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Out Cold

Out Cold

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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: This Should Sweep the Golden Raspberries
Review: ...
As a one-time fan of Lee Majors back when he was a TV star, I found it quite painful seeing him reduced to this. His character ends the movie in an upside-down porta-john stuck in a tree. I wish I could find something better about his role elsewhere in the movie, but I can't. He plays an unlikeable character who is never really an effective villain. He's out to remake an Alaska ski resort to make it a more classy place, while the employees there fight to preserve the place's more earthy roots. Don't get me wrong; I'm a fan of a good many irreverent farces, from the better Farrely Brothers movies to SAVING SILVERMAN to JAY AND SILENT BOB. But this movie just doesn't work. The jokes are often unfunny. And in addition to Majors being a lackluster villain, more of the protagonists than not are either not particularly likeable or such non-descript characters that we have trouble caring about them. This is a ski movie that goes downhill in several senses too many.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Out Cold indeed!
Review: A funny thing happened while I was at the movie theater watching "Out Cold" - the theater was empty. Here I was, sitting in the back row, wondering why no one would see a movie celebrating an all American winter sport. My queries were answered halfway through the movie. Where the famous saying goes "Don't believe everything you see on TV", comes this, "Don't believe everything you see in movie trailers". (Touchstone, you have really done it this time!)

Snowboarders beware! Whatever you have seen in the trailers depicting your favorite sport, rest assured they are all that you have seen as far as this movie goes. So to fill up the remaining 90 minutes, the Malloy Brothers and company have put together a messy sandwich of borrowed plot ideas. The ingredients are as follows:

- 1 Lee Majors as wealthy businessman coming to a snowy town to buy the entire town
- 5 warm-blooded "American Pie"-type males epitomizing young male stereotypes
-> 1 Jason London as handsome clean-cut hopeless romantic Rick
-> 1 Derek Hamilton as complete idiot Pigpen (Inspiration: Looney Tunes!)
-> 1 Zach Galifianakis as resident butt-of-all-the-slapstick-jokes Luke
-> 1 David Denman as ambiguously gay bartender Lance
-> 1 Flex Alexander as token African-American Anthony
- 3 stereotypically diverse women
-> 1 A.J. Cook as Jenny the jilted, lover of boys
-> 1 Caroline Dhavernas as Anna the engaged, the romantic snare
-> 1 Playboy playmate Victoria Silvstedt for sexual titillation
- 1 romance storyline straight from "Casablanca" involving Rick and Anna
- over 100 racy humor materials paralleling "Road Trip"
- several snowboarding scenes (by accomplished snoboarders) so that it will be promoted as a snowboarding movie

Mix them together. Never mind how, as long as they are mixed together.

That is exactly what "Out Cold" delivers. When the opening is presented by a scruffy-looking redneck-talking lunatic on the subject of a snowy mountainous town in Alaska founded by a flamboyant whacko who enjoys pulling his own pants down while skiing, it pretty much sets the tone for the rest of the movie. However, the choke full of comedy is not enough to eliminate the aftertaste of bad casting. Majors is clearly a fish out of water, he does not have a clue with his role. Though he makes a good effort calling the founder's son 'retard', which only goes to show he needs a foil character to play off. He can't do a scene on his own. Equally clueless is Silvstedt's turn as his stepdaugter from a Swede mother. Despite her actual Swedish background, she is spoofing her native accent for some strange reason. It would have been better off if her character was non-speaking. Dhavernas is a pain to watch. It is one thing to borrow an idea from "Casablanca", but to have an inexperienced actress reproduce Ingrid Bergman's role from that film is ludicrous. (Does anyone really believe that she is sorry for standing up Rick?!) It is a relief that London does not return ala Humphrey Bogart. Pigpen is a stinkbomb, Hamilton is a stinker. His role's only purpose is to play out his daydream of crashing into a cable car full of Solid Gold dancers. Other than that, he is plain irritating. Possibly the only good acting comes from Galifianakis, who sells every pranks and slapstick routines his character receives. A pity that he is surrounded by bad actors and a screenplay of borrowed plot ideas that do not mesh together.

To be absolutely clear, "Out Cold" is NOT about snowboarding. Nor is it about Major's attempted takeover of a quiet snowy town somewhere in Alaska. It is about making another silly movie, and one that feels Out Cold.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: You've got to be kidding
Review: Are you people serious? Is this what passes for comedy in todays sad world? This is by far one of the biggest abortions of a film...no, movie I've ever seen. To call it a film would be a slap in the face to an art form that I have such respect for and if you have any respect for the art of film than you will distance yourself from this dibacle. There's stupid comedies (Dumb and Dumber, Austin Powers) and then there's this. There are not enough adjetives in the english language to describe how bad this movie is. Please avoid this film like the plague and if you want to see a real comedy watch something like "Rushmore".

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: David
Review: Funny, funny, funny!!! I couldn't stop laughing. If you want a good laugh buy this movie, its GREAT!!!!!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Carpa Diem man seize the carp
Review: I first saw this movie around Feburary but I think I have watched it like 50 times since then. It is great. Pig Pen is the funniest character in the movie. The drug test scene is his best moment but he has many more. I thought it was great that the whole movie has a Casablanca feel to it but with an Animal House spin. There are many great characters and moments in this movie and you have to see it it is totally worth it. Don't go changing

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Lovin it strong!!!
Review: I have seen this movie well over 20 time and i still love it. One of the great stupid humor movies of my time. If u dont like this movie perhaps ou should take the large stick out of your a*s. Even my grandma loves it.... Id give it more than 5 stars if i could

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: best movie ever
Review: I LOVED this movie! Everything about it made me teary-eyed with laughter. The adlibs were great, the whole Ski-School-esque influence perfect, there's nothing I can say bad about this movie, except that it's not beaten out Titanic or Star Wars, and never will. GREAT fun, go see it a trillion times.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Zach Galifianakis
Review: I only viewed this because Zach Galifinakis is in it and hes like a great stand up comedian but this one really smells and the crude jokes just get bored after awhile. a few funny moments with Galifianakis safe this one. other wise strickly cold in the nut region

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: This is the best movie that was ever made ever!!!
Review: I really don't know what more I have to say about this movie than what my title already says. I grew up in the mountains of ski town Colorado and watched the overblown resort mentality trash and destroy my hometown. Somehow, this movie not only does an extremely accurate job of that, but is funny, and amazingly wellcast. I loved this movie. I watch it at least once a week and know ever line by heart. Skiers, snowboarders, and everyone who has never seen snow will love this movie. It is amazing!!!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: one of the funniest movies ive ever seen
Review: i saw the preivew for this movie in the theatres but i didnt get to see it but when i rented it i laughed my butt off one of the funniest parts is when everyone has to take a drug test ill let u find out why.


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