Rating: 
Summary: man's inhumanity... to man
Review: This movie is almost, but not quite, bad enough to be good. The Beast of Yucca Flats is easily more inept than anything Ed Wood ever did (and, appropriately, one of the stars of Yucca Flats is Tor Johnson, who is better known as one of the monsters in Wood's legendary Plan 9 From Outer Space). But even though the movie is less than an hour long, it's staggeringly boring for most of that time, with only a few enjoyably awful things to keep the attention of the bad movie fan. One is that no microphones were used to make the movie -- all the soundtrack is done by voice-over, even the dialogue. Francis narrates the movie in a grim, ponderous monotone, repeatedly making random comments involving the word "progress". The most hilarious of these comes when two young boys "not yet caught in the whirlwind of progress, feed soda pop to [some] thirsty pigs" (I am not making this up). Francis also has a fascination with parachuting (a subject he explored in his next film, "The Skydivers"), despite the fact that it has absolutely nothing to do with the plot. Another fun touch is that because of the lack of microphones, whenever characters do speak to one another the camera studiously avoids looking at their faces. But in general, this movie is a waste of time for anyone who isn't a very hard-core bad movie fan. You have been warned.
Rating:
Summary: Straight out of Eddiewood
Review: This movie is hilarious it's so bad! If you have trouble finding mistakes in Ed Wood movies-then this movie is a great primer. The movie begins with brief nudity and either a murder, a molestation or a rape-maybe even necrophilia--who can tell-but it has nothing at all to do with the rest of the movie. The dialogue is pratically non-existent-except for an over-the-top narration. Tor Johnson brandishes a giant club, while our hero cops take a girls pulse while carrying her--headed for a cliff that looks to be about ten feet high-where they are worried about falling hundreds of feet to their death. Watch this with friends for a great laugh-everyone can join in and miss nothing. Actually-picture yourself about ten or eleven years old and think--this is the movie you probably would have made!! The highlight is when one of our hero cops in an airplane shoots a father looking for his missing children with the motto-"Shoot first ask questions later" The nuclear test zone is a treat too-not a tree or bush is even slightly damaged-even though the blast has turned Tor into the "Beast"--too many mistakes to mention-but they're all unbelievably bad. This would be a great movie to show to your arty farty acquaintances who love movies like "Claire's Knee"
Rating: 
Summary: One of the worst ever
Review: This movie is so terrible it has a certain kind of charm. The entire soundtrack was either lost or never recorded so the whole thing is either narrated or voices are dubbed onto characters when their backs are to the camera (most shots of characters speaking appear to have been excised to hide the lost soundtrack so the editing is often choppy). Tor Johnson gives his most incompetent ever performance as "the beast" (an atomic blast has turned him into a lumbering killer). Several of his takes are obviously messed up - he has great difficulty getting out of an aeroplane for example - but the filmmmakers couldn't afford any re-takes. He lumbers through the desert at about 1mph waving a stick at everyone. A wrestling match he has with the police must be seen to be disbelieved. Amazing. Appears to have been cobbled together from half-of-a-finished-film.
Rating: 
Summary: This movie rocks!
Review: This movie was an absolute charm! It was thrilling and action-packed. The best part is that it is almost entirely narrated. If you like strange off-the-wall nuclear science-fiction, this movie was made for you!
Rating:
Summary: T-T-T-Tor!
Review: Tor Johnson's man-boobs star in this (adjective) movie. It opens with a naked lady puting on a towel, then being unconvincingly choked. I think the funniest part of this movie is when Tor Johnson arrives by plane, then tries to get out of said plane...cut to different scene...then Tor's out of the plane. I like that. Throughout the movie, I had one strong hope: As long as he never appears naked, I'll be fine...
He doesn't. AND, the movie's terrible, and I also like that. Anyone with a shred of heart will enjoy this. It's lovely.
Rating: 
Summary: Gorgeous DVD of poverty-stricken stinker
Review: Where does one begin in describing this movie? I must second all the other reviewer's comments on this one. Even fans of Ed Wood films will find their mouths dropping open in astonishment at the ineptness of this movie. Count how many ways they (hilariously) try to hide the fact that there's no synchronized sound; decide for yourself if Tor or the heroine is more hideous; thrill to the leaden pacing (even at 54 minutes, you'll be checking your watch); listen in horror as the narrator urges "our hero" to hunt down and kill an innocent man; imagine why the producers chose to open what is essentially a "kiddie matinee"-type movie with a rape/murder (??) featuring frontal nudity; and cringe at the same annoying stock music cues heard in numerous no-budget productions (Atomic Brain and Astounding She Monster leap to mind), recycled here once again. Cataloging this movie's deficiencies would take, well, about 54 minutes. But is it entertaining? Even though I tried to warn her off, my wife (whose tolerance for this sort of thing is not as highly developed as my own) sat in with me on this one, laughed hysterically throughout, and at one point, when I tactfully suggested she make her escape, declared,"No, I'm really enjoying this one." An unsolicited (and completely unexpected) testimonial. If you're a bad film fan you really owe it to yourself to see this one before you die.
The DVD presentation, spare though it is (no trailers, chapter stops only), still amounts to overkill in this case. The print used is pristine (as claimed on the DVD box). If you watch closely you will find some very light speckling and scratching here and there but otherwise the print's sharp and clean, with good tonal values and detail. Kind of compares to hanging some old stinky sneakers in the Louvre. A commentary would have been welcome (somebody has some 'splainin to do), not to mention a trailer or two, but just the fact that this rarely-seen movie (and I use the word loosely) has been preserved for future generations is reason enough to thank Image for showing the love. Four stars for the DVD, 1 or 5 for the movie, depending on your viewpoint.
Rating:
Summary: Definitely a bad film, but too boring to be much fun....
Review: Yawn. I love 'bad' monster movies, but this one is very dull. The DVD packaging suggests a color film. The actual film is black & white - so what, just fine with me. (I'm not picky with my Z-flicks...) What I am picky about is fun. As stupid & inept as this film is, I was too bored to laugh or even chuckle after the first 10 minutes. Boring images of a monster and his chasers running around in a drab hilly desert. With only scraps of narration and ho-hum music. Sounds dull? It really is, capturing none of the inspirational desert horror of 'Eegah!'. (Oh my 'Eegah!', still my vote for the 'Lawrence of Arabia' of awful monster/desert movies...)I never dreamed I would write this, but Tor Johnson's work in this film is sub-par in comparison with his loftier garbage-bag films for registered trash icon Ed Wood. Tor's Monster has no flimsy tombstones to knock over, no drugged Bela Lugosi to attack, no dialogue to destroy. Without Ed Wood's brave inept hand, Tor seems lost. 'The Beast of Yucca Flats' is boring. A dull film with almost no sound is about as worthwhile as a kid's home movie. You wouldn't watch that, and you shouldn't buy this.
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