Rating: 
Summary: An endurance test for those with "special" tastes
Review: I can not imagine how anyone could sit though a screening of this one without an MST-filter. Honestly - people who claim that "Plan 9 From Outer Space" is the worst movie ever made are dilettantes. They simply do not KNOW the depths below Ed Wood that this movie, and the other "films" made by Coleman Francis, reach. If I had only two hours left to live, this opus would help make those 120 minutes SEEM like an eternity. It's really hard to convey how LONG you feel you've been sitting there - time stands still while you are subjected to a totally incomprehensible mishmash. Highlights include "willowy" John Carradine "singing" ("croaking" would be a more accurate description) the title tune "Night Train to Mondo Fine" (an experience that will reverbrate through your conciousness the way certain meals visit you for hours after consumption), a trip to a Cuba that seems to be in the middle of a lake and is ruled by a Castro with an obvious fake beard, neck-snapping edits that leave any hope of following the plot in the dust, and a finale that leaves you wondering if you have actually seen a movie or somehow inadvertantly ingested some bizarre hallucinogen and are only now coming back to consciousness. Try to imagine the high production values of "Carnival of Souls" blended with the comedic talents of J. Edgar Hoover, all washed with the sunny visions of a Cornell Woolrich on downers. Nahhhh, it just isn't possible to describe. THIS one has to be seen to be believed. My biggest regret - you don't get a medal to wear that says, "I sat through ALL of "RED ZONE CUBA" and lived to tell the tale!!" My friends, those of you that can actually accomplish that feat will have done something that you can brag about for the rest oif your life.
Rating: 
Summary: Another great episode from Best Brains Inc.
Review: This episode stars Coleman Francis, the Joe Don Baker of the 60's. The person who edited this movie must have been high on crack or something. I had no idea what was going on. The host segments are great. Mike assumes the identity of Carol Channing. At the end they sing a great tune: A Happy Upbeat Song. Get this movie OR ELSE
Rating:
Summary: Two Words: Coleman Francis
Review: An absolutley stupefying movie that almost broke Mike and the Bots. All of the usual Coleman Francis motifs are here: death, misery, death, coffee, death, pain, death, planes, death, no plot, and death. Coleman himself stars with his partner in crime, Tony Cardoza, that starts out with a revolution in Cuba and somehow or another ends up at a tungsten mine. Francis makes any Ed Wood movie look positively ingenious. Trust me, you have to see it to believe, but don't operate heavy machinery after watching.
Rating:
Summary: Cherokee Jack?
Review: One of the best MST3K episodes ever - it is Mike's MANOS. The thing even inspired us to write a musical version. Where will you spend eternity?
Rating:
Summary: Oh No! You ran over my dog!
Review: This has got to be one of THE best MST3k poke-funners. Red Zone Cuba itself is horrible, but the three boys in the satellite of love make it worth watching. END
Rating:
Summary: This is the one to buy
Review: Red Zone Cuba is one of the most dreadful movies ever made. Mike, Crow and Tom Servo are at their best in picking apart every absurd detail. END
Rating:
Summary: CURLY HOWARD IS THE FUGITIVE!
Review: Never was there a movie more deserving of the MST treatment. The best MST3K episode ever produce, bar-none!! END
Rating:
Summary: An endurance test for those with "special" tastes
Review: I can not imagine how anyone could sit though a screening of this one without an MST-filter. Honestly - people who claim that "Plan 9 From Outer Space" is the worst movie ever made are dilettantes. They simply do not KNOW the depths below Ed Wood that this movie, and the other "films" made by Coleman Francis, reach. If I had only two hours left to live, this opus would help make those 120 minutes SEEM like an eternity. It's really hard to convey how LONG you feel you've been sitting there - time stands still while you are subjected to a totally incomprehensible mishmash. Highlights include "willowy" John Carradine "singing" ("croaking" would be a more accurate description) the title tune "Night Train to Mondo Fine" (an experience that will reverbrate through your conciousness the way certain meals visit you for hours after consumption), a trip to a Cuba that seems to be in the middle of a lake and is ruled by a Castro with an obvious fake beard, neck-snapping edits that leave any hope of following the plot in the dust, and a finale that leaves you wondering if you have actually seen a movie or somehow inadvertantly ingested some bizarre hallucinogen and are only now coming back to consciousness. Try to imagine the high production values of "Carnival of Souls" blended with the comedic talents of J. Edgar Hoover, all washed with the sunny visions of a Cornell Woolrich on downers. Nahhhh, it just isn't possible to describe. THIS one has to be seen to be believed. My biggest regret - you don't get a medal to wear that says, "I sat through ALL of "RED ZONE CUBA" and lived to tell the tale!!" My friends, those of you that can actually accomplish that feat will have done something that you can brag about for the rest oif your life.
Rating: 
Summary: Film-making with blunt instruments
Review: Devotees of Coleman Francis (we know who you are -- we have the names) will know that not all of his films benefitted from "synched" sound. Watch "Beast from Yucca Flat" carefully, and you'll see that all the dialgue is "looped", or recorded after the fact. Sync sound brings a new dimension of awfullness to this work. Coleman and the cast mumble and stumble through their lines; if you turn your TV up to the threshold of pain, you might pick up some extra nuances from the soundtrack, but I doubt it. The skill of the sound department is more than matched by the cinematography. The film appears to have been run through an airport x-ray machine several dozen times (no doubt looking for WMD.) Black and white is pretty forgiving, but not of gross incompetence. Anyhow, as with "Wild World of Batwoman", don't try to figure out -- just open the wine, and let the waves wash over you as you laugh out loud. Rest assured that Mike and the 'bots give it the full treatment, each insult richly deserved.
Rating:
Summary: "I Had to Finish Smoking Before I Could Laugh"
Review: If you have never seen Mystery Science Theater 3000 this is the one to start with. Everything just clicks in this episode. The wonderfully bad Coleman Francis film makes perfect fodder for Mike and the bots. From the opening tones of the John Carradine sung theme, to the last Beast-of-Yucca-Flats-like helicopter rundown at the end, Red Zone Cuba is a riot. When Mike and the bots start making Curly of the 3 Stooges references at Coleman, through the inept guerilla training sequences, to the invasion of Cuba.....this is just one of the funniest episodes of the show. I know some folks get caught up in the Joel vs. Mike, or Comedy Central vs. Sci-Fi thing....who cares? This one-of-a-kind show is sorely missed in today's reality TV/King of Queens/According to Jim world, and no matter which episode you pop in you are guaranteed a good laugh with MST3K. Red Zone Cuba, for me just tops the list.
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