Forgive And Forget

Rating:
Summary: Love should mean that U should never have to say your sorry
Review: " I love you Theo", murmers David as he lies on the floor, blood streaming from his mouth. As Theo is about to inflict a fatal blow, his girlfriend yells "Don't" he freezes, drops the lead pipe and walks over to her; they glance down and David writhing in pain with a pathetic look on their faces and exit the building. The next scene shows David lying in the grass with a look of selfsatisfaction and relief of comming to terms with himself; freed from the bonds of denial and guilt one experances from being in the closet.
Forgive and Forget, is the name of a talk show, (which appears throughout the movie), in Britain where ppl, couples, friends etc. come to resolve there differences or conflicts live on the air on T.V.
David and Theo have been best friends, "mates", since school days. They work together on Davids fathers construction job. Theo has just moved in with his girlfriend; but there appear to be some tension between the two that mounts and increases as the film progress'es. David too has a conflect boiling and churing within himself. Is it about himself? Is it about another issue? Wer'e not quite sure as the plot or theme of this film is not quite evident; as you just move from one scene to another in these ppl's lives, not sure where the film is taking you or wants you to go, you just move along aware that tensions are building; for awhile I wasn't sure if this was even a gay movie; but foreign films tend to be that way, compared to their American conterparts which have the plot and theme established earlier on. In the end David tries to resolve his conflict but his life collapses around him and he loses all; his parents, Theo, and Theo's girlfriend who, never really like him to begin with so no loss there.
I gave this film only 4 stars as it lost my attention through most of the movie until the end when everthing, then becomes apparent; and the ending is worth viewing as it made me reflect on what could or has happened to gay ppl when they come out to their family and friends and the rejection and violence they have encountered.


Rating:
Summary: A Hard Hitting & Unnerving Love Story
Review: Directed by Aisling Walsh and written by Mark Burt "Forgive and Forget" is a powerful and unnerving love story. Hailed by some and criticized by others I found it to be quite moving as well as disturbing. If a movie can affect you in some way, and it's something you soon won't forget, then I think it's done its job at a fine piece of storytelling. This really hits hard.

The story centers on David (Steve John Shepherd) in a remarkable performance where his brooding looks, body language, and inner turmoil just exudes from him as the story unfolds. You see, David is struggling with his sexuality and the love of another man. With parents he can't seem to talk to, working with macho construction workers, and no one to turn to but tricks he picks up at night, his undying love gets the best of him. His best friend, or mate as they say, is Theo (John Simm) inseparable since childhood. The two work together and play together and it isn't until Theo falls in love and moves in with his girlfriend Hannah (Laura Fraser) that their relationship begins to unravel. Hannah has her own past to deal with and is jealous of their friendship and sees a part of David that Theo can't. Thus she tries to wedge them apart. It's their love that drives these characters actions and feeds the fire. Reminiscent of "Chuck and Buck", David's obsession grows stronger and soon does what he can to break Theo and Hannah up. When he finally does he then makes the ultimate and hard decision about coming out, to himself, Theo, and the world. And although brutal, the outcome for David is one of redemption, acceptance and liberation that he proclaims is the "happiest day of my life". And one you soon won't forget.

I really, really enjoyed this movie. Touching, sad, intense and poignant. The climactic ending hits you over the head and wakes you up to the realities of homophobia, trust, friendship, and loyalties. Steve John Shepherd and John Simm are outstanding in their performances and the supporting cast is equally impressive. I think you'll find this to be one of either you'll love it or hate it. I loved it.

The DVD is presented in Widescreen 16:9 with chapter selection, director and writer commentary, TV spots and cast and crew bios. Soundtrack is Dolby surround. The picture quality is crisp and clear and is a nice transfer.

Rating:
Summary: Didn't like it
Review: I didn't like this movie. The story was weak to begin with. I was really getting sick and tired of Hanna's insecurity. Theo should not have blamed David for breaking up his relationship. If one phone call broke them up then their relationship was doomed to begin with. So I really couldn't care less about that part which took up three quarters of the film. Then David takes Theo on a talkshow and you assume he's going to tell him that he's responsible for Hanna breaking up with him but instead he tells Theo that he's gay. After that pretty much the world hates him and Theo almost kills him with a metal pipe. Great story for bigots but for the rest of us this movie is disturbing and pointless.

Rating:
Summary: Flawed Slice-of-life Movie Worth Watching
Review: I do not find the movie itself homophobic, although the subject matter deals with homophobia in less than profound ways. The central character, David, is a working class closet case who secretly loves his best friend, Theo, a straight man involved in a serious relationship with an insecure woman, Hannah. Hannah, in turn, has recently broken up with a long-time lover due to his infidelities. David underhandedly plots to destroy Theo's relationship by preying upon Hannah's insecurities and by making her believe that the innocent Theo has been unfaithful. Theo, in turn, helps the disintegration of his relationship along (a bit too conveniently, plot-wise) by lying to Hannah about his whereabouts on a particular weekend. After succeeding in breaking the couple up, David comes out on a national talk show (aptly referred to as "confessional television" by the British) and confesses his love, with unhappy results.

After reading some other reviewers' comments, I'm particularly bewildered by those who expect some type of happy denouement in which Theo sweetly forgives David and the two ride off into the sunset. Maybe in someone's porn fantasy, but not here. I guess my own sense of morality must be terribly quaint and old-fashioned to suggest that David has thoroughly betrayed Theo by nefariously plotting to destroy his happiness "for Theo's own good." Theo discovers the truth of David's plotting, and not through David himself. Theo's subsequent anger and violence toward David has nothing to do with David's alleged love or with homophobia, but it has a LOT to do with a scheming friend's complete betrayal. Even if Theo were gay, is David the kind of man a reasonably adjusted person would want for a lover, let alone, friend?

As for homophobia -- the movie illustrates the day-to-day homophobia found among the English working classes (although, frankly, having lived in England, I find that the worst homophobia is found among the middle classes). However, working class blokes are prone to reticence and have trouble discussing their emotional states, honestly captured here, which is one reason David has such a tough time emerging from his closet. And like all closet cases, David's self-esteem is perhaps not what it should be or could be.

David's addiction to confessional TV and his determination to blow his wad on national television is peculiar and not overly convincing. Granted, the writer sets up from the beginning David's attraction to his favorite TV show, but David's actually admitting his love for Theo in such a manner rings hollow and is in contrast to all his deviousness up until this point. It's just not emotionally true for this up-to-now reserved character. In fact, it's downright stupid, and I suppose one could argue that David is suddenly operating in a self-destructive mode, but I find nothing in the writing of his character to suggest that he would make such a blunder. I think the real character, as presented, would save his confessions of love in a private moment with Theo.

The screenwriter admits that he himself is not gay and is more concerned with a triangle relationship in which betrayal plays a part. And the screenwriter is good at illustrating this. But the subject of living in a closet and finally coming out is, frankly, beyond his scope, and this is where the movie is flawed. Any gay man or woman knows that coming out is a process, a progression that doesn't happen in one overly dramatic flourish, on national TV, no less. And frankly, the movie offers no evidence of any progression for David, who in reality would have to deal with a) coming out and then b) confessing his secret love.

I've mentioned the problem with the unmerited national TV confession and Theo's lying to Hannah about his weekend. The third plot failure deals with Hannah's willingness to believe the worst about Theo based mainly on a phone call Theo receives from another woman (that David has set up). Oh, c'mon! No matter how insecure or tender Hannah's emotional state, the phone call would hardly constitute her going ballistic, and if she's that unbalanced then David is probably right -- Theo would be better off without her. In conclusion, plot trickery is just not a substitute for emotional truthfulness, and this is where this otherwise watchable film ultimately fails.

Rating:
Summary: Flawed Slice-of-life Movie Worth Watching
Review: I do not find the movie itself homophobic, although the subject matter deals with homophobia in less than profound ways. The central character, David, is a working class closet case who secretly loves his best friend, Theo, a straight man involved in a serious relationship with an insecure woman, Hannah. Hannah, in turn, has recently broken up with a long-time lover due to his infidelities. David underhandedly plots to destroy Theo's relationship by preying upon Hannah's insecurities and by making her believe that the innocent Theo has been unfaithful. Theo, in turn, helps the disintegration of his relationship along (a bit too conveniently, plot-wise) by lying to Hannah about his whereabouts on a particular weekend. After succeeding in breaking the couple up, David comes out on a national talk show (aptly referred to as "confessional television" by the British) and confesses his love, with unhappy results.

After reading some other reviewers' comments, I'm particularly bewildered by those who expect some type of happy denouement in which Theo sweetly forgives David and the two ride off into the sunset. Maybe in someone's porn fantasy, but not here. I guess my own sense of morality must be terribly quaint and old-fashioned to suggest that David has thoroughly betrayed Theo by nefariously plotting to destroy his happiness "for Theo's own good." Theo discovers the truth of David's plotting, and not through David himself. Theo's subsequent anger and violence toward David has nothing to do with David's alleged love or with homophobia, but it has a LOT to do with a scheming friend's complete betrayal. Even if Theo were gay, is David the kind of man a reasonably adjusted person would want for a lover, let alone, friend?

As for homophobia -- the movie illustrates the day-to-day homophobia found among the English working classes (although, frankly, having lived in England, I find that the worst homophobia is found among the middle classes). However, working class blokes are prone to reticence and have trouble discussing their emotional states, honestly captured here, which is one reason David has such a tough time emerging from his closet. And like all closet cases, David's self-esteem is perhaps not what it should be or could be.

David's addiction to confessional TV and his determination to blow his wad on national television is peculiar and not overly convincing. Granted, the writer sets up from the beginning David's attraction to his favorite TV show, but David's actually admitting his love for Theo in such a manner rings hollow and is in contrast to all his deviousness up until this point. It's just not emotionally true for this up-to-now reserved character. In fact, it's downright stupid, and I suppose one could argue that David is suddenly operating in a self-destructive mode, but I find nothing in the writing of his character to suggest that he would make such a blunder. I think the real character, as presented, would save his confessions of love in a private moment with Theo.

The screenwriter admits that he himself is not gay and is more concerned with a triangle relationship in which betrayal plays a part. And the screenwriter is good at illustrating this. But the subject of living in a closet and finally coming out is, frankly, beyond his scope, and this is where the movie is flawed. Any gay man or woman knows that coming out is a process, a progression that doesn't happen in one overly dramatic flourish, on national TV, no less. And frankly, the movie offers no evidence of any progression for David, who in reality would have to deal with a) coming out and then b) confessing his secret love.

I've mentioned the problem with the unmerited national TV confession and Theo's lying to Hannah about his weekend. The third plot failure deals with Hannah's willingness to believe the worst about Theo based mainly on a phone call Theo receives from another woman (that David has set up). Oh, c'mon! No matter how insecure or tender Hannah's emotional state, the phone call would hardly constitute her going ballistic, and if she's that unbalanced then David is probably right -- Theo would be better off without her. In conclusion, plot trickery is just not a substitute for emotional truthfulness, and this is where this otherwise watchable film ultimately fails.

Rating:
Summary: Film Has Some Merit Despite Some Flaws
Review: I enjoyed this film very much. It strikes a common chord for a lot of gay people who have suffered rejection and pain for their coming out of the closet. How many can identify with the lead character David, obviously suffering from the depression of an unrequited love for his best straight friend of fourteen years, a fellow named Theo. What gives this film merit is that they made the gay character straight acting, devoid of all feminine stereotypes that most gay films project into their lead gay characters. In an ironic twist, his best friend, Theo, played by John Simm is decidedly feminine acting and looking yet he is the straight guy. Unfortunately, Simm and the actress who plays his girlfriend have NO chemistry, thus making their relationship implausible. If it is true that gay people look for "looks in a person first" rather than personality, then this movie proves that this is a myth. I liked the fact that David, who could have any man he wanted (because HE is the good looking one) saw beyond Theo's average looks and felt a genuine, albeit, obsessive and unhealthy love for him. One sympathizes with David because he is so obviously miserable having to stand by and watch his best friend get it on with the girlfriend, and then hear the details afterward. Again, how many gay people have ever been in this situation? It is a common occurrence in the gay community. Another implausibility is the "coming out on a talk show" with a near "Jenny Jones" type of fiasco at the end with Theo nearly beating David to a pulp until his girlfriend, who inexplicably and conveniently shows up and stops him from killing David. One can't believe that Theo would have THAT much violence and hated toward David, no matter what drove David to break up the relationship between Theo and the girlfriend. John Simm (Theo) did not play the aspect of homophobia convincingly enough to warrant his attack. The film ends with David serenely contended in a lush, green park, free at last. Free from hiding, yes, but free from his love for THeo? I think not. The film was, indeed, realistic in its attempt to portray the consequences of coming out and a homophobic society. However, the end result is that, in my opinion, one is not entirely convinced that Theo would abandon David in such a violent way. Not after being taken care of and defended by David for fourteen years. Thanks to the fine portrayal of the actor who played David, this film has merit because he made the character sympathetic and identifiable, despite some of the malicious things he was driven to do for the sake of his love for Theo. This film is worth a look.

Rating:
Summary: Thoughtful and true to life
Review: I found this movie engrossing. The characters are well developed and believable while in the best British manner there was no over sentimentality. The down to earth approach and lack of pretension is so refreshing.

The setting was good, dialogue had impact and clarity while the acting was excellent, with both main actors totally committed to their roles.

I note that others found the ending of this movie hard to take as it didn't fit their mould of being positive about being gay. The ending would have been contrived if the straight character had anything but negative feelings towards David. A positive from this is that the film is a slice of "real life" and as such enlightens the viewer to the realities of what being gay can be like in a world dominated by homophobia.

I rate this movie in the same class as Trick and Beautiful Thing, and more than worthy of the rating given.

Rating:
Summary: Brendon Deiter
Review: I hear alot of negative remarks about this film, and after watching it, I wonder if these people who thought so negativly were even watching the same film? I found that the acters played the roles quite well, the story line was very believable, and all-in-all it was a very good movie.

Watching it brought me back to a time when I was back in the closet; when I was inlove with my best friend, and I think that John Shepard was excellent at playing the part of David and getting us to feel how he did.

At the end when he admitted his sexuality, and everyone had turned on him, I noticed some people had said it was 'unbelievable'. How could someone say that. It happenes everyday to people all over the world. Parents turn you away, you lose friends, get beat up. I found it to be very believable. And what I really liked at the end was how after his parents turned him away and he was beaten up by his best friend, He still was strong enough to say that it was the best day of his life. I think it had a very positive ending. I tink this was a great movie and I would highly recommend it.

Rating:
Summary: Brendon Deiter
Review: I hear alot of negative remarks about this film, and after watching it, I wonder if these people who thought so negativly were even watching the same film? I found that the acters played the roles quite well, the story line was very believable, and all-in-all it was a very good movie.

Watching it brought me back to a time when I was back in the closet; when I was inlove with my best friend, and I think that John Shepard was excellent at playing the part of David and getting us to feel how he did.

At the end when he admitted his sexuality, and everyone had turned on him, I noticed some people had said it was 'unbelievable'. How could someone say that. It happenes everyday to people all over the world. Parents turn you away, you lose friends, get beat up. I found it to be very believable. And what I really liked at the end was how after his parents turned him away and he was beaten up by his best friend, He still was strong enough to say that it was the best day of his life. I think it had a very positive ending. I tink this was a great movie and I would highly recommend it.

Rating:
Summary: Won't Forgive and Won't Forget It
Review: I really enjoyed this movie right up until the last fifteen minutes when it fell apart and turned exceedingly nasty, ugly, and senselessly violent.

For the first 75 minutes, this is an engaging film. It deals with two lifelong friends, plasterer David (Steve John Shepherd) and Theo (John Simm). David is gay, but has admitted this to no one, especially Theo, whom he loves. Their friendship is tested when Theo falls in love with the attractive, but insecure, Hannah (Laura Fraser). David and Hannah see in each other a threat to their own relationship with David, and they each take steps to undermine the other. It's petty, it's painful, but it's human. The performances by the three leads are realistic and heartfelt. The script by Mark Burt and the direction by Aisling Walsh are solid when they deal with the three leads. (I am less convinced by the direction of, writing of, and acting by David's coworkers.)

However, the movie falls completely apart in the last fifteen minutes. The climax takes place on the set of a fictional TV show called "Forgive and Forget" where one guest admits a transgression while the sinned against listens and declares whether he or she can forgive and forget. After David does something that drives a wedge between Theo and Hannah, he arranges an appearance on the show for him and Theo. I assumed that it would be to admit what he'd done that hurt Theo's relationship with Hannah. That would have made for good storytelling.

Instead, writer Burt wrenches the story in a completely different direction, and one that has caused other reviewers here to call the film homophobic. It's hard not to agree with that assessment. Burt has David ask forgiveness from Theo for being gay, as if this is something that must be forgiven! As offensive as that is, the final scene where the two confront each other after the show is even more heinous and completely undermines the rest of the movie. It is ugly, it is violent, and the last image of Theo walking away from David implies that writer Burt and director Walsh endorse the actions taken by the character Theo. It's thoroughly repulsive.

I can not, in good conscience, recommend this to anybody.

I have not listened to the commentary track, although there is one. I'm not sure I want to listen to Mark Burt and Aisling Walsh trying to justify their work.

I would suggest giving this a skip and go directly to the British "Queer as Folk (series one)", "Get Real", "My Beautiful Laundrette", "Maurice", or "Boyfriends"

(C)2001 Joe Edkin