The Corpse Grinders

Rating:
Summary: Tender Vittles?
Review: "The Corpse Grinders" tells the tale of a near bankrupt cat food company that decides to cut costs by utilizing human corpses for their "premium blend" of kitty chow. Amazingly, this chow becomes a best seller, the only drawback being that once the felines have tasted human flesh they revert to a very primal state of maneateing. A doctor and his wife stumble across this plot and decide to investigate, which leads to various "horrific" conclusions. "The Corpse Grinders" can best be described as a ultra-low budget student film even though it is directed by the relatively prolific Ted V. Mikels. The acting, sets, sound and special effects are all very amatuerish. This does not detract from the film however as, if one takes it on this level, it is very fun and "campy". I truly enjoyed this film. The DVD presentation from Image is probably the best available. The source print has some damage and color saturation issues but for a low-budget film as this it seems unlikely that a better source material is available. The extras include director commentary which, unfortunately, I have yet to peruse, a very interesting still gallery that includes some shots from altered nude scenes and the theatrical trailer. The film is presented in a slight widescreen format 1.78:1. I would think that anyone who is a fan of "Blood Feast", "The Undertaker and His Pals" and "They Saved Hitler's Brain" will find themselves enjoying this film. Like the box says, I did not watch this with my cat!

Rating:
Summary: GOOD MOVIE AND EXCELLENT COMMENTARY
Review: First of all, the script and acting are OK, not great, but good enough. But what makes this flick worth seeing are the interesting characters: the lady with one leg, the retarded, funny looking janitor (Yes!, he gets a ride in the grinder.), the grave digger, and his loony wife with her doll that she thinks is her real kid. You see what I mean. The commentary by MIKELS is interesting. He certainly likes to do these things. The film footage, on the main menu, shows the corpse grinder in operation. Oh yes, the cats attacking their masters is stupid, but then that is part of the charm of this offering.

Rating:
Summary: Please Rent don't buy
Review: Horrible Horrible please don't buy. Not worth the time to tell you how bad this movie really is.

Rating:
Summary: wonderful and wacky cult flick
Review: This isn't for gore hounds but it is a treat for lovers of wacky cult cinema... and cat owners. The title and concept are great and this an enjoyably wacky little movie. The over-the-top poster on the DVD cover is a treat too. Not for everybody but a blast for those who "get" these types of things. I dug it. The commentary by Mikels is a delight!

Rating:
Summary: A slightly above average low-budget schlocker
Review: This Ted V Mikels drive-in classic is definately worth at least a one-time glance. There isn't very much gore (as in some Herschell Gordon Lewis Productions) nor is there a lot of sex (as in most Russ Myer films) but this film does have some interesting characters and a unique storyline. It seems that the people at the Lotus Cat Food Company are using human flesh in their product in order to boost sales and sales are definately booming for the food "For Cats Who Love People". Trouble begins to unfold when cats all over town start to turn on their owners (the "cat attack" scenes in this film are totally off the wall!). Meanwhile, a young doctor and his blonde nurse begin to investigate the Lotus Cat Food Company and uncover the ghastly truth. The plot takes a strange twist when the company owners start using live cadavers in their product as opposed to the dead bodies they usually dig up from fresh graves...definately a must see for lovers of cult cinema! This DVD version contains the original theatrical trailer, commentary by director Ted V Mikels, a "behind the scenes" photo gallery, a rare music video entitled "Immaculate Contraption" and some highly entertaining trailers for other Ted V Mikels films.

Rating:
Summary: A slightly above average low-budget schlocker
Review: This Ted V Mikels drive-in classic is definately worth at least a one-time glance. There isn't very much gore (as in some Herschell Gordon Lewis Productions) nor is there a lot of sex (as in most Russ Myer films) but this film does have some interesting characters and a unique storyline. It seems that the people at the Lotus Cat Food Company are using human flesh in their product in order to boost sales and sales are definately booming for the food "For Cats Who Love People". Trouble begins to unfold when cats all over town start to turn on their owners (the "cat attack" scenes in this film are totally off the wall!). Meanwhile, a young doctor and his blonde nurse begin to investigate the Lotus Cat Food Company and uncover the ghastly truth. The plot takes a strange twist when the company owners start using live cadavers in their product as opposed to the dead bodies they usually dig up from fresh graves...definately a must see for lovers of cult cinema! This DVD version contains the original theatrical trailer, commentary by director Ted V Mikels, a "behind the scenes" photo gallery, a rare music video entitled "Immaculate Contraption" and some highly entertaining trailers for other Ted V Mikels films.

Rating:
Summary: Ted V. Mikels Takes On The Pet Food Industry!
Review: Wow. That's all I can say after watching this, one of the silliest (and conceptually grossest) of all of Mikels' films. I am a true fan of bad movies, but I have mixed feelings on this one. On the one hand the director's commentary is very interesting, even though it's disturbing what he finds funny (no surprise there, I suppose...), and it is a fun movie to mock in a kind of 'Plan 9' way (The 'sets' of the hospital are amazingly realistic! Not!), certainly the plot is silly and fun to riff on. In essence we have a corrupt, near-bankrupt cat food magnate running the Lotus Cat Food Company who decides to cut costs by grinding up corpses, cadavers, and later his own victims. (That's a plus: it certainly beats 'downsizing'; laying off all your employees in the States and exporting their jobs overseas, as is all the managerial rage today.) The only problem is that once the cats taste human flesh, they return to their wild roots and attack their owners, killing them in the most hilarious 'attack' sequences you have ever seen. It is wonderful watching the people holding onto the killer cats for dear life, trying to keep them from running away while making it look like a life or death struggle. Eventually a doctor and nurse couple finds out what's going on and confronts the evil cat food magnate in the climactic scene.

So much for the good part. The bad part is that while very unrealistic, the movie was still gross, in a disgusting, dirty way. The repeated scene of the meat coming out of the meat grinder was not really especially gory, but it was used about a thousand times and got pretty tiresome. I like these nutty, cult movies, but I think Mikels has done better, and way more amusing, movies, such as "Girl in the Gold Boots". If you have seen that movie as well, you will note that several key people are in both movies, and in fact they were filmed in the same year.

Overall, I decided on three stars for boring gore and general amateurishness, although I debated about giving it four stars which is probably what it would deserve for most grade Z movie fans. The deciding factor, interestingly, was an extra on the DVD. The DVD has several extras including the director's commentary track, a filmography, behind the scenes pictures (don't expect too much), and a video 'tribute' to the movie by Bentmen called 'Immaculate Contraption'. I found 'Immaculate Contraption' to be the five most painful minutes of cinema viewing in my life. It was badly produced (and not in a campy, fun way), the music was wretched, and it was generally putrid. That became the tiebreaker and earned the film three stars instead of the four I originally intended. Save yourself the pain. 'Immaculate Contraption' is neither immaculate or a contraption, but it positively is rubbish.