Armageddon

Rating:
Summary: Does not deserve this star
Review: Armageddon seemed, if nothing else, an action film made purely for entertainment value. But the film simply doesn't work. Everything- the characters, the situation, and the acting is unrealistic. If you like sci-fi movies or love to see continous explosions, this is your movie, as my teenage brother can attest to. But I didn't believe the characters for a second. They all looked like they were reciting lines. The romantic subplot doesn't strike me as real, and the enmity between father and daughter seems forced. The director tried to humanize the movie with sequences from around the globe, but that too looked forced. Not to mention that I didn't feel any threat of impending doom. The world is about to experience an catasrophe! And I felt absolutely no suspense, no fear. You would only love this movie if you live for special effects but it loses its human touch. It is too predictable. It is full of cliches.I liked Independence Day much better since it incorporated both fear and emotion in the viewer, or at the very least me. I must admit though I was stricken when Paris demolished. QUELLE DOMAGE!! I'm used to my hometown being blown up anyway.

Rating:
Summary: Edge of your seat
Review: To all those out there who criticized this film, I say "Dude, what's yer problem?!" This is NOT a film justifying Einstein's theory of relativity! It is a high tension, physics go to hell, tongue in cheek sci-fi THRILLER that does NOT have one dull moment. You got problems with the real physics? Well, so do I, but GET OVER IT! Bruce is Bruce. Liv Tyler may not exude acting skills, but she does a good job of showing her emotion, and giggles okay during the `animal cracker in the low plains scene' with Ben Affleck (watch the movie. You'll see it). Okay, now to the brass tacks.

This film came out about the same time as Deep Impact, another excellent `end of the world by comet' movie. But where DP has Tia Leone as the star, Armaggedon has Bruce. This is a much `harder' film, and a total guy flick with a `take no prisoners' attitiude towards the action and story. That's all there is to it.

A lone retiree with a huge backyard reflective telescope discovers a rogue asteroid the size of Texas. He notifies the military, who discover the asteroid is on a collision course with Earth. Our scientists determine it to be a `planet killer'. Just firing nukes at it will not change the course, the nukes will have to be placed inside the asteroid. Hence, the government decides to drill. The best driller in the world? You guessed it. Bruce. With only 18 days left before total annihilation, it's decided astronauts can't be trained to drill as quickly as drillers can be trained to survive 24 hours in space. Hence, Bruce's team. And his team, is a group of total misfits. Owen Wilson is the free spirited inner space guy, Steve Buscemi is Rockhound (possibly the horniest man on earth). Michael Clarke Duncan is Bear, a HUGE man (imagine, holding the government hostage unless they let him spend the summer at the White House). BUT they and the rest of the crew hold the fate of the world in their hands. The government physicals and mental evaluation scenes of each team member show them to be borderline psychotics.

And into space they go. First to meet with a Russian Space Station. And from there, the action, the color, the tension, and the absolutute beauty of the CG's is non-stop.

Those who have read my reviews know I try not to give away the store. You have to see the movies for yourself. This movie is cutting edge. It is a masterpiece of light, flash, and color. Guys, the surround sound and special effects of meteors hitting the earth is room-shaking and has to be experienced at high volume.

The action cinemagraphics use quick cut scenes to enhance the urgency and the soundtrack keeps these scenes fluid. Although the asteroid/comet looks a bit contrived, that's okay. It's a freakin' MOVIE!

There are tongue in cheek lines throughout, and they keep the seriousness of this film toned down just a hair.

By the way, Leonard Maltin is WAY to critical. Probably saw to many Swedish films. Give him a beer, and he'll love this. I guarantee it. And I am never wrong.

Rating:
Summary: Bruckenheimer's first strikeout
Review: What a waste. Those were the words that echoed thru my mind as the movie ended. What a waste of an outstanding Trevor Rabin soundtrack. What a waste of the considerable talents of Jerry Bruckenheimer and Michael Bay. Not to mention an all-star cast that includes Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Steve Buscemi and Liv Tyler.

The fatal flaw of this movie is that it can't seem to make up its mind what it wants to be. NASA locates an asteroid the size of Texas heading straight for the Earth, and everyone seems to think it hilarious. After the laughter settles down, NASA hires a bunch of oil-rig drillers to go up and take out the asteroid.

So, what we end up with is a movie full of slapstick comedy, combined with good special effects. However, every once in awhile a sentimental, tender moment is stuck in. Can you imagine someone trying to integrate a serious, emotional moment into a movie like "Airplane!"? No? Well, that's what they did with this movie. The result is nothing less than absurd. And I won't even ask why NASA deemed it necessary to take gatling gun into space with them.

Don't get me wrong: I'm all for fun movies. "Con Air" and "Gone In 60 Seconds" are two of my favorite movies as far as pure entertainment goes. It's just that there is something about the threat of an asteroid hitting the Earth and making the human race going the way of the dinosaur which seems incompatible with a slapstick comedy. "Deep Impact" is a far superior movie; it has the reflective moments minus the comedy.

Rating:
Summary: Good entertainment.
Review: Although I prefer Deep Impact, because it has more about average people in it, Armageddon is still excellent. The characters (especially the roughnecks) are fascinating, the dialogue is snappy, and it combines tear-jerking with triumph in the ending.

Rating:
Summary: Da Bomb!
Review: This movie is one of my favorites. Although it's not a thriller, I still thoroughly enjoyed it. This movie is a lot like the movie Deep Impact, only WAY better. It isn't slow and boring. Armageddon has lots of explosions and is filled with action. There's also some emotional scenes that might make some cry. In addition, it has great music to it, and at the end there's a music video from Aerosmith. I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing is a great song! Armageddon is a great movie!

Rating:
Summary: Armageddon is Great!
Review: Although for the exception of PEARL HARBOR, Director MICHAEL BAY has shown improvment every film he directs, along with his sidekick producer- Jerry Bruckheimer.

BAY's third blockbuster film, ARMAGEDDON, is the adventure story of oil drillers recruited by NASA to stop an asteriod the size of Texas, from colliding with Earth. ARMAGEDDON brings all-star actors: BRUCE WILLIS (Die Hard Trilogy, The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable), BEN AFFLECK (Pearl Harbor, Dogma, Reindeer Games), BILLY BOB THORTON (Pushing Tin, A Simple Plan), LIV TYLER (That Thing You Do, Inventing the Abbots), WILL PATTON (Gone in 60 Seconds) and STEVE BUSCEMI (Con Air, Billy Madison).

MY REVIEW:

"ARMAGEDDON is great! Why do so many people put this movie down? This movie is perfect in every aspect! The adventure, special effects, acting and story is phenomenal! This is one of my favorite movies! The BAY/BRUCKHEIMER team never fails in my book! This is far better than it's competitor- DEEP IMPACT! ARMAGEDDON is a great rush of excitment! It is also emotional, inspiring and humorous! See this movie immediately! It is spectacular!"- MJV & the Movies.

Rating:
Summary: "We're going to blow it up."
Review: I watched this movie with the expectation that if I didn't take anything away from it, at least I would have been entertained.

Oh God, I was wrong.

This movie actually gave me a migrane. The camera work is consistantly swooping with quick cuts--basically, most of the movie looks like a car commercial or music video (without the substance). The "action sequences" were so loud and out of proportion with the rest of the movie, I had to cover my ears. I wish I could have covered my eyes at the same time.

The plot is absolutely worthless and there is no point getting into it. I saw "Deep Impact," and even though the basic concept is just about the same I found that movie immeasurably more entertaining. And "Deep Impact" was NOT that good.

The characters and the development are SO RAZOR THIN and formulaic that I actually waited until the end of the movie, hoping and praying that the asteroid would hit the Earth and kill them all. Let's see... Steve Buschimi (one of my favorite actors) as a platform driller, even though he has, what? two (2) PhDs or something like that??? Ben Affleck is overrated because he's good looking. Liv Tyler is/has/always will be boring if not pleasant to look at. Bruce Willis can make it, but not with this pathetic vehicle.

What an ugly disappointment....

Rating:
Summary: if swallowed, induce...
Review: Michael Bay should be taking Ritalin.

emp

ty

Although, Bruce Willis has rarely looked finer...

Rating:
Summary: Easy- Too easy
Review: I want to say this before anything else- no movie should be rated by how much patriotic propaganda it does. That is the easiest and stupidist way to blame and critisize a movie.

Easy. That's what this movie is. Easy moviemaking. It is not an accomplishment to keep an audiences attention by getting a few dramatic moments tied by a lot of two second explosion shots; which is what essentally this movie is.

Let's start by the things that I personally liked: First of all, my fav thing of this movie was the music. No, not Aerosmith's horrible single, but the score of the film itself. I thought it was pretty nice, and fitted the action.

A second extra is the cast: Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Billy Bob Thornton, Will Patton, Liv Tyler, Steve Buscemi, Owen Wilson, Michael Clarke Duncan and William Fichtner. It's intresting to see the blockbuster stars mix with the the stars of indie.

Director Michael Bay tries hard for the dramatic scenes to work. Real hard. And they aren't badly shot.

Which is about as good as it gets. Now for the bad parts.

The screenplay is pretty horrible. Some of Buscemi's lines hold wit, but there is no chemistry at all between Willis and Affleck, or between Tyler and any character.

I said that the cast is pretty big. But it is completely wasted. Willis is the main reason for that, no suprise there. None of the other actors are pretty good either, in fact some, like Fichtner and Affleck are absolutely annoying. The worst tragedy is the waste of Liv Tyler, who was good in movies such as Stealing Beauty is horrible, absolutely horrible and the screenplay just makes her preformance worse.

Why does Michael Bay think that this is the only way to make a movie? It's probably the only way he thinks movies are done. He can't hold one shot long enough to make sense or not evoke boredom, so quick- cut to a shot of things exploding. Nope, that ain't enough- better make it 10 shots!! And that's the entire way his movies work. How utterly unimaginative, untalented and in fact scary; when I see all these good reviews on this site, I see that Bay succeeded.

I have yet to see Bad Boys. Out of all of Bay's movies, only The Rock is good enough to be remembered in the future.

What the horrible thing is that most of the world audience will tell their children of this movie and of Jerry Bruckheimer, instead of some "guy" named Stanley Kubrick or Orson Welles.

That reason alone is enough to hate this movie actually.

Yet the movie is watchable. In fact it's even possible to have a little fun. But don't expect too much, and please, PLEASE- do not tell this stuff to your children when refering to good movies. Because this isn't.

Rating:
Summary: Worthless
Review: Even the folks who rated this a 5 admit to it being a dumb movie. Go figure.