Ilsa - Harem Keeper of the Oil Sheiks

Rating:
Summary: Same old Ilsa!
Review: Once again Dyanne Thorne, the busty "She Wolf of the SS" is up to her old tricks (torture, S&M sex, bad acting). This time she's the harem keeper for a psycho oil sheik in some unkown Arab country. Let's get real, the "Ilsa" series main attraction is for Ms. Thorne to display her amazing body in tight fitting outfits and/or totally nude (although she is upstaged in that department by two athletic body guards who wrestle naked). On the plus side (if you're a guy), you get to feast your eyes on numerous naked women with truly standout figures. On the negative side, most of them get tortured in some idiotic plot involving spys, oil rights and a missing heir. The torture scenes were (I guess) an attempt at kink, but come off as just sick. The acting goes from campy to wooden, and the sex scenes (which must have been hot stuff back in the early 70's)are lame. All in all, be ready to use the 'fast forward' button.

Rating:
Summary: Same old Ilsa!
Review: Once again Dyanne Thorne, the busty "She Wolf of the SS" is up to her old tricks (torture, S&M sex, bad acting). This time she's the harem keeper for a psycho oil sheik in some unkown Arab country. Let's get real, the "Ilsa" series main attraction is for Ms. Thorne to display her amazing body in tight fitting outfits and/or totally nude (although she is upstaged in that department by two athletic body guards who wrestle naked). On the plus side (if you're a guy), you get to feast your eyes on numerous naked women with truly standout figures. On the negative side, most of them get tortured in some idiotic plot involving spys, oil rights and a missing heir. The torture scenes were (I guess) an attempt at kink, but come off as just sick. The acting goes from campy to wooden, and the sex scenes (which must have been hot stuff back in the early 70's)are lame. All in all, be ready to use the 'fast forward' button.

Rating:
Summary: That kooky Ilsa!
Review: The first film in the Ilsa series, "Ilsa: She-Wolf of the SS," stands as one of the most horrific exploitation films ever made. Seriously. Even I blanched over the atrocities depicted in the movie. Moreover, it's a rare bird as far as films go because it never loses its power to shock. In fact, I think the first Ilsa movie becomes even more disgusting with each subsequent viewing. Apparently, audiences flipped their cookies after seeing the movie at the drive-in. Word of mouth led to bigger ticket sales, which in turn led to thoughts about a possible sequel. If you've seen "She-Wolf," you know the idea of a sequel is laughable since Ilsa took a header at the end of the movie. But the wacky world of cinema knows no bounds when the scent of money is in the air, and even the demise of a primary character won't prevent Hollywood hacks from revisiting old ground. Remember the Bobby Ewing dream sequence imbroglio? If they can get away with something that outrageous, resurrecting the deceased Ilsa presents no problem at all. Thus a sequel to the first "Ilsa" film arrived on the scene in 1976 amidst great fanfare. Two other films would follow before the series ground to an ignominious end. Thanks to DVD, Ilsa has returned from the grave to haunt us once again.

"Ilsa, Harem Keeper of the Oil Sheiks" takes place somewhere in the Middle East quite a few years after World War II. This time around, star Dyanne Thorne isn't strutting around in a German uniform. Instead, she wears khaki garb in the service of the wealthy but morally depraved Sheik El Sharif (Victor Alexander). The oil wealth in this little kingdom gives the monarch plenty of time to indulge in decidedly unsavory activities, and it is Ilsa who serves as his main honcho. She procures the girls, develops the torture implements, and helps run a tight ship around the palace with the help of Velvet (Marilyn Joi) and Satin (Tanya Boyd), two scantily clad thugettes with some mean karate skills. The latest scheme cooked up by Ilsa and the sheik involves kidnapping several wealthy white women (one played by Uschi Digard) in order to make some money in a slavery racket. They figure they can sell these women to some of the powerful local sheiks and thus keep El Sharif's enemies pacified. But just as Ilsa's powerful appetites for men undid her in the first film, the same thing happens here when a spy named Commander Adam (Mark Thayer) of the U.S. Navy pops in to say hello.

Adam's ulterior goal is to infiltrate the sheik's palace and overthrow him so the western powers can gain control of the kingdom's plentiful oil supply. That the sheik has oil to spare is made abundantly clear when we see some of his goons douse a poor chap in the black stuff and light him up (I didn't think you could light oil this easily, but what do I know?). Anyway, Adam shows up with the Henry Kissinger-like diplomat Kaiser (Wolfgang Roehm) and sets about seducing the beautiful Ilsa. His assignment is a difficult one considering that Ilsa puts in a lot of time in the torture chamber coming up with delightfully horrific methods of execution. We see Ilsa preside over a hand liberated from a wrist, ants used to grim effect, eye gougings, and several other atrocities best left unmentioned here. She also spends a few minutes with the sheik laughing at the unfortunate wretch--a young kid who just happens to be the rightful heir to the throne--locked away in a greasy dungeon. The whole thing wraps up in a rather ham handed way as a violent coup involving lots of cheesy gunplay and explosions topples El Sharif. A dreadful twist awaits Ilsa at the end of the film, a fate she definitely deserves considering her penchant for absolute brutality and her inability to cast aside Adam even after his motivations become painfully clear.

If you saw "She-Wolf" and swore you would never watch another Ilsa film again, consider changing your mind. "Harem Keeper" is nowhere near as depraved as the first entry in the series. I know that's not saying much, but this movie is definitely tame in comparison. Most of the horrific activities occur off camera, and the ones we do see look rather cheesy thanks to mediocre special effects work. Thorne once again works wonders as the incredibly gorgeous Ilsa. For an actress who rarely rose above strictly B budget filmmaking, she sure knows how to give a character dimension. Ilsa can be seductive one minute and deadly dangerous the next; Thorne pulls it off believably and looks like she's having fun at the same time. Sadly, the rest of the cast turns in largely pedestrian performances. Mark Thayer couldn't deliver a convincing line if his life depended on it, and Henry Kissinger might want to consider suing Wolfgang Roehm for character defamation. Only Victor Alexander as El Sharif comes close to matching Thorne's onscreen antics. Serious film fanatics will probably enjoy Velvet and Satin the most, though. Didn't I see two characters eerily similar to them in a James Bond film?

Just like the "She-Wolf" DVD, "Harem Keeper" contains several intriguing supplements, the most important of which is a commentary with Thorne, director Don Edmonds, and minor co-star Howard Maurer. In my experience, it's rare to hear such a lively commentary track as this one. Most audio comments included on DVDs take the film very seriously, but here the participants seem to have a lot of fun snickering at the picture's obvious flaws. Fans of low budget cinematic crud simply must add the Ilsa films to their collections. Thanks, Anchor Bay!


Rating:
Summary: Not What I Expected !
Review: While I am glad to have this installment in my collection, it lacks the punch in the gut that Ilsa She Wolf Of The SS has! In this one Ilsa is oh so weak and the violence is minimal!Ilsa's two sidekicks steal the show and while it is worth owning, it does NOT live up to the controversial first installment! I myself would pay no heed to anyone else's review, but all I can say is unless you are collector like me you're gonna be dissappointed!

Rating:
Summary: Not What I Expected !
Review: While I am glad to have this installment in my collection, it lacks the punch in the gut that Ilsa She Wolf Of The SS has! In this one Ilsa is oh so weak and the violence is minimal!Ilsa's two sidekicks steal the show and while it is worth owning, it does NOT live up to the controversial first installment! I myself would pay no heed to anyone else's review, but all I can say is unless you are collector like me you're gonna be dissappointed!

Rating:
Summary: Fast forward review
Review: You would think that any Ilsa flick would have sexy sleaze potential, but there aren't really any keeper scenes here. It sounds good on paper, a bomb stuffed up a girl, but nothing really gets shown except fake blood spattering around. There's a chatisty belt scene that maybe rates a partial star (but is demoted due to excess hirsuteness), but that's about it. There's not even that much here for gore fans. Zero stars.