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Plan 9 from Outer Space

Plan 9 from Outer Space

List Price: $14.99
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Rating: 4 stars
Summary: "Plan 9" bad, but not that bad
Review: Overhyped as "The Worst Movie of All Time," Ed Wood's film about space aliens trying to take over the world by resurrecting the dead should more appropriately serve as a table of content for all the bad horror movie cliches that were developed over it's time.

Ed Wood's apparent claim to fame were his extraordinarily cheap production values, which complimented the bad acting and abysmal scripts. However, to say that "Plan 9" is "The Worst Film Ever Made" is now somewhat outdated. Trust me, there are much, much, MUCH worse films out there then this one. You have no idea...

So, sit back, relax, and watch an incredibly bad but tasteful movie that even the kids can enjoy.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: What can I say about this movie...that isn't bad?
Review: Let's make a list of all the bad things about this movie. 1)It changes frequently from day to night depending on the scene. In the grave yard, it's always night, on the house porch early evening, and anywhere else, daylight. 2)The acting is horrendous, not to mention the script. When a woman's husband tells her he saw a UFO, she replies, "You mean from up there?" and gestures toward the sky. 3)When they show the UFO, YOU CAN SEE THE STRINGS! The list is endless. If you watch this movie, it's non-stop laughter, and this is a serious horror film.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: WOW
Review: If you see this CD for under $5, get it...you won't regret it. I just can't seem to get enough of the cheesy narrator and the unbelievably corny dialogue...and to think that this was Bela Lagosi's farewell performance...oh well...

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: B/W SCI-FI FLICK FOR A SATURDAY NITE
Review: Aliens once again attack our planet. Only this time they re-invigorate the recently deceased to do thier vile bidding for them! Scenes in the cemetary are frightening enough, and the battle aboard the American spacecraft is amazing. The pre-schoolers who made this film must've been precousious.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Ed Wood's CITIZEN KANE... Welcome to Hell!
Review: Common wisdom has this as the worst movie ever made. I've seen a bunch'a movies, and so far I'd have to agree. The CLASSIC "so bad it's good" flick, this is Ed Wood's CITIZEN KANE. The plot (to use that term in the loosest sense) concerns a group of aliens (led by the most overtly homosexual alien overlord ever to grace the screen... ahead of its time in that way I suppose) who plan to take over the world. "The world," as it turns out, is a graveyard with a bunch of styrofoam tombstones. The aliens are on "Plan 9" (the other eight failed), which involves raising the dead (among them the talent-challenged Tor Johnson and remarkably top-heavy "Vampira"). They do this by... well, it's never quite explained, except that the aliens have "knowledge of... such things." Boris Karloff appears briefly, but died during filming to be replaced by Mrs. Woods' chriopractor. This is a perfect movie, in the sense that it simply could not be any worse. If you've ever had dreams of being a hollywood director, go ahead! You'll NEVER make a movie worse than PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE!

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: ...but five-star in terms of entertainment value
Review: I've read the other reviews, and none can completely capture the essence of "Plan 9." If you have not yet seen this movie, there is no adequate way to describe the numerous engaging faux-pas and blunders that make us all into Ed Wood Jr. fans. My advice: get a copy, invite your friends over, and watch it late at night while knowing each and every one of you could be either drunk or dead and come up with a better movie, but not necessarily more entertaining.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: A Wonderful,Stupid and Magnificent Flop
Review: I saw this movie over 30 years ago and fell in love with it. I think it epitomizes the black and white sci-fi genre at its worst and because of that it's delicious and superb. The movie is so poorly made, acted, directed and edited that all of that together really leaves you with the feeling that because there is no haughty pretense or arrogance like "Day the World Stood Still" you can veg-out and relax. Plan 9 is a classic and I hope it's never pulled from distribution. This thing needs to be around forever to remind us that movies can be made poorly and stupidly and still entertain us. I'm always inspired by this movie. Colour me stupid - go figure.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: You're all stupid. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid! You're Idiots.
Review: This is a perfect example to show what a low budget project can accomplish when the stars are dying, or the cast around you is aging. With the exception of the chiropractor replacing Lugosi, the cast shows what no training or expertise can contribute to movie magic! (I was kidding about the chiropractor)!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: I can't decide whether this deserves one star or five...
Review: This is an utterly hilarious film. Sure, I suppose it's "bad", but that doesn't stop it from being utterly wonderful. It's all so amazing, it's hard to point out specific incidents. You've got to love the gigantic ex-wrestler with a thick Swedish accent as the police chief, you also have to love the way the "flying saucers" wobble across the screen (and, of course, the...um...damaged saucer, in which it's ludicrously obvious that someone set fire to the paper plate. And of course the scene when one of the diabolical aliens' gruesome undead slaves...GOES INSANE and starts trying to strangle one of them. And of course, who could forget the alien captain's dramatically charged condemnation of humanity (Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!). I've seen this film twice, and I'll probably see it a few more times in my life. An utter classic.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Love it!!!!
Review: Most likely the worst movie ever made, possibly second to Wood's other classic "Glen or Glenda?". Non-stop laughs from minute one, especially the narrow escape as Bela Lugosi's stand-in covers his face and walks 3 inches per hour toward our damsel in distress. Not to mention (O.K., I'm mentioning them.) the mistakes which constantly pop up all over the film. Ed Wood should have gotten an Oscar for his editing (watch out for the "Instant Car" near the end) day changes to night at an alarming pace, graveyards metamorphosize before your very eyes, characters magically read from intergalactic cue cards. You will NOT believe how unbelievably dumb and how unbelievably redundant the script is; you simply cannot believe it. (I did that for a reason. If this review seems jumbled to you, it's the same with the movie.) Dialog highlight: "Visits? That would indicate visitors!" Listen for the innovative use for the word "THERE" just as a brave little heroine's fly-boy heads off to his "Wild blue yonder." Wood's moviemaking has no reedeeming value whatsoever.To be sure, certain things were out of Ed's control (the mortality of Lugosi, the narrow budget, the horrible actors he knew), but a dead monkey's feces could have made a better movie. Not to say that "Plan 9" is unwatchable, mind you. It's actually one of my favorites. You just have to really love camp classics. Don't get it for the "Independance Day"-like flying saucers. They've been mistaken for hubcaps for a reason. Ed Wood is the greatest genius in cinematic history!


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