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Barbarella

Barbarella

List Price: $14.99
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Rating: 4 stars
Summary: sexy cult gem
Review: BARBARELLA is one of a few cult films that can be called a "Holy Grail" of cultdom. Jane Fonda's titillating sci-fi adventure is an endless, trippy delight.

Barbarella is a futuristic girl from Earth who is called on to retrieve Duran-Duran, a noted scientist, from the evil planet of SoGo. On her perilous (and quite sexy) journey she teams with blind angel Pygar (John Phillip Law), and battles the Black Queen (Anita Pallenberg) along with various sexual torture devices.

The film is hilarious, from the Black Queen's catch-cry of "pretty pretty pretty" to the hoard of evil children with what look like rabid Cabbage Patch dolls. Barbarella's anti-gravity striptease during the opening credits is a hoot, too.

BARBARELLA was directed by Roger Vadim (then the husband of Jane Fonda), and is full of vintage 60's retro influence.

The DVD also includes the trailer.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Move over, Plan 9! Here is the true camp classic.
Review: This movie is so irredeemably awful that I almost couldn't bear to watch it three times. If you have ever watched Plan 9 from Outer Space, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, or MST3K, you are in for a treat.

Imagine a distant future in which the universe is run according to a campy combination of 1960's political correctness and 1960's masturbatory fantasies. Now imagine Jane Fonda as Barbarella, rocketing through this universe in her groovy shag-carpeted spaceship, getting into all kinds of scrapes and rewarding the men who save her in her own special way. Just remember that this is eye- and brain-candy; if you try to make sense of any of it, the Matmos will suck your brain out.

This is especially a must-have if you want to see Jane Fonda taken down a notch, and what sentient being doesn't?

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Fantastic!!! My Pretty, Pretty
Review: Great movie from the biting dolls of the lake to the nasty matmoss. A classic that all Sci-Fi ers that don't attend Trek conventions would love. I must adjust my tongue box.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Barbarella Psychadella
Review: This film, along with other stunning classics such as "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls," are sure proof that the age of really, really bad yet good films is behind us. Set in the 41st Century, the hypersexual Barbarella goes in search of the evil renegade scientist Duran Duran and manages to stumble across what must be the grooviest planet this side of "Vegas in Space." In her quest to find Duran Duran ("Pardon me, but do you know Duran Duran?"), Barbarella manages to shag half the planet and pique the prurient interest of the evil, yet uber-sensual bisexual queen ("hello, my pretty, pretty"). After demolishing the amazing Orgasmatron and getting herself locked into the queen's funky chamber of dreams, Barbarella saves the day with a bubble of goodness and some help from her blind angel friend Pygor. The unbelievably bad acting in this film is very well counterbalanced by the fabulous Pucciesque fun fur sets and amazing special effects (i.e. Everytime Barbarella has an orgasm her hair instantaneously perms itself!) It's impossible, given our current climate of cynicism, to produce good quality camp like this today. All attempts to reproduce a movie this overwhelmingly bad would just have to fail. Yet, I cannot recommend this film highly enough - run, do not walk, to see it.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: HOW COOL!
Review: This spine-tingling inter-galactic adventure of the Queen of deprived sexual instinct is a long time favorite of illegal migrant farm workers in the US southwest. Baffled by the concept of physical pleasure, clueless, careless, and Vadimized beyond belief, our acquiescent heroine plies her considerable gifts to save the universe from forces evil. The cheesey special effects are drop-dead perfect, even by contemporary standards. What would you change? The sadistic skating dolls of Satan are glorious. I started shouting Hosanna's right away. Funny, campy, sexy, and visually stunning. Obviously French. Delisciously decadent. I hope it gets re-made soon. High camp as no other. Underated fun. Great chick film. (See, they get mad if you put in straight porn, but disguised as "Art", well, you're in like flint!)

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Great movie
Review: This movie has everything you could ever want: sex, love, nudity, action, bad acting, and it's set in a futuristic back ground. It's got something for everyone, also. For the guys, there is Jane Fonda half naked for about 1/4th of the movie, and for the girls, she changes her outfit about 300 times (not to mention the cute blind angel). Oh and here's an interesting tidbit for those of you who don't know, this movie is where the band Duran-Duran got there name. Go out and rent it tonight, I almost gaurentee if you like bad movies you'll love this one.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: More than just sexy, this is a feminist political statement.
Review: Most people who see this film have entirely missed the point. Many think this is a betrayal of the values of feminisim.. On the contrary... This film is a reaction to the sexist "boy's club" that was the space program in the 1960s. It was believed that females were incompatible with space missions because their sexuality would distract the men on board and screw up the quest for knowledge. This movie makes fun, to an extreme, of that ridiculous notion. By using her sexuality overtly, Barbarella means not to objectify herself but to boldly thumb her nose at the sexism inherent in the space program (as well as many other industries) of the 1960s.

With that in mind it is both a hilarious and meaningful film, however silly it may be.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Barbarella On DVD? Amazing!
Review: Well, I finally did it! I got "Barbarella" on DVD! And wow...what can I say? I definitely should not have waited. The picture quality is amazing and sooo much better than the video I had. I was amazed at the clarity of it, it was almost like watching a different movie (but, come on now, can "Barbarella" really be mistaken for anything else?).

You also get the classic trailer with this DVD. So it's very much worth your time and money! Plus...along with Barbarella, you get the foxy and vivacious Great Tyrant! Ooh! ;)

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: The True Meaning of Barbarella, or The End of Women's Lib
Review: Barbarella is an elegant Soft-Porn Sci-Fi Flick which consists of 4 sex scenes (dependant upon your definition of sex) interspersed with dressing, undressing, and tearing off clothes. The alleged plot has only one True Hero, Angel Pygar, who is otherwise a non-participant. For plot, there are so-called heroes, apparently named after sex toys, revolting against against a Lesbian Tyrant Queen. They mercifully perish. Pompous Vilain Duran-Duran is so stuffy & pompous as to make him harmless, even if he were to suceed, and despite his worst intententions. Director Vadim, then Fonda's Husband is flagrantly showing her so as to say "This is What I keep in MY BED!.

However, despite being a mindles Sexploitive T&A flick, This movie has REDEEMING QUALITIES if viewed on a deeper level, that is, what Fonda & Vadim say through Barbarella about the Women's Liberation Movement throught the four episodes of sex:

Sex Scene #1 - Barbarella hitches a ride to town with the local Male Baby Sitter at the cost of a Hot Sweaty Afternoon of Passion. The Iceboat goes Round & Round to the tune of "What's New Pussycat". No vows of Celebacy are being kept here! Loverboy is unsophisticated (doesn't know what the Sex Pill is for), crude, but charming. Mutual Sexploitation nets Barbarella new clothes and a ride to town. Barbarella lustfully rises/sinks to the task at hand. Some would use the nasty word "Prostitution" to describe what happened. Of course, these Ladies of the night are always criticized for betraying the NOW cause. Worse/Better is to come!

Sex Scene #2 - Barbarella cheers Pygar the Angel so he can fly again. In addition to the issues of Sex Scene #1, we find that Pygar is of a different SPECIES, the last of his kind. Some would use the ugly word "Beastiality" to describe this. I am going to be generous and treat Barbarella as Female Sexual Predator who uses Sexploitation to take advantage of a man of different RACE in a Moment of Weakness. Isn't the Women's Movement against Sexploitation of anybody?

Sex Scene #3 - The Sex Pill. An attempt to be kinky that mercifully fails. Instead, it is silly. It would be more palatable, however, to the Women's Movement to use the Great Lesbian Tyrant instead of that Stooge of a "Good Guy" Revolutionary.

Sex Scene #4 - Death by Orgasm. Duran-Duran puts Barbarella into the Orgasmatron, the Ultimate Sex Toy, to drive her beyond her tolerance level of Pleasure & Shame, and to remove her clothes. Barbarella's Pleasure Tolerance is off-scale, and her sense of shame is non-existant. When the "Killer Orgasm" occurs, the machie overheats & shorts. Allegorically, does this mean that Fonda & Vadim enjoys betraying the Women's Movement so much and with so little Shame that they WANT Women's Lib to Short-Out? What was Vadim thinking here? Any SELF-RESPECTING LIBERATED WIFE would have BOBBITIZED him for that!

The Finale, Angel Pygar rescuing TWO LOVELY LUMPS of Femininity, flying off into the Sunset with his GIRLS (Two Girls!) is better than what any Male Chauvinist Pig Dare Dream! OINK! OINK!

In view of the Fonda track record, and after this intensive reproductive activity of Barbarella, a Pregnancy is practically eminent. The movie ends before this is known; however , it brings up the issue of how Barbarella would deal with it. In light of Fonda's exercise Video, I expect a betrayal of the Pro-Choice Movement by opting for LaMaze over Abortion.

Viewed on a deeper level of the Fonda-Vadim view of Women's Lib, this Shameless T & A Flick gains stature as the Ultimate Betrayal of Women's Liberation, raising it to the level of One of the Greatest Films of All Time!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Fonda Fan
Review: Quite possibly the campiest film ever made. It's great, especially the beginning. The movie is just great. It's funny, the acting is funny, Jane Fonda is great; Anita Pallenberg is great. A must see. SEE IT!


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