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Planet of the Apes

Planet of the Apes

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Rating: 5 stars
Summary: See if For yourself
Review: Its seems like a lot of people are not taking a liking to this remake..i love Time Burton, and i think he is one of the best directors, i like how he adds a dark and gloomy setting to everything (Batman, Nightmare Before Christmas...etc.), which is whut he did with planet of the apes. I think that it helped out very much, i liked the original, but i liked the remake more..the original was not dark enough for the type of movie it is..i just did not like the setting, and i found it very boring. I liked almost everything about the remake, i liked how Tim Burton maded it a bit comical at times, but did not over do it (ex. of over-doing it: George Lucus, Episode one), it seemed to work out very smoothly. The only thing that bothered me was the ending, it was a good ending...but just wasn't whut you wanted to happen...the relationship between Leo and the blonde haired girl was building towards something..and then just seemed to cut off. At least thats how i saw it to be. Everything else about the movie i liked, people need to realize that this is the 21st century, and things have changed a lot scince when the original was released, i think it was a very well done movie for its generation, fits perfectly. I say pay the 7 bux and go see it for yourself, its not a waste of money, it should be worth your time.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Well at least the apes were good
Review: The visuals in this movie are astounding, the apes were fantastic and the cameo by Heston was almost worth the price of admission alone, but there are two significant drawbacks - Wahlberg ... continues his cheerio box acting in this movie and the story i.e. there isn't one - a believable one anyway.

Two stars for the apes. None for the humans - actors or director.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Never Send A Boy To Do A Man's Job
Review: First the easy part - Mark Wahlberg & Tim Burton versus Charlton Heston & Rod Serling - Case Closed.

Fine so there was no way the so-called re-imagined version would compare to the original, but did it have to be so uninspiring. The first 15 minutes gave me some hope - nice special effects, good setup to a different planet of the apes and even a funny reference to the first movie thrown in. But from there on out it went straight downhill.

Despite over $100 million dollars - I still felt like I was watching a fake movie set, I kept expecting to see a boom mike accidentally show up. Secondly there was no 'humanity' to the movie. The whole point of the original movie and book was to make you question man's treatment of man and of the animal world, in this version you get about 5 minutes haphazardly thrown in. Next, the fact that all the humans actually speak english takes away a major element of the story. It makes no sense that humans would be slaves if they could talk and make strategy. Plus about 100 other plot holes.

Then the dialogue is atrocious. How many cliche's and hackneyed stupid sayings could they possibly put into the movie - 'why can't we all just get along.' There is a difference between sublte irony and pretentious wittiness. Cheesy dialogue is acceptable from an inexperienced movie maker, not here. There was a whole plot line never developed between Helen Carter's ape, Leo (Mark W.) and the blond captive girl. Like many other reviewers I found myself liking the apes a lot more. Plus stealing scenes from the book is NOT the same as bringing out the essence of the book... Instead the movie falls back on marketing and making of specials. Even as a stand alone movie it was bad. And the ending is fair at best.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Could have and Should have been better.
Review: Mr. Burton is a good director and story teller, Sleepy Hollow was excellent. This movie however was not. The whole point of this story was to show the apes as civilized, not running around howling and making monkey sounds and still acting pretty much like apes. Someone on the set should have told him to watch the original movie. I know he says he didn't want to remake the movie, but he should've at least had the apes acting like they had evolved enough to "rule the planet". I heard him say the original was a great"make up movie" well, it also made alot more sense because the apes acted sophisticated enough to make their supremacy to us believable. This movie was a good action movie and makeup movie but very little else.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Have Never seen the original
Review: I have only seen bits of the original Planet of the Apes, and was never particularly impressed or wanting to see more. I was just trying to figure out why my brother loved all those "Apes" movies so much. This really isn't a sequel from what I hear from fans of the original. I thought it was a pretty decent film. It had a lot of fast paced action, the acting was very good. Tim Roth was great as Thade. I didn't know who the actor was all the way through the movie. I had to wait til the credits rolled. He was amazing! He really got into the ape character and developed the gestures of the animal. He really got into it. As for Mark Wahlberg, he's nothing special. He is not a great actor, he is just mediocore at best. Maybe that is what tim Burton wanted for that character..who knows? I have long been a fan of Burton films and that was the main reason I wanted to see this movie. That and the trailer, The trailer really got me interested. It is not his best movie, but it is still entertaining enough for a night at the movies. Another actor that was great is Paul Giamatti,(Pigface from Howard Stern's Private Parts). He is the comic relief. The makeup for the apes was well done as far as the male roles were concerned, but I thought that the make up for Helena Bonham Carter and the other actress playing ape was awful!!!! They looked like Jim Henson creations. They didn't look realistic at all whereas the males were very close to ape form. One looked a lot like King Kong! Can you imagine? A talking KONG? Who'd a thought of that? If you haven't seen the original, and don't really know that story anyway, it may be better for you. It leaves one with more of an open mind and no clues as to what's giong to happen. You're not going to be constantly trying to compare it to the original. Worth a look.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Heston Gets It Right
Review: Enough already with the smug and oh-so trendy knee-jerk bashing of Tim Burton's marvelous "Planet of the Apes". On what grounds is all this grumbling based? Let's see, hmmm... great story and characters, cool look and action, amazing dialogue and near-subliminal scenes, admirable sense of film history and attention to detail? No, that's not it. How about a trilogy of great plot twists to tie the story in in the last half hour? An intriguing final scene (not, as is "Apes" tradition, an ending) that leaves us dying to see just HOW this could have happened and sets up the next film? No?

Well I must admit I miss the half-naked Novi from the original film, so that must be it. Oh, and the fact that it was expensive to make (a sin amongst critics that equates any film with pure evil). Didn't like the amazing Charlton Heston scene, the twists on dialogue from the original, the mataphoracle content? Too obvious for you guys I guess, what with the fact that it should have been YOUR unique vision radiating up on the screen! Not even the "I almost missed it" ape organ grinder with the human begging with a cup, huh? Whoa, you've seen way too many movies, and the thrill is just gone, bro. Tell you what; take some time off, catch some rays and start enjoying clever movies again. You'll be glad you did.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: a grate action movie
Review: I loved this movie I thought it was really good. I cant wait till this video comes out so that I can buy it. This is a must see movie.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: The Dreamlife of Tim Burton
Review: All of the films of Tim Burton are dreams or nightmares or a combination of both. Think "Edward Scissorhands" and you can envision Vincent Price a la Gepetto fashioning Edward's scissor-hands out of garden shears and the brightly painted cotton candy houses where Edward goes to live. Think "Sleepy Hollow" and the headless horseman yearning to be reunited with his head so he can find everlasting peace. And on and on in Burton's films you can see the dreamer at work and at play. In "Planet of the Apes," Burton chose to base his movie on the original source material: the Pierre Boule novel not the previous POA films. A good move I think. As with most of Burton's films this "Planet of the Apes" is a very dark film both in mood and in lighting or lack thereof. And also like all of Burton's movies this film is extraordinarily beautiful to look at with all the production values first rate especially the make up and masks by Rick Baker. This newest "Planet of the Apes" charts the fantastical journey of Leo (Mark Wahlberg) into a land where Apes rule the world. He spends the entire movie attempting to return home much like Dorothy in "The Wizard of Oz." In his attempt to get home he meets up with a "human activist" ape, Ari (Helena Bonham Carter) who helps him find his way home and a nemesis, General Thade (Tim Roth) who doesn't. All this is done in a hyper style of acting befitting this kind of material. This is not the best work that Burton has done but it is exciting and fun and there is a great surprise ending. What more could you ask for?

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Bore the planet!
Review: Tim Burton's "reimagining" of "Planet of the Apes" features some outstanding make up effects, and some interesting set designs: Ape City looks like a moldy wedding cake. And I don't mean that in a bad way. It's a multi-layered world full of jungle creepers and jungle creeps, the apes themselves. But that's about as Burton-esque as this movie gets before turning into generic summer blockbuster crapola, only this time with monkeys instead of Nazis, communists, aliens or terrorists. It's full of ludicrous plot holes, illogical scenes that have no set-up and no pay-off, and features not one bit of terror or interest (after you've seen the cool ape-faces, that is). You're left wondering why they bothered to make it at all.

I've read a number of reviews that tell you to lower your expectations: "If you go into it expecting something dumb, you'll have a good time." Or, if you go into it ready to have wasted money on a bad movie, you won't feel as cheated. Isn't that damning this thing with faint praise? After all, it cost millions to make; at least it could've been interesting. Instead, there's no suspense, no drama and the action sequences are muddled and confusing, especially the big fight near the end. It's barely even a Tim Burton film.

Mark Wahlberg plays the human this time, crash landing after impetuously taking off after a lost chimp-o-naut and running into a freaky time-storm in space. As if the title isn't obvious enough, he lands on a world where talking apes dominate talking people. For some reason (never fully developed in the film), Wahlberg becomes the heaven-born savior for the raggedy, unappreciated human-folk, represented by Estella Warren (shades of Nova!) and Kris Kristofferson, who does absolutely nothing. And there's some punk kid who mouths off and gets in the way. Friendly apes include Helena Bonham Carter as a warm-hearted chimp and Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa as a disgraced gorilla general who's now her loyal servant.

Unfortuntely for everyone, a vicious chimp played by Tim Roth comes calling. Roth's out to kill all the humans for no particular reason (I think maybe he's just a lunatic... yawn), and he's aided by his giant lieutenant, a gorilla played sensitively (I'm serious) by giant actor Michael Clarke Duncan.

Once Wahlberg and company escape Ape City, the story devolves into a sub-"Braveheart," with hordes of people appearing out of nowhere to follow Wahlberg in a revolution he never promised. But plot holes undermine their revolution's momentum. Roth finds out Wahlberg's from another planet, but it doesn't figure into either the story, or his hatred for the astronaut. Really, no one seems suprised, or even to care. Then there's a Carter/Wahlberg/Warren/Roth love rectangle that goes nowhere, especially since Warren has little to do except look hot in leather skins. Which she does. Oh yes, she does indeed.

I won't compare it to the original. No deep philosophical or theological arguments or themes here. You will find a few good performances. Roth is especially chimp-like, and Glenn Shadix (Otho in "Beetlejuice") has a few brief scenes as an orangutan senator. He's funny without being jokey, and Lisa Marie (as his trophy-chimp wife) is hilarious, too. Paul Giamatti plays an ape slave trader, and he's got some cute moments. And, if you don't blink, you'll see Linda Harrison, who played little hottie Nova in the original. And Charlton Heston has a nice little scene as Roth's dying dad.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: the ending sucks
Review: i was looking forward to thus movie forever and well i was disapointed in the long run I mean the movie had a good plot and everything and it was great till the ending. The ending sucked. I don't care if Tim Burton endings are supposed to be weird and wacky the ending sucked. But besides that it's a good movie and you should all go and see it.


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