Rating: 
Summary: Some one please kill me!
Review: "some one please kill me" was what i was thinking during the film in the middle of the film and at the end. I really couldnt be bothered to watch the end it was so bad i was just pointing out all the mistakes in the movie i dont count this as a film because most films have a plot. Anyway what im trying to say is that my step mothers funeral was more interesting than this film
Rating:
Summary: apallingly appalling
Review: This film could really be summed up in one word "Appalling". Van Diesel plays the archetypical 'action hero.' Yeah you've got it, the one whose status is big muscles and has 'I can't act' written all over his face! The trailer for the film looked absolutely awesome, which is the only 30 seconds worth watching for the entire film.I would love to explain in depth the details of the plot, but quite frankly I was too busy laughing at how pathetically shallow the plot was to even remember it. If you are a Samual L Jackson fan don't torture yourself by sitting through the film, not even the master himself can do it any justice whatsoever. Nevertheless as taste is unaccountable I can only recommend you rent this film from your local video rental store or whomever!
Rating:
Summary: Viewer from Louisiana
Review: Read great reviews for this movie, couldn't wait to buy it when it came out. Enjoy watching action adventure flicks, thought this one would be right up there. Have yet to finish it, bad acting, campy scenes, & ludacris dialogue, put me to sleep both times i tried to watch it, not sure what the plot is supposed to be anymore, if it has one. Rent it before you buy. Seeing it once, if you make it through, may be enough.
Rating:
Summary: Absolutely wretched!!!
Review: This is certainly one of the worst movies I've had the unfortunate opportunity of viewing...and the two friends that viewed it with me completely agree. Don't get me wrong: I'm not some romanticist who thinks Casablanca is the greatest film ever. I'm just a regular 20 year old college student who actually enjoys QUALITY action films such as the Rambo trilogy, the Terminator films, Con Air, Independence Day, etc. This movie falls far short. The movie was so mind-numbing that I actually didn't care how it ended...I just wanted it to end, the sooner, the better. I cannot comprehend how someone can enjoy such a weak movie...the action sequences were autrocious and ridiculous (besides the openning scene, which was decent), the acting was horrible (c'mon -- "I live for this s@#$t" -- are you kidding me), and, like I said, the script was completely nonsensicle. I was actually laughing at scenes that were supposed to be serious and "spellbinding." Please ignore the favorable reviews of this movie. These unfortunate viewers are clearly deprived of quality action films and need to go back and look at the pre-1997 action genre.
Rating: 
Summary: Don't miss this scene
Review: I'm lucky enough to say that I didn't buy this one, but I suppose its worth a rent just to see this one scene: XXX and his end of movie bimbo (al la James Bond) are making out and are interrupted by 'M' or whatever the head honcho in the XXX universe is called. They of course ignore the call, but 'M' says that he knows that they are there because he can see them on satellite. Now get this... XXX and his bimbo frantically look all around as if they are going to see where the mysterious satellite has been hiding the whole time. Hilarious!
Rating: 
Summary: wee
Review: entertaining. somethin you can get a good laugh out of with your friends. people quit looking for substance in movies. funny dialogue (not always meant to be) + people with funny accents + motorcycles defying gravity by jumping over buildings/fences/people + vin diesel = fun
Rating: 
Summary: All the fun and action no mush
Review: This movie is like a study of Bond and Bourn "The Bourne Identity (TV Miniseries) (1988)", action movies. Toss in the innocent enthusiasm as in "If Looks Could Kill (1991)", There are gadgets women plots and sub plots. But this movie is mostly about action. This is not one of those thinking movies or realy a talkie. It does hold your attention.
Xander Cage is an innocent dissident minding his own business. The business being stealing the governor's car and displaying reckless abandonment all in the cause of freedom. He is pressed into serves ala "Remo Williams - The Adventure Begins (1985)" in lieu of a prison sentence. It seems that the NSA needs someone of his reputation and abilities for short time. Will he comply and if so how short of a time? Will he quit when he is told to do so? And is there a love interest or just one of those spy vs. spy things?
Rating:
Summary: Triple Ridiculous!!
Review: This movie is what the outcome would of been if MTV's "Extreme Sports" had been given a big budget and had thrown in some throwaway plot device. This movie does have some of the usual spy movie things that everyone is accustomed too. There are girls, fast cars, chases, weapons, gadgets, explosions, and all of that. What it doesn't have is charm, emotion, fear, humor, character, or soul. It is completely empty. This is not Bond, and they are trying hard not to be. What a shame. Even though the deisgn of the end credits is obviously a rip-off of Bond's opening credit sequences. Vin Diesel may have the braun to be an action hero, but he doesn't have the talent or personality to make it worthwhile. A bit of that later. The movie was directed with hammy, over the top style by Rob Cohen, who directed Vin in "The Fast And The Furious". The movie starts off with a Bond like character getting shot while in the middle of a rave. Very unsubtle and ridiculous. Thus begins the movie. Vin plays Xander Cage. His name is the only thing I like about this movie. He is an extreme sports enthusiast who videotapes all of his escapades. His introduction is one of them, and it's meaningless and pointless. He is recruited by a national security agency under the watch of Augustus Gibbons(Samuel L. Jackson). Why Jackson took a nothing role with bad make-up and wig is beyond me. The agency has picked Xander as a new recruit to go and stop a villain named Yuri from destroying the city of Prague with a biological weapon. In the process, he gets involved with the man and falls for his lady Elena, who is played by Asia Argento. She is pretty and alluring in an odd, tough kind of way. Basically, there is no need for a plot when the only thing this film tries to do is to set up big action pieces that, most of the time, are not very well structured and seemed to be set up just for the sake of having something exciting happen. Many stunts and action pieces are so over the top that they are laughable. They made the movie as if they were taking it seriously, but you can't take this thing seriously. Obviously, they think that bigger muscles and action that is kicked up several gears makes for a better movie and a better secret agent. Wrong. It's just over the top and beyond anything remotely plausible. Not that it has to be plausible. This is a mindless action film, and you are not going to get reality, but one would prefer some stuff that is not so gigantic that it leaves you with no feeling at all. Later Bind films have kicked up the action, and some are hard to believe, but it has a more fantasy laced feel to it, and it feels like it fits. This one tries to be real, but it's as fake and cartoony as it gets. The humor is unbearable. They tried to do the Bond quips, and they fail horribly. They came too quick and there were too many early on. It doesn't help that Diesel had an awful delivery and showcased no comedic talent whatsoever to deliver those lines. Actually, all of the dialogue was quite limp and uninspired. Diesel seems like a decent guy in real life, but he can't act his way out of a paper bag. He comes across as a monotone, wooden neanderthal with no charisma or personality. You can't root for him in the film because he doesn't bring any kind of feeling in his character that would make you care if he died or lived. Same with Argento. But, he has muscles, and to some people that means talent. It just means he can flex his arm. We can all do that. He is the same thing in every movie. I wanted to get into the movie. I really did. It was just a hard, cold, unfeeling film that left you with nothing but 2 hours wasted. It's a film and a character that will long be forgotten from your memory by the time you get up from your seat. We need a secret agent who has been around the block. We need a character with feeling and passion. Not a dude who gets his kicks of driving cars off bridges and filming it just for kicks. 007, you have nothing to worry about.
Rating:
Summary: Funny for Czechs in Prague ... :-)
Review: Some of us remember the restrictions in the inner Prague, when XXX-ing here. They've re-built the bridges - but a fact to remember was that a stunt - making the on-the-parachute scene - has been killed, crashing one of the bridges.
Nevertheless - the movie is funny, especially because of those discrepancies (castle-village-city, where's what ... :-).
Another similar distortion-offering pics made over here:
1. BLADE-II - juicy!
2. Bourne Identity - chuckling with those all-over-Europe caught scenes, made in my own street ... :-) Welcome To The Pleasuredome, Frankie would say ... :-)
Rating:
Summary: Completely Entertaining!
Review: This movie uses every single clichéd trick in Hollywood...and uses them better than some of the movies that started them! No, this isn't a thought-provocking movie that will strive to change the world; it's two-hours of awesome special effect scenes and pure, empty-minded pleasure. Who cares if this script wasn't filled with brillant dialogue? The screenwriter, director, actors and audiences sure don't. Sure, the plot's predictable: bad guy trying to destroy the world, good guy trying to save the world and get the girl, good guy succeeds. But are you entertained while you watch the predictable scenes wizz by in a lot of action? Damn straight. If you want to sit down and watch an enjoyable movie, here's one for your collection.
|
