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Star Wars - Episode II, Attack of the Clones (Full Screen Edition)

Star Wars - Episode II, Attack of the Clones (Full Screen Edition)

List Price: $19.98
Your Price: $13.99
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Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Razzle, Dazzle and Fizzle
Review: In the interest of striking a balance to the many reviews which will be written of how this is a box office sensation or how enjoyable it is to watch, I sense a responsibility on my part to point out how disappointing the movie was. Yes, the special effects were first rate, state-of-the-art and many other superlatives. That, however, is as much as I can give the two stars I've rated. It appears film makers have lost touch with the ability to simply tell a story and George Lucas, sorry to say, is the latest victim. Sorry, George, space ships and flying Jedi alone won't make it! This movie fails horribly to convey a cogent story line. The love interest, let alone marriage, between "Anakin" and "Amidala" is far from believable. The movie quickly jumps from one fight scene to battle to fight scene without any reason. It's so fragmented and choppy in its editing it becomes difficult to follow. Like him or not, "Jar Jar" is back and as irritating as ever. This is a movie which exalts special effects leaving room for little else and a script which seldom allows the actors to ply their trade. The acting did convince me of one thing, though. Even the actors realize how bad a film this is.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: The best in the series
Review: If you hated the Phantom Menace, give this movie a try. It's sure to excite Star Wars fans and intrest viewers who aren't familiar with Star Wars. (God only knows who those dreaded people are.)

Episode 2 takes place 10 years after episode 1, and much has changed. Senator Palpatine is more powerful, Padme is a senator, as is Jar-Jar Binks. (Don't worry folks. Out of the 140 minutes of the movie, he's in it for about 3 minutes.) Anakin is older, as is Obi-Wan Kenobi. The plot is basically all politics. A mysterious man named Count Dakoo has made an alliance with the sith to build the DEATH STAR and bring down the republic. Also, there are separtists to ade them. At the same time, the Trade Fedaration wants revenge and builds another army to attack. In addition to that, weird creatures are building a clone army to ade the republic. The clones are made out of Boba Fett's dad, Jango Fett. Soon enough, the plot turns and you're taken on a ride that is in comparison to episode 4. You see a lot of the characters from episode 4 as well.

As far as the action is goes, it's downright amazing. While the first part of the movie may not have a lot of action, the last 30 minutes make up for that. There is a huge battle where over 200 Jedi with lightsabers attack bad droids with the help from the clone army, which look like the stormtroopers from episodes 4, 5, and 6. Also, there is a cool lightsaber fight were we see Anakin fight with 2 lightsabers. Yoda gets in on the action as well. Although the fight is good, the lightsaber fight in episode 1 is just a tad better.

As for the special effects, they're freakin amazing! Some of the shots during the end battle are basically overloads of special effects. I'd have to freeze-frame some of those shots at least 50 times to catch all of the details in them.

The characters are great as well. Padme has much more life to her, and it nice to see the story NOT revolve around a 10 year old kid that can't act worth a darn. Christopher Lee is great as always, as is Ewan McGregor.

So, if you like Star Wars, ar if you just like cool action, see this movie!!! Highly recommened!

2002; 140 minutes; Rated PG for some scenes of sci-fi/action violence.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Getting there
Review: ...more pieces have finally been added to the puzzle and I see a story forming up now hehe. The movie was visually "WoW!" but the story lacked the intensity that iv v and vi had. (my opinion of course) Obi Wan seemed no more skilled than he did in the Phantom Menace (which was a let down 'cause I'm a fan)despite the fact that he had a lot more action in this film. I felt like slapping Hayden's character, Anikan, a few times. He was a nagging, whinning,'you're not the boss of me' disrespectful little teen who's emotions got the better of more than twice in this movie. I guess that's the character though. (Loved the fight scenes.) My eyes widened and I readjusted my booty in the seat as the pace started picking up near the end of the movie. The tie breaker and highlight in this movie, and I think a lot of people will agree, was the master himself, Yoda. *how'd they get the puppet's hand to stay in there? * hehe. j/k. I know I know CG. It was really well staged and I had an "oh heck yeah" attitude when his big scene was in motion. Anyway, the film has its ups and downs but it's definately worth a peek, especially if you grew up with the films...

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: One disappointment after another...
Review: I agree with every mediocre to horrible review I've read so far. I was extremely disappointed yesterday after seeing Attack of the Clones, and still feel a bit depressed by the whole thing. The "love story" aspect was the least of it's problems. And for those of you who fault the acting, I do agree; remember though that Mark Hamill and Carrie Fischer had their moments of less than stellar performances. I'll try to summarize the reasons why I hated it (SPOILERS INCLUDED, so beware):

First, there is such a thing as CGI overkill. Many scenes were WAAY too busy to be comfortable for my eyes, and the scenes on Coruscant made me feel like I was watching Blade Runner, The Fifth Element, or Total Recall -- and dammit, I think Yoda looked better as a Muppet! Secondly, I thought the conveyor belt scene in the battle droid factory was one of the most ridiculous things I've seen -- I could almost hear the Bugs Bunny factory music (also used in Rush's "La Villa Strangiato")!Thirdly, I can't picture ANY Jedi hanging out in a 50s-style diner. Fourthly, since when do Tusken Raiders kidnap, instead of burn & pillage? Next -- "Hi mom, you're alive! Oops, wait, no you're not." Could we have maybe done a *little* more with that scene to make it believable? Next, I have a hard time with the fact that all stormtroopers are actually clones of Boba Fett's father -- the only reason Jango was written into the script was because of Boba's unexpected cult following from episodes V & VI. Ultimately no reason for the dude to be there at all. Next, can you say "Gladiator"? Finally, five words: COUNT DOOKU? NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.

I have many more gripes, but space is limited. All in all, I feel that Episode Two was very confused and didn't know what it wanted to be. The script was very disjointed and overall not edited well. It just didn't have that "Star Wars" feel. Say what you want about Phantom Menace, but even with all it's CGI enhancements, Gungans and two-headed announcers, at least it FELT like a Star Wars movie.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: A review by someone who HAS seen the movie!
Review: ...

I went and saw "Attack of the Clones" not nine hours ago, and have this to report of the movie:

Whilst it is in parts an action bonanza, Episode Two is not really BETTER than the movies from the original trilogy. Some of the scenes in episode two are far, far superior to those witnessed in episodes four, five and six. However, the movie fails to gel as a viewing experience - the initial scenes, whilst quite enthralling, quickly digress into an insipid love affair between Anakin and Amidala. This part of the film, which truly made me want to fall asleep, persists for well over an hour and makes up the bulk of the film.

However, despite the laborious love sub-plot, Star Wars episode two contains within its busty innards some of the most scintillating scenes yet viewed in a Star Wars movie.

The opening scenes, involving a speeder chase through Coruscant are both highly detailed and very entertaining. Obi-Wan's confrontation with Jango-Fett is superb, and the penultimate lightsaber scene is perhaps by itself worth the price of admission.

Overall, I believe this movie is worth seeing. If you are a Star Wars fan, you will probably marvel at quite a few of the genuinely entertaining- and yes, sometimes amusing- scenes in Attack of the Clones, and probably forgive the many cloying, unimaginative romantic moments.

Be prepared to see both the good and the dark sides of George Lucas' creative powers. But, overall, be secure in the knowledge that this film is far superior to 'The Phantom Menace' and definitely NOT a waste of your money.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: The Death of Cinema
Review: Why does a picture like Star Wars: Episode Whatever make so much money? Why do people see it? I did not get the idea until I saw that piece of trash last night. Judging from the moronic clapping and shouting that came of 2/3 of the audience when scenes like Yoda's light saber battle were shown, I am guessing the emotional maturity of the crowd ceased it's progression at age four. The actors were horrid. Probably the worst performances in the last decade of film. George Lucas is the absolute worst director in the history of cinema. A director like Harmony Korine could take a [price] hand-held camera and make something that relates to human emotions in a new way. George Lucas spends millions and... ugh. People I have talked to use the argument: "You just don't like sci-fi." Does sci-fi have to include terrible acting, terrible direction, and no emotional involvement from the viewer? Tarkovsky's Solaris was the closest a sci-fi film came to being intellectual. Star Wars is garbage. And this "epic saga" changes people's lives? When someone tells me a movie has changed their life, I assume that it has some relevence with their own life. A bunch of drab, moronic chatter intercut with idiotic fight scenes changing a person's life is frightening. I am frightened for the future of humanity. 0 stars. Morons. Iditos. Arggg Im so mad. Ugh.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Horrible from beginning to end (Well, except for 5 minutes)
Review: This movie was flat, lifeless and pointless. The romance was predictable, the characters were boring and the action was just a rehash of all the other action movies since CGI really came on line.

The movie has two redeeming qualities-a five minute action sequence with Yoda and the lovely, comely Natalie Portman.

Not exactly worth 9 bucks and 2 1/2 hours of my life.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Thank God we can forgive the acting with effects and plot
Review: Here we go again with absolutely the best special and visual effects, costumes and characters the sci-fi film world has ever seen, and thank the Maker these forgive the atrocious acting of most of the characters.

Sitting with an opening night audience of over 1200 people, the majority of us were laughing out loud at the stilted, stiff, soap-opera quality level of dialog and delivery of Anakin and Amidala, as well as others who sounded like they were reciting cue cards, including Samuel Jackson and another person I won't reveal. Lucas gave adult love banter to teenagers, and it fails miserably. They are no better, if not worse, than Calvin Klein Obsession commercials.

Worse, the development of their relationship and their characters is not only unbelievable, it's almost unbearable. These are 2 of the worst actors I've ever seen, but the action and plot make up for them. Christopher Lee as Count Dooku (of all names), however, is the ultimate bad guy and never fails to deliver with every scene and word. The droids, as always, are hilarious and charming.

On a positive note, Lucas has expanded his plot to cover considerably more ground than the last episode, as well as be far more understandable to a broader mainstream of viewers. We are taken to many new visually stunning worlds, as well as familiar ones, given more insight to existing characters, and best of all, given a tantalizing taste of what is still to come.

Clones also takes scenery and battle scenes beyond the next level, with unparalleled sound that will shake your fillings and visuals that will delight your eyes. The chase and fight scenes alone are worth the ticket (too bad that's all that's notable). It's also a lot of fun to see how the story continues to wind up to the beginning of A New Hope. Just think, only 3 more years until we see Anakin try on his new helmet.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Hayden Christensen's Movie
Review: Man, this was Hayden Christensen's movie. Here's the good and the bad.

THE GOOD:

Anakin:
Hayden Christensen was absolutely marvelous as Anakin. Everything he did was right on the mark. Everything from teenage rebellion, to rage, to angst, to love. Everything a teenager hits for the first time growing up. He nailed it all.

Obi-Wan:
Anakin didn't like Obi-Wan always ripping on him. And you could tell that Obi-Wan didn't want to be the nagging parent, always ripping on the kid. But, the kid was being stupid, and Obi-Wan just did what he had to do, like it or not.
The scene where Obi-Wan gets a drink at the bar was priceless. That will be a classic.

Amidala:
Beautiful, but I've always been a pushover for long dark hair and big brown eyes.
Getting stripped down to a bare midrif for the entire final battle: Yummy! Almost as good as Leah in Jabba's court.
Most of her scenes were right on, but some of the love scenes kind-of dragged on, but that was more of a script problem. Plus she was definitely more stuffy than Anakin was about showing her feelings, but that was in character as Amidala, she actually did loosen up from her Queen days.

THE BAD:

Yoda:
The CG Yoda just didn't work at all. He looked flat and cartoonish through every scene he was in.
Yoda, the commanding general, seemed very out of character for the mischievous yet serious Yoda we saw in Empire. Why does Yode have to be the best at everything?
Yoda getting jiggy with his light saber. Sorry that didn't do anything for me. I would have skiped the Yoda duel in favor of Dooku fighting Anakin with a light saber in each hand for a full 4 minutes instead.

Jar-Jar:
That was quite a stretch to go from a clumsy, bumbling idiot of the first movie, to the somber, noble, and elegant Jar-Jar of the second movie. Every scene he was in, I was expecting him to trip over his own robes. The fact that he didn't was strangely out of charater for him.

R2D2 & C3PO:
R2 flying, that was a stretch. Why hasn't he done it before?
R2D2 & C3PO doing an Abott and Costello routine during the final battle was just annoying.

The Clappers:
How did that scene from Galaxy Quest get in a Star Wars movie? I was expecting Segorny Weaver to come out and say "whoever wrote that episode should be shot".

CONCLUSION:

Basically this was Hayden Chistensen's movie, he carried the show, everyone else was just along for the ride. Every scene he was in worked, and every scene he wasn't in fell flat. Fortunately he was in most of the scenes of the movie.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: The Force is strong in this one
Review: This film was excellent on so many levels. The script was much stronger than The Phantom Menace, Hayden Christiansen portrayed Anakin suberbly (quickly shifting between emotions), and the end-battle alone is worth the price of admission!

If we could do 1/2 stars I would give this film 4.5 stars.

I eagerly await the last installment in the saga!


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