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Robot Monster

Robot Monster

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Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Unbridled Insight from the McCarthy Era
Review: (rev. 6/27)
Confronted with the ape-man/invader and bleak post-nuclear imagery, we are also confronted with human survivors. We may or may not take the symbolic hint from the diving helmet, yet we may ask, with all the camouflage in the world, can Ro-Man the Gorilla-suited man from outer space, survive his earth-mission?

Grim would appear the prospect of the surviving earth family. Yet brassy they are, suggesting the faith and hubris of the American way of confronting their post-nuclear fate.

Obviously their enemy is doubly-afflicted: he is not only more primitive and unevolved than they are (he may be scientificaly more evolved, but he is still, in essence, an ape): he is also an ape from outer space. How can this be so? Science as we know it suggests that life forms from another planet are not necessarily likely to be mammalian as ours are. The scientific reasons may be hunted elsewhere: such simple concepts as 'they haven't the same air atmosphere chemistry,' shall serve us for the time being.

If he is, indeed, an ape from outer space, he can't be, ultimately, a very able one.

The viewer is therefore, psychologically prepared at some unconscious level, and from the outset, for success for 'his side.'Yet, at another level, presupposing Darwinian evolution, how does the average viewer inwardly negotiate the eventual failure, of Ro-Man? Surely the concept is rejected by the psyche somewhere. It may even cause considerable upset, as an outcropping of psychic lack of compromise. This may happen as the matter forces its way outward at some inopportune future time, depending on the emotional/ psychological development of the viewer.

Incestual, Oedipal, fate vs. 'free will' issues (as well as those of the potential of wedded bliss for competitive, if mutually attracted, two-career couples in the sciences) present themselves for consideration in this fascinating film. These evident curriculae-enriching potentialities may perhaps be pursued at some other moire opportune juncture. This should be for the benefit of all true believers concerned.

It would be desirable if, in the interim, that students would feel armed with the arguments, information, stimulation and perspectives offered by the previous lecture. Thus enabled, the enterprising among you shall hopefully procure one or more copies of ROBOT MONSTER (the film in question, so readily available as explained above.) S/he might then begin to exercise with good judgment the views offered above, perhaps leavening them with insights gained from other sources ( including one's own thoughts, dreams, conclusions, and ruminations.) Well-prepared by previous viewing of this fantastic, entertaining, and valuable 1950's masterpiece, later lectures will prove even more easy of assimilation.

It is hoped the previous collection of lecture notes enhances one's experiences with ROBOT MONSTER.

But buy the flick. And some grape soda and popcorn balls or something. You'll be glad you did, if you have any kind of a sense of humor.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Incredible! Terrifying! Baffling! Bad!
Review: You couldn't make a poorer excuse of celluloid if you tried. Phil Tucker believed he was creating high art in this supposedly didactic tale of the dangers of nuclear war. Instead, responses to the film were so overwhelmingly negative he attempted suicide (at this too he failed). Frequently mentioned as the worst movie *ever*, _Robot Monster_'s only redeeming value has become one of "so bad it's good," and it is actually used as a serious litmus test by my girlfriend on the dumbness of any future prospect-- an interesting method since you can tailor your own "test questions" to suit your particular suitor!

Differences between the Image DVD and the Rhino VHS: the dvd contains the trailer and is a few minutes longer, owing to an "intermission" title card midway through the film as well as an extra small scene... Both of these are missing from the vhs. In addition the vhs black-bars the young woman's chest when Ro-Man pulls at her dress straps; in the dvd this scene is uncut with no black bars, but no nudity is shown anyway. Also, the vhs is partially 3-D, as the film was presented when originally released; the DVD is "2-D" meaning not 3-D at all, with none of the peculiar picture tone alteration visible in 3-D. The dvd's only flaw might be the absence of one of the funniest parts of the vhs copy: the huge splash sound when the little boy goes off-camera with his mother for "a little water."

Amusing foolery to look out for: The film samples stock footage from _One Million B.C._ and _Flight to Mars_. The plural of Ro-Man is not Ro-Men but "Ro-Mans." (!) The two Ro-Mans in the film are "Great Guidance" Ro-Man and "Earth" Ro-Man. Earth Ro-Man is from the planet Ro-Man (wow! who'd a thunk it???) Also, watch the little girl in the final scene: she picks a winner, if you know what I mean!

Enjoyment rating: 5 stars Critical rating: (static).... (static).....(explosion)..... ERROR! ERROR! REDUCE! .00000000671 stars ..... (static) (lightning flash) NOT POSSIBLE! DOES NOT COMPUTE!

Now you have your mission: go and see _Robot Monster_! Find your own goofs! You have no excuse! Now go! You have one-half earth-turn to complete mission! Anything other than this means failure!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Half a century of scarred psyche (so far)
Review: This movie was released in June 1953. I was born in July 1952. This is important, to me anyway, because watching this movie on TV is the absolute earliest memory I have in my life. So... sitting here in the wee hours (and with obviously nothing better to do) I decided to make good use of today's technology to find out if this movie really existed or not. I'm figuring (guessing) it was probably shown on TV in about mid-1954 to late 1955 which would have made me somewhere between 2 and 3 years old at the time I saw it. I must admit I don't remember much about the plot. But I do remember (like it was yesterday) the "gorilla in the cave" dude with the diving helmet - remember in those days nobody had actually ever gone into outer space but the scientific community generally agreed that (as with the more familiar 'inner space') there was no air out there. It naturally follows that some sort of self contained breathing apparatus would be required for anyone to have gotten from "there" to "here". More importantly, I remember distinctly the intentions of the "leader" - back on planet Ro-man? (no doubt the precursor to the "Great Giant Head" of 3rd Rock fame) - to destroy all humans and take over the world! What evil mind could even conceive of such a thing?! Yet, there it was. Right in my living room on a round, 10 inch, black and white screen. Needless to say, I was terrified! Was anything really safe anymore? The world as I knew it suddenly seemed to have problems (theretofore unknown to me) of a magnitude befitting an entire planet. So... after nearly half a century of consideration my "review" goes as follows:
This movie deals with the fundamental concept of good vs. evil and is not for the very young and/or faint of heart. Sure, it's a fun movie... 'till you lose your planet - then it's not so funny is it?! I think I'm going to buy the movie anyway but I probably won't watch it.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: so bad its comical
Review: This movie is the "WORST" movie I have ever seen in my life.Its so bad that I believe the director of this film committed suicide.I don't want to go into the storyline because there is'nt any.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: An unintentional masterpiece
Review: Question:Is a movie bad if it is entertaining?If continual belly laughs constitute awful filmmaking then on with Robot Monster:The sequel!!! This movie is commonly called one of the "Poverty Row Quickies",a term for 1950's B films shot on extremely low budgets and with "actors" and "directors"that generally had no business being anywhere near a movie camera.This little quicky certainly lives up to its reputation as one of the most laughable films in the history of cinema.It features the worst acting and dialogue this side of a porno movie,a plot that a 5 year old would laugh at and cheesy special effects and props that are endearing in their awfulness.Along with "Pieces",an inept early 80's teen slasher flick of laughable proportions, this is perhaps the funniest unintentional comedy ever made.Ro-man trying to tune into planet Ro-man with his short wave radio is enough to make you laugh yourself into a hernia,if not a coma.So Beware!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Fall Of The Ro-Man Empire!
Review: "Robot Monster" boasts one of the scariest movie monsters of all time. Ro-Man resembles an overweight gorilla wearing a diving helmet! He has managed to wipe out all of the earth's population with a death ray, except for 6 survivors. The leader of the survivors has created a serum which makes them impervious to the alien's death ray. Ro-Man discovers that when he tries to kill the young boy of the group and fails. The kid taunts him with the immortal line, "You look like a pooped-out pinwheel!" Ro-Man reports this development to the Great Guidance by means of a combination short-wave radio/video screen contraption that emits bubbles! The Great Guidance instructs him to kill the survivors by hand. Inexplicably, Ro-Man falls in love with the movie's leading lady and cannot kill her. The Great Guidance learns of his treachery and kills Ro-Man with an interplanetary death ray. The earth is saved! It's too bad they didn't release the Mystery Science Theater 3000 version of "Robot Monster" along with the regular version.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: NOT YOUR WORTH A DIME
Review: "ROBOT MONSTER" is the cheapest movie I have ever seen. In the movie you can see Ro-man's face. You can also tell that its in a costume.I have seen better old sci-fi movies than this. I'm telling you after all the other black and white movies you have seen this will probably be your worse.I have seen movies such as: Frankenstein meets the Wolfman, It came from beneath the sea, Creature from the black loogan, and some other movie I dont know what the name of it is but there are these butterflys attacking a city,but Robot Monster is probably the worst of all.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: one of the funniest films ever made
Review: There is a saying that some movies are so bad they are actually good. Robot Monster is a fantastic example of this. Take a gorrila in a deep sea diving helmet who wanders a desert all day, a familly, who if all their movie talent were combined, would equal that of a cucumber, insane dialoge that will make you fall to the ground laughing and you have a serious contender for the funniest film ever made. This is a fantastic movie that will have you laughing you organs out. Highly recommended.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: This guy is serious!
Review: This movie is more strange than funny. The director is obviously totally serious about his anti-nuclear message, but he tries to illustrate it with what appears to be Burl Ives running around in a gorilla suit, with an antennaed diving helmet over his head. Then, suddenly, there are absolutely hilarious scenes--two of the main characters decide to make out in a field with the murderous Ro-Man shambling around. Then they decide to get married, which turns out to be a big deal when there are only six people left in the world. This is a goofy, bizarre, surreal film, which easily ranks as one of the worst movies ever made.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: An archetypal effort: best of the RO-MAN MOVIES to date
Review: There are luminous reviews here about ROBOT MONSTER IN 3D! The comments about the FX...especially the bubble machine... and the existentially allegorical script along with anagogical descriptions of THE BEAST and his gold-fish bowl helmet speak for themselves. However, context has not been discussed. To properly DECONSTRUCT this unique film I will merely mention aspects of the milieu that produced this cinematic wonder: The A-bomb. The Korean War. McCarthyism. The Pinky Lee Show. The Rosenberg's. Elvis... ("You ain't nothing but a Ro-Man!") If ROBOT MONSTER is evaluated in terms of cultural/political bench marks, viewers begin to discern what can be discerned. Watching Ro-Man...torn between his duty to THE GREAT GUIDANCE and his papable, hu-man lust...shuffling across Phil Tucker's stunningly visualized cosmic vista/panorama, one cannot help but ponder questions of existence and destiny that begin with St. Augustine yet seem to be mocked by post-modernists as stupid. This film forces one to come to grips with stupidity. Who can tach-up his CD player with heavy metal thunder from Lawrence Welk and not be transported to idyllic times when Ro-Mans were Ro-Mans? A DVD with radically-enhanced sound can only enrich this awesome audio/visual experience. I will not even mention the debt that Stanley Kubrick and Francis Ford Coppola admit they owe this seminal film (Orson Welles considered a sequel: CITIZEN RO-MAN). I know most film buffs never missed the rumored R.... C..... project: THE RO-MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE; but one cannot recklessly tamper with mythic stuff. Admittedly basic Ro-man movies are common enough. But even the most critical viewer recognizes ROBOT MONSTER IN 3D! is an archetype, certainly the best...in all its raw glory...Ro-Man movie to date......


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