is an oft-overlooked zombie classic from the early 1970's. Although it is a low budget effort and this sometimes shows with the effects and dialogue, it has plenty of creepy atmosphere to give anyone the chills. The plot involves a group of actors heading to an island (an island that contains a graveyard, of course) to raise the dead. At first, it seems as if nothing has happened until the dead really DO begin to rise to slaughter those who have intruded on their island. With some humor and quite a bit of atmospheric tension, this film is best enjoyed late at night in a darkened room preferably as a fog settles outside.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: the most underrated zombie flick of all time !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Review: A TRUE ZOMBIE BLUEPRINT!!!!!!this movie stands side by side with the GREAT ONES like romero's "NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD" & fulci's "ZOMBIE" its such a shame its not as recognized as the other 2 are!!!!????!!!!!THIS IS TRULY ONE OF MY VERY FAVORITE HORROR MOVIES!!!! YOU GET SOME DECENT ACTING/TRULY CREEPY WEIRD ATMOSPHERE & STORYLINE(very original)/SUPERB DIRECTING(bob clark is the mannnnn!!!)/WAY MORE SCARY THAN BLOODY(like romero's MASTERPIECE N.O.T.L.D.)/& THE ZOMBIES LOOK TRULY SCARY & REALISTIC FOR SUCH A LOW BUDGET!!!!!!/ the dvd comes out looking and sounding just fine for the budget & date!!! bottom line if your a true horror or zombie fan & you haven't caught this GEM of a TRUE horror flick then THIS ONES FOR YOU!!!!! SO TURN OUT THE LIGHTS,LOCK ALL THE DOORS,GET SOME POPCORN READY(somthing to keep reminding you that its just a movie),PLOP THE DVD IN,HOLD ON TIGHT & E!!!!N!!!!J!!!!O!!!!Y!!!!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Go! Zombies Go!
Review: I found myself cheering on the dead to hurry up and eat the infuriatingly annoying living, in this darkly humorous classic. Alan (Alan Ormsby) carries on like a steam-driven peacock in his attempts to terrify his acting students. This man pontificates and blithers his way through most of the movie! There has never been more wind caught on film! Alan must be endured to be believed. Taking them to a long-forgotten island cemetery, he sets up a fake ritual and even digs up a dead guy! Unfortunately for him (fortunately for the rest of us) his "black magic" baloney actually works! Soon, the place is crawling with moldering zombies hungry for hams. Will they finally, blessedly shut Alan up for good? Watch and find out. Not very gory, but a great scare for those who enjoy zombies and their choice in snacks...


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