Red Water

Rating:
Summary: Oh the humanity!
Review: "Red Water," a made for television film starring Lou Diamond Phillips and Kristy Swanson, carries on the now long and wearisome tradition of ripping off "Jaws." You would think that nearly thirty years after Steven Spielberg's project arrived in theaters filmmakers and producers might move on to another genre. You would be wrong. Every year brings us even more "animal gone wild" flicks, everything from sharks, octopi, whales, snakes, bears, rats, ants, birds, cats, dogs, dinosaurs, crocodiles, alligators, and genetic laboratory experiments gone horribly awry ripping their way through a fresh crop of hapless humans. If the creature in question has sharp teeth, claws, wings, talons, tentacles, and pincers expect to see the monster in question appear in a low budget, straight to video knockoff of "Jaws." Sure, there are elaborations to the standard plot lines, none of which significantly improves these rip-offs, but all of them owe a big debt to Steven Spielberg's film. For example, "Red Water" tries something a little different by having a freshwater shark terrorize people on a Louisiana River. It also inserts a plot thread about a gang of criminals recovering a stash of money from the riverbed. None of these ideas disguises what is really going on.

"Red Water" is the story of John Sanders (Lou Diamond Phillips), a down on his luck fisherman with an ex-wife, horrific memories of a disaster from his days as an oil drilling technician, and loans on his boat he can't afford to repay. At the same time Sanders dithers with the bank about his delinquent loan payments, a shark somehow manages to enter the river and promptly wreaks havoc on swimmers, fishermen, and anyone else who manages to get in the way. Sanders could care less about the shark, primarily because he doesn't know about it at first and also because his ex-wife Kelli (Kristy Swanson) just walked back into his life. She's a scientist working for some big oil company that is drilling for natural gas on the river, and she knows that John is an expert on this sort of thing. Whether you buy the idea that a scientist would go by the name "Kelli" is another matter. Sanders eventually agrees to help out when he learns that the oil executives will pay him handsomely for his troubles. After all, he'll do just about anything to bring in enough cash to keep his boat. What none of these people know is that they will run headlong into several sharks, one that swims and several that walk around on two legs.

The movie switches focus long enough to tell us about some Jamaican criminal who lost a ton of money in the river when one of his underlings dropped the box containing the cash in the water while eluding the authorities. This guy hires some mercenary thug, along with a goon named Ice (Coolio), to go track down the subordinate in an effort to persuade him to reveal the location of the cash. And wouldn't you know it? The site just happens to lie right near the oilrig where Sanders and Kelli eventually show up! What follows is incredibly predictable: the criminals take over Sanders's vessel because they think these guys angling for the money, a disaster occurs on the rig that claims the lives of several workers, and the shark turns up to chow down on a few of the principals. How predictable is "Red Water"? Not only is there a Cajun chap helping out on Sanders's boat, we get a few scenes of a Cajun party complete with music and dancing. Just in case you aren't aware that you should laugh at these hicks, the script throws in a few lines comparing the party to "Deliverance." How clever and original is that? I'm starting to get real tired of seeing this sort of prejudice in films and television shows. If you put any minority group in the place of these Cajuns and did the same thing, the outcry would be deafening.

It's not the overt prejudice of the Cajun scenes that sinks "Red Water"; it's everything else. The venerable Lou Diamond Phillips hasn't made a good film since...well...I can't recall, actually. I quit following his career after "The First Power." As for Kristy Swanson, I was surprised to see her here. I remember her star rising in the early to mid 1990s, but at some point she fell off the radar and, if "Red Water" is any indication, into B-movie purgatory. It's sad, really, because she's not that bad of an actress. Coolio, on the other hand, goes over the top in his role as a thug looking for some money. If I had known from the start that this guy was in the film, I wouldn't have watched it. Aside from the performances, or the lack thereof, the production values are low, the pace drags, and the film has the propensity to put the strangest dialogue in its characters' mouths. I really, really wish I had written down some of the odd lines uttered by Phillips's character. I remember watching the movie and thinking at the time, "I should write that down and use it later in a review." For some reason, I didn't. Probably because I just wanted this thing to end quickly.

In another bizarre turn, the movie carries a 'R' rating even though there isn't much bloody carnage going on. The only extras on the disc, fortunately, are trailers for "Bats," "The Big Hit," and "Ride or Die." If you're really interested in watching creatures attack flicks, there are plenty of other bad movies to choose from, most of them unintentionally hilarious schlockfests that manage to entertain on some level. "Red Water" is too bland, too confused plot wise, and too full of actors on the downhill slide of their careers to be entertaining. If you decide to head up this river, good luck to you.





Rating:
Summary: Stooopid movie
Review: I can't help by not like anything about this movie. The actors seem to be as uninterested in making the movie as I was in watching it. I returned it so fast it made the cashier dizzy. Skip this stinker. Trust me. You'll have more fun at the dentist.

Rating:
Summary: Stooopid movie
Review: I can't help by not like anything about this movie. The actors seem to be as uninterested in making the movie as I was in watching it. I returned it so fast it made the cashier dizzy. Skip this stinker. Trust me. You'll have more fun at the dentist.

Rating:
Summary: Better than some think
Review: I just watched this movie last night. I had no idea if it was going to be any good considering the mixed reviews floating around online. While it certainly isn't spectacular, Red Water does have a decent script and tries to put a few new spins on the killer shark concept. It was decent, and people were concerned about the shark throughout the movie. It's just that the shark does not feature predominantly through the whole movie. With all of the shark movies around (most which are awful 2nd rate versions of the Jaws series -and by the way, Megalodon was terrible) this made for tv movie goes for a more atmospheric feel. A lot of time is spent trying to build up the characters, and unlike Jaws, the shark gets pushed into the background more while they are doing character development. From the Cajun countryside inhabitants reminiscent of the better developed Cajun town in the movie Southern Comfort, to the criminals trying to recover loot, this movie comes off as a sort of Jaws meets Anaconda meets its own take on it all. The acting is fine, the cinematography is decent, and it's an enjoyable watch for someone not wanting the movie to raise the bar on the shark genre or something. There is even a decent amount of humor in the movie, some of it more subtle and maybe more recognizable if your familiar with the Jaws series. If you want only the best, stick with Jaws, if you want a movie that raises the bar on underwater movies (though not with sharks as a focus) then try The Deep with Nick Nolte, Robert Shaw, and Jacqueline Bisset. However, if your looking for another shark movie that is fun and halfway decent, try Red Water or Deep Blue Sea. They are the only two decent shark movies I know of existing at this time outside of the Jaws series.

Rating:
Summary: What shark??
Review: I watched this movie, seeing that it was a "shark" movie. But where's the shark?? The plot is these people are hostages. The shark is just there so us shark fanatics have a reason to see this awful movie. But I was watching going, "okay, they're in the water, where is the shark???" Even JAWS 3, (which sucked) has more sharks. If you like hoatage movies, see this. (on second thought, don't...) But if you like sharks, see something else.

Rating:
Summary: Red Water
Review: On the surface, pardon the pun, Red Water may look to be another JAWS rip-off. And putting Lou Diamond Phillips and Kristy Swanson as your lead performers would seal the deal. Well, you'd be right, it is a Jaws rip. But, there are some things to be said about this made-for-TV popcorn flick.

Since the shark in the movie does its damage in the brackish water Atchafalaya River in Louisiana, we get a different view of the shark than seen in those countless other shark films. And on some level, it works. No crystal blue water here.

Since RED WATER is made for television, the gore level is kept to a minimum, so to sell the picture there are some creative attacks. An ecologically minded tour guide is ripped from a bridge in a well executed surprise attack.

The film does offer some poor acting and often silly script, especially the subplot involving some drug kingpins. But the animatronic shark doesn't need a script and does an admirable job. On a few occasions, the shark is a computer rendered animal that is not as impressive.

Red Water may be worth a look.


Rating:
Summary: A bullshark! Wasted...
Review: This movie got 2 stars only because they used a bullshark. If they'd used a commonly used shark they'd have gotten no stars from me!
I love shark movies...I was too young for Jaws, but I get excited to see movies that aren't about great whites. And as far as I know this was the first one about BULLSHARKS! They can live in lakes which makes them really scary. Yay!
Well, the focus of this movie wasn't really on the sharks/shark as it was on a flimsy plot about robbers and thieves hunting for treasure and a crewman trying to get along with his ex wife on a business-boating trip. No one was worried about sharks until the last minute and it was all put it on the backburner. The good thing about this was that it wasn't a thinly veiled soft-porn like SOME movies. That still doesn't make it a shark movie! PLEASE someone make a good movie about the bullshark!

Rating:
Summary: Harmless.
Review: What's wrong with a straight-up shark thriller? Deep Blue Sea showed us that character development and sparkling dialogue aren't necessary when you approach shark movies with craftsmanship and little pretention.

RED WATER is here to remind us how hideously wrong it can all go. Should we start with the acting? Let's. Lou Diamond Phillips is not a bad actor. I loved his over-the-top performance in THE BIG HIT, but he plays it straight here, bogging down in unspeakable dialogue and trying to make the melodrama appear genuine. I haven't seen Kristy Swanson since the Buffy Movie. Her appearance is significant because I thought she was dead.. :/
Coolio doesn't need much talent: he character ought to be natural to him. The bad guy is okay, typically scruffy and unshaven.

All of these actors certainly could have done better had they had better dialogue to spew. How many times have we seen the scene where the ex-husband and ex-wife begin to be reuinted in the face of danger? How about where the hero mournfully recounts his troubled past?

But let's talk about what REALLY matters. The animatronic shark looks great, but it is intercut with some shoddy CGI work, and it frequently changes size and shape. There are several attacks at the beginning, all of them predictable (a bad sign, DEEP BLUE SEA's best attacks were viscous and surprising) and bloody, but not done in a visceral fashion. There's no new camerawork or methods of making an old creature attack more hard-hitting. When people are killed, I felt very little.

Several opportunities to create genuine suspense (the flashing on the underwater lights to alert the divers of the sharks presence) are squandered so often that their mere possibilites must have been accidents.

The movie also bogs down in a ridiculous treasure-hunting plot. I realize this is necessary to keep the characters in "the crucible" (i.e., keeping them always in conflict) but why must if be so pretentious? Why must there be "human" conflict with the drug dealers? Why must there be explosions? Unless you're DEEP BLUE SEA, less is more.

And by the way, the phrase "The Jaws of Death" will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS be lame and hackneyed, no matter what language it's in. (You'd think if they were going to pull it off in French, they wouldn't have translated it for us)

Speaking of cliches, see if you can count the ones in this movie. My favorites were the aforementioned "troubled-past-reminicing" and the hero's final insult to the beast during the climax.

Had this not been a made for TV movie, perhaps a more creative director could have done something visceral and carnage-ridden. The river-setting is rife will possibilites. It's made for TV premeir during shark week was exciting, but simply because I am one of those who is immediately attracted to any movie featuring a set of teeth, ESPECIALLY a sea creature,and ESPECIALLY a shark.

I suppose I should be thankful. After slogging through the SHARK ATTACK serious and countless direct-to-video sea thrillers, RED WATER comes as a kind of blessing. Gone is the blatant FLATNESS. Instead of just being a second-rate-studio churned out, by-the-numbers piece of sheep intestine, the makers of RED WATER seemed to have genuine interest in the project. Regardless of whether or not they failed, this pleases me.

If you seek River/shark horror, the best I can recommend is watching JAWS and ANACONDA back-to-back. If that doens't suit you (no reason it shouldn't) or you are simply a crazed shark-movie maniac, then check out RED WATER.

(By the way, the shark on the cover is obviously a great white, whereas the shark in this movie is a bull shi- AHEM... bull shark. Some shoddy marketing there, dontch'ya think?

Rating:
Summary: not bad
Review: when i heard about this movie i was very exited, i mean too many movies are about great whites (not like i didn't enjoy JAWS 5 stars!). but this one was about a bull shark. it only disapointed me a little. the shark looks pretty real by the plot is bad with the whole criminal, hostage situation deal. but then you add the terror sharks bring to peoples heart. if you thought the river was sfe, think again!