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Star Wars - Episode I, The Phantom Menace (Full Screen Edition)

Star Wars - Episode I, The Phantom Menace (Full Screen Edition)

List Price: $19.98
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Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Lucas must have needed money
Review: This movie was terrible. It has no right to have "Star Wars" anywhere in the title. Bad writing, bad characters and a bad move by Lucas to put out this sesame-street-meets-FlashGordon garbage.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Amazing!
Review: Every year I come up with my top five movies of that year. I was going to stop doing this after 1998. But after I saw The Phantom Menace I just had to continue. I am not a SW fan, actually as far as I am concerned it is nothing but a western set in space. The only reason I ened up watching the Phatom Menace was due to bordom on a Sunday afternoon during 1999. And what an afternoon it was! This movie absolutely blew my mind! Instead of getting a cheesy movie riddled with sensless fighting, one dimensional characters and a transparent plot. I got a movie with fleshed out characters and a complex plot (it took me 3 viewings to figure out the reason for the trade war). Jar Jar Binks was annyoing but everyone compensates for that big time-especially Natalie Portman who I tip my hat to. If the acting had not been so strong in this film I would have been on the floor laughing at the diologue. Unfortunetly some of the criticism of this movie have been the fact that the movie was "too wordy", and that it may be cut in the subsequent films, which will be really sad. But in the meantime I tip my hat to George Lucas and Co. for giving me one of the most enjoyable movies I have seen in long time.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: A lot here to love, a lot here to hate.
Review: There are a few problems with Phantom Menace. Big problems.

There is also a lot to love, scenes, music, and feelings that conjure up the grandeur of the original star wars movies. Here is my list of things to love, and things to hate.

Love: 1)The lightsaber duels. This must be what George had in mind, awesome in scale, grandiose in design, with incredible music. 2)Palpatine's rise. Can't they see how evil this guy is!! really well thought out, and you don't catch it on the first viewing. 3)qui gonn and obi-wan. This relationship is meaningful, and qui gonn is the perfect stalwart, dedicated, but not very imaginative jedi whose initial errors in judgment start things down the wrong side. 4)coruscant. The entire planet, with the senate, fantastic.

Things to hate: 1)jar jar, and the entire gungan race. Cartoonish, terribly done, and absolutely out of place. More so than the ewoks. 2)the midichlorian theme. Makes no sense, and even worse, explains what should never be explained. 3)yoda: why does he look like so bad? He looked way better in the first trilogy. 4)dialogue, "this is tense", "he's a dun, and a particulary nasty dun" (from a five year old), "exsqueeze me", etc. 5)grass. Grass should never appear in a star wars movie, either dirt, cities, or sand should appear.

And that's that. Overall, about an hour and ten minutes of great movie, fifty minutes of garbage.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: This was supposed to be an EPIC....a SAGA
Review: Okay, I saw the previews for this movie quite a few times. A saw the scene previews on MTV. All of them looked incredible, the effects and the scale of the movie looked outstanding. This was going to be a movie where you went in, and came out and went "Oh my god, that was the coolest thing I've ever seen."

That said, the film doesn't do that. It's supposed to be an epic story, a saga. A very rich story like it is in the original Star Wars. It should have been as powerful as those, but with modern effects and an enourmous budget.

Instead, the thing is FULL of corny lines. Jar Jar Binks is the worst addition to the saga EVER. He is there only as an appeal to young kids. It's so blatently obvious that it's embarrasing to watch. I'm 15, and I've been a Star Wars fan for a long, long time. I read all the books and really got in to it. When the next episode finally came out, I was hopeing to see it be amazing. I wanted to go in and come out with the reaction I said above. Instead I came out and said, "Heh, that was kinda dumb." Seeing a dumb character step in poo (twice) and say things like exqueeze me is NOT Star Wars. Nor is watching little kids accidently blow up a ship by accidently flying into it, while saying things like "Whoa, this is tense!" That is NOT Star Wars, that's corny and really, really shallow wrighting.

Bottom line, this movie should have been extraordinary. The fans who waited in line to see this for days didn't come to see Jar Jar or Anakin be dumb and cute. They came to see Star Wars. This stuff is really a dissapointment.

But, I gave it three stars because the music is outstanding and the battles and all the effects are increadible. The Droids vs. the Gungans was really cool, but it's ruined by making Jar Jar (who has no clue what he's doing...how is he a general? IT MAKES NO SENSE) accidently kill some driods by accidently letting loose the Gungan's bombs. The Pod race was SUPERBLY done. The three-way lightsaber battle was EXCEPTIONAL. This stuff IS star wars. The Jedi council, the senate and that stuff was good too. These things manage to save the movie, but not enough. We can only hope that the next one will be a better movie.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: BURTT, BRACKETT, McQUARRIE, TIPPETT; that's the ticket
Review: I am going to write about something that I do not know if many others have written about, and that is the sonic/aural dimension of these films. Absolutely unbelievable. To me, this is the true achievement of the Star Wars trilogy-- and it was with great pleasure that I watched the first five minutes of PHANTOM MENACE and was treated to the turbine engines of that funky space-cruiser and the wicked little explosion in the space hanger. Seriously, I believe it is this truly artistic element of Star Wars that seperates it from all other competition in fantasy films-- and I mean any fantasy films, period. David Lynch is equally as cool but in a completely different way (Dune).

That having been said, this film was a sheer horror. I would like just to remember the magisterial effects and sound design and conjure up this stumulii while reading some great sci-fi. And sci-fi this barely qualifies as. Empire is a GREAT film, for reasons that so many people have said, but also because it is fused with the brilliant writing of Brackett and Kasdan. It is one of the rarest of creative endeavors, where this confluence of elements gelled. The Phantom Menace was just so depressing to watch. I think the Mitichlorean/Force issue sums up everthing that is wrong about its message. Shame on you George. And don't get me started on those "special editions." How embarassing. For anyone who wants to know who the true geniuses are behind the Star Wars films, they are BEN BURTT, LEIGH BRACKETT, RALPH McQUARRIE, PHIL TIPPETT, and the legions of people who worked to make them ART, all of whom obviously have a much greater appreciation of what this term means is than George does.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Padme Needs a new Hairdresser!
Review: Padme really needs a new hairdresser. In certain scenes, her hair looks like a paint brush. Obi-Wan has problems, and a really heavy Scottish accent... "Blast us into oblivion", if anyone who has seen the movie remembers that scene, they'll know what I'm talking about. The boy who plays Anakin can't act at all. He is a really annoying brat! They should have used Hayley Joel Osmond from 'The Sixth Sense'. There is no blood in this movie like in the original trilogy...and almost no concept to the story. It is not developed fully.

~White Bird

P.S. What did they do to Obi-Wan in Episode II? He looks 45 years old!

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Episode I
Review: ITS IT LOOKS LIKE STAR WARS, IT FEELS LIKE STAR WARS, IT IS STAR WARS. JUST WATCH IT AND YOUR EYES GET LARGER AND LARGER TRYING TO TAKE IT ALL IN. IT HAS THE BEST LIGHTSABER ACTION EVER, AND FITS RIGHT IN AS A GREAT INTRODUCTION TO THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE. IT DOESNT NEED A MASSIVE TWISTING PLOT. ITS ONLY THE BEGINNING TO THIS WONDERFUL SAGA.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: ok..........................................................
Review: this movie is really cheesy i really can't believe people camed out side just to see this stupid movie!i thought the acting was horrible.and i didn't understand the story bord.the first three star wars were alot more action packed exciting and made sense!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Great FX
Review: A friend of mine once told me, opinions are like a-holes: everyone's got one, and some are stinkier than others. Please note the fact that there are over 1300 reviews on this movie. Like Sean Connery said in Finding Forrester, idiots who don't have the imagination or talent to write a book (or a movie), take a few minutes to cut someone else's work down. The sad fact is, every single person who said this movie was bad could probably write the script for their own flick. And you know what? The only people who would go watch it are their buddies they play AD&D with.

It's too bad George Lucas had to add Jar Jar into the story. Because he knew they needed some comic relief, as well as a broader range of appeal. It's too bad Natalie speaks in a monotone when dressed as the queen. Oh, sorry... Have you ever listened to Clinton or GW Bush? Not much better, folks. I miss Han Solo as much as anyone, but you can't have the same character types in every movie doing the same thing over. Too much politics? How do we develop a back story? I'm really curious as to what everyone was expecting? Three hours of gold bikini-clad babes, interspersed with light saber duels with no point to them? Too many people don't want to acknowlede that there's a whole story being set up here.

The fact of the matter is, this is a good movie. I would have liked to have seen more of the Naboo fighters/Droid fighters battle scene, but that's the way it goes. And for all you geniuses that think you can write a better movie than George, why don't you start submitting your own award winning scripts to Hollywood? I'm sure whatever three-hour crapfest you come up with will win an Oscar in no time! Cheers.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: The Phantom Story
Review: Star Wars is back! The movie looks and feels great. The special effects are amazing and should really be seen in a movie theater. In particular, the sound effects were incredible. Laser beams are shot behind us and to our sides, as spaceships fly by in space.

Again, it all looks great, but what about a good story? The story found here failed to live up to expectations. Worse, the story failed on its own, even without the Star Wars reputation to uphold. Indeed, if this wasn't part of the Star Wars series, or it really was the first movie made in this series, I doubt there would be a second or third movie made.

This film may be enjoyable for kids under 10 [....] But, for everyone else, don't bother. Go see the Matrix or Starship Troopers instead. What? How can you say this about a Star Wars film? Let me explain.

First, a small child, seven or eight, saves everyone twice. In one instance there is a battle scene where skilled veterans are being destroyed yet this little kid can fly a space craft there and, eventually, save the day. Doesn't say much for the other pilots does it? Yes, that child is young Darth Vader but, so what. He still is only a boy.

Or is he? His mother made some statements suggesting that young Vader may be something more. The mother is also a virgin? Barring a religious expectation, how is that possible? If he was made in a laboratory. Indeed, the Jedi in this book take some of his blood to determine his potential as a Jedi. Boo. Is this the real magic of the force, genetic engineering?

From here, it only gets worse. The main new character, Jar-Jar, is designed for five year olds. He doesn't look real, more like a bad plastic toy and he is really annoying. The Queen, is bland, boring, but, of course, "democratically elected." The battle scenes are, for the most part, robot v. robot. So, who really cares who wins or loses?

There were some good parts to this story. I liked the fights between the Jedi Knights. They looked nice and were well choreographed. The special effects were good. And the potential for the next film is there. Personally, I have to reluctantly recommend against viewing this film. If you have a five year old, okay, let them watch it. Otherwise, this movie wasn't fun. It just wasn't worth watching.


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