Rating: 
Summary: Lots of messages
Review: I love British films, they tackle reality so well!The theme of this film is hard to pin-point. It is so much more than just a grandmother's fling with her daughter's lover. It's about a family's existing problems which come to a head after the death of the father. We can all relate to the loss of a family member and what it can do to those directly affected. May is a lady who finds herself unsure of direction after suddenly losing her husband. The thought of returning to an empty home is the last thing she wants, so she moves in with her daughter (after feeling rejection from her son's wife). This new arrangement opens up old wounds for the daughter who blames her mother for the way her own life has turned out. During the days, May stays at her son's home doing housework and after school care for her grandchildren. During this time, she begins a friendship with her daughter's lover who is building a sun-room there. It all seems unlikely at first considering May disliked him as her daughter's married lover. However, as the film develops ,these two characters unite both facing their owne cross-roads. This turns into anintimate relationship, although short-lived. Impressive acting from all concerned throughout the film. Worth seeing.
Rating: 
Summary: Beautifully acted but morally too flawed to be good
Review: I won't go over the story again, enough people before me have done this. Suffice it to say that as a grandmother myself, albeit younger than May/Anne Reid, my overriding feeling when watching this movie was a depressing sense of betrayal. Why was this woman so disliked by her children? At first I didn't understand it; after all she was only trying to be nice. But as the film unfolded it became clear that everything was about May, not about anyone else. Her ultimate act of betrayal, to sleep with Darren, hardly dented her feelings of guilt at all. She was happiest when it was going on, and felt no remorse. After Paula had hit her and she went home, she showed no after effects except loneliness that she was on her own again , and set out on holiday the next day with a spring in her step. At no time did she even consider what her daughter might be feeling.
What message does this film bring besides being a self indulgent sexually charged gazing at several navels? That it is OK to betray your children for your own purposes so long as you "need it."
I don't think so.
Ruthie from London
Rating: 
Summary: Mum
Review: May (Anne Reid) has outlived her husband of many years. And over the years she has become merely an unhappy and under appreciated appendage of her marriage and of her family. She has no life of her own, no identity outside of her marriage and family. Her children and her grandchildren look at her as if she were from another planet: she feels unloved and unwanted. Throughout her marriage she felt as if she were removed from her life as a mother and wife; so much so that she says: "I feel that I wasn't even present." Then she meets Darren (Daniel Craig), her daughter Paula's (Cathryn Bradshaw) boyfriend.
As directed by Roger McNeil and written by Hanif Kureishi (My Beautiful Launderette), "The Mother" is beautifully and audaciously staged and photographed in such a way that the aural and visual images give life to the themes of isolation, abandonment, familial love and commitment.
May's relationship with Darren is dealt with in such a blunt, straightforward manner that their scenes together come off as a revelation, even revolutionary if truth be told. "The Mother" is an adult film with adult concerns, predicaments and resolutions.
"The Mother" is about the pain of growing old, of living a life of which you can be proud. It is a cautionary tale on the perils of shutting yourself off from the world, of dealing with problems by hiding from them and by subjugating your wishes because of a false sense of duty. It is therefore, a film about taking chances and embracing life even if it means risking societal censure and embarrassment.
Rating:
Summary: "I don't want to grow old!"
Review: One of the first things that struck me about "the Mother" was how disaffected, distant, and unemotional she is. In fact, her entire family seems to be so totally self-absorbed, self-obsessed and overly materialistic that not one character is at all likable. Rather than appearing as a shining beacon of love and support to her children, May (a marvelous Anne Reid), comes across as more concerned about her own failings. While ready to listen on the surface, deep down she's a middle-class, snobby, and somewhat uncaring mother who probably loves her children when it's convenient for her, but has spent the majority of her life resenting her children for stifling her when she was younger. The sexy affair she embarks on with her daughter's boyfriend, without regard for her daughter's feelings, says a lot about the years of pent-up repression inside of her.
Astutely observing the intricacies and nuances of English domestic middle-class life, director Roger Michell, allows us to peek into the lives of the elderly May and Toots (Peter Vaughan) as they visit their grown children in London. They are a long-married and well-to-do couple. Bobby (Steven Mackintosh), their busy son has a glamorous life style, a thriving business, a new house, and a wife and two children. Paula (Cathryn Bradshaw), their daughter, is a single mother, a schoolteacher, and an unpublished writer. When Toots suddenly dies of a heart attack, May, in a fit of fear and loneliness, moves in with her children to escape the solitude of her house. Her arrival at Bobby's causes problems so May goes to stay with the busy Paula.
Going back and forth from Paula's flat to Bobby's house, May meets Darren (a gorgeously sexy Daniel Craig), Bobby's robust, muscle-laden best friend who is doing some building work on the house. After Paula asks her mother to find out whether Darren wants to marry her, May becomes friendly with Darren. They have lunch together and there's obviously a connection because May kisses Darren. Soon their friendship becomes physical and with Darren sexually thrilling her, they begin an incredibly hot affair. May is a frumpy grandmother in her sixties, while Darren is a bearded, virile man in his thirties.
All the characters in this film are absolutely mired in dysfunction. May is unhappy and alone, and she fears becoming old. Her children don't particularly like her, and Paula, especially, bitterly resents her; she thinks that May's been a lousy mother who never "encouraged" her. Paula is portrayed as neurotic, hysterical and cloying, and her obsession with Darren totally gets in the way of her ability to see that Darren is kind of useless and doesn't particularly love her. Darren is also haunted: he drinks too much, copes with an autistic son, and sleeps in his car. He's always poor and seeks solace from his problems in doing lines of coke. At first Darren is nice to May, and she offers to take him on as a type of sugar mother to him, but soon she begins to see his other side.
The Mother is a beautifully acted movie with Daniel Craig and Anne Reid giving astoundingly realistic performances. The sex scenes between them both are totally realistic and beautifully done, the connection between them being far more than just sex. Reid is especially good at portraying a complicated, middle-aged woman, who is actively seeking her own fulfillment and rediscovering parts of herself that have lain dormant for years. Craig is also great as her young, spunky suitor easily portraying a good man who seems to be very kind and understanding until May, unrealistically tries to push their relationship. The Mother is a quiet, complex and very adult film that analyses, with a type of subtle restraint, the deleterious effects of selfishness, egocentricity, and self-interest on families. Mike Leonard December 04.
Rating:
Summary: A Tender Examination of the Alienation and Isolation of Man
Review: THE MOTHER is an extraordinary film that addresses many issues plaguing our society today: the problem of aging, death, the disintegration of the core family unit, the need for love transferred unsuccessfully onto casual sex, and loneliness at the end of the day.
May (Anne Reid of 'Love and Death on Long Island', 'The Dresser', 'Liam' in a stunningly underplayed performance) and her husband Toots (Peter Vaughn) have traveled from Northern England to visit their children and grandchildren in London. Son Bobby (Steven Mackintosh) is married to his work and to a cold wife Helen (Anna Wilson-Jones) who is self-absorbed and not at all ready for the intrusion of an 'old couple' in her home currently under remodeling by a friend of Booby's, a carpenter Darren (Daniel Craig) who just happens to be the lover of May's and Toot's other divorced and perennially frustrated daughter Paula (Cathryn Bradshaw).
Toots dies rather abruptly, leaving May lost in a world she views as strange and unfriendly, so trapped in her marriage of many years to a man who never acknowledged her worth as a person. Unable to return to her home, May is offered a place to stay with Bobby and spends time looking after Paula's single-parented child. Through a gradual a very delicate mutual need, May becomes infatuated with Darren who is half her age and because of Darren's mutual neediness, the two have a sexual as well as a spiritual bonding. The bizarre circumstances of mother and daughter bedding the same man are discovered and the manner in which this fragmented family unit copes provides an ending that will surprise few, but will touch the hearts of all.
Roger Michell ('Notting Hill, etc) directs Hanef Kureishi's ('My Beautiful Launderette') screenplay with sensitivity and grace, never allowing the film or his characters' acting to be mawkish or maudlin. The cinematography is some of the finest you will see in a film of a small story: frames suggest minimalist art constructions, even Mondrian forms. Likewise the musical score is generally limited to a simple, elegantly lonely piano. This is a profound statement that hopefully will jar many people into re-examining life in the 21st Century and try to repair some of the devastating effects of alienation in a time of need. Highly Recommended.
Rating:
Summary: Superb Acting
Review: There is something about British films that make you forget you are actually watching a movie. The acting in this film is near perfect; it makes you realize just how mediocre the genre is in America.
To see an older woman paired with a younger male is shocking only because we never see it. Put Jack Nicholson or Sean Connery in a similar scenario and there is no such surprise, as if men can move into the second stage of life without any thought to their own fading beauty or virility. It speaks to the social alienation that is forced upon women when they become middle-aged and the lack of respect shown by children who are too busy to notice just how lonely and lost their parents have become.
The dialogue is authentic, the emotions are perfectly conveyed, and it is difficult to know which character is most sympathetic. The mother character is complex, subtle, and at times ambiguous. Her children are flawed in their own ways and the lover is at once admirable and pitiful. I highly recommend this film.
Rating:
Summary: Complex human drama that treads in forbidden places
Review: This 2003 British import is a more than just the domestic drama it seems at first. It goes deeply into the heart and soul of some troubled human beings and uncovers some disturbing universal truths.
Ann Reid is cast the mother. She and her ailing husband travel a few hours to visit their adult son and daughter in London. While there, the husband dies. She's in deep grief and doesn't want to return home. Instead, she stays with her daughter, a single mother, who is having a robust affair with a carpenter who is renovating the son's home. The mother tries to understand the daughter but she sees that the daughter is really unhappy with the relationship, mainly because the carpenter is married.
The mother, however, is attracted to the carpenter too, even though he is a young man. (He was born in 1978; she was born in 1935). Soon they, too, are frolicking in bed. It's a hot and heavy relationship. Of course there are complications, especially since he is still bedding down the daughter.
I must applaud the acting in this film. Everyone seemed completely authentic, even if they weren't always likeable. The script was unique too as it tread in forbidden places and was full of complex human drama. It was a good story, even if I did find it a little slow paced for my taste. And, also, as I've said before, even though I'm an English speaker, I sometimes wish there were subtitles in British films because I just don't get every single line.
This is a real story that rings true and I did enjoy the experience of watching it. I definitely recommend it.
Rating: 
Summary: Mommy dearest... you are a slut.
Review: This has to be one of the worst movies I've seen this year. Aren't movies supposed to entertain and enlighten the viewer? This movie has no likable characters, a weak plot and no morals from beginning to end. These characters have no dignity and are terribly unrealistic. I have never known a mother to do anything like this. A true mother's love for her children is stronger than [...].
This movie is like watching a really bad Jerry Springer episode. Mom is screwing her daughter's lover who also happens to be envolved with somebody else. Lets wait and see who throws the first blow. It's just plain unbelievable and [...].
Rating:
Summary: Very Unsettling
Review: This movie is a heavy hitter. The mother betrays the daughter. Mother's aren't supposed to behave this way (bedding their daughter's lover). The mother's loneliness is terribly sad. Her children don't want her around. But you get the feeling that the mother's lack of "mothering" in the past caused the rift. The family doesn't seem to know each other any more. You wonder how they became so estranged. Not all mother's have their children's best interest at heart. This is a disturbing story you can chew on for a long time as the meat's a little tough.
Rating:
Summary: "Why shouldn't I be difficult?"
Review: When May (Anne Reid) is suddenly widowed, she decides to stay with her two adult children, Bobby and Paula who live in London. Bobby (Steven Macintosh) is extremely harried, and his house is chaotic. When May hears Bobby and his wife arguing about the fact that she's staying, she begins to feel awkward. Too depressed to return to her empty home, May moves back and forth between Bobby and Paula's homes. At first, it seems as though there's a place in Paula's life for her mother. Paula is a single mother, a budding writer, and she also teaches writing. Paula welcomes her mother, and May seems to bring stability into the home. Paula, it seems, is having an affair with married handyman, Darren (Daniel Craig), an old friend of Bobby's.
May has certain roles relegated to her by her children. She's a mother (and not a very satisfactory one, according to Paula), and a grandmother (although her grandchildren don't seem thrilled about this). As she stays in London, it becomes apparent that May is quietly lonely and sad, and when she strikes up a friendship with Darren, the handyman, things seem to take a predictable turn.
With a script from Hanif Kureishi, "The Mother" is anything BUT ordinary and predictable. When the neurotic Paula complains and whines about being ignored by May, it seems as though Paula is just blaming May for all of her failures, but as the story develops, it becomes clear that there are some underlying rather nasty problems between Paula and May. The characters continue to develop marvelously throughout the film. Darren, for example, seems fairly harmless at the beginning of the film. He's taking ages to finish the add-on conservatory at Bobby's home. According to Paula, he's a "lovely, lovely man" and apparently May tries to dissuade Paula from this relationship while pursuing a relationship of her own with Darren. Ultimately, this unpredictable film shakes up our notions of what a mother is and how a mother should behave. May is a woman who makes some stupid mistakes, and the fact that she hurts people along the way is secondary to her desires.
The film may offend the moral sensibilities of some of its audience. I found all the characters--with the exception of Bobby--quite unsympathetic. It's not necessary for me to like the characters to enjoy a film, but the fact that I disliked the characters is a testament to how GOOD this film is. "The Mother" challenges pre-conceived notions of roles within the family structure as well as the assumption that older people 'have it together' when perhaps they're just as unhappy or psychologically traumatized as the rest of us--they have just learned to hide it. How often do we really get to know the people behind the roles in our lives (mother, father, etc)? May is a woman who was never particularly happy as a wife or as a mother, and she wasn't great in either role. Does a parent have value beyond the role they play in our lives? "The Mother" is a challenging and thought-provoking film, and I recommend it highly--displacedhuman
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