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John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars

John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars

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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: This is NOT return to form.
Review: There are many questions us mere mortals have. The first is "Is there is God?". The second is "Why I am here?". The third is "Just what has gone wrong with John Carpenter?"

Please tell me that the people who gave this film anything more than two stars are kidding right? Have you ever seen another John Carpenter movie? What is wrong with you people? This is NOT return to form. This is NOT even a good film. The acting is abysmal and if anything John Carpenter has got worse - No! Strike that - he is now the #1 nose-diving director in the history of cinema. In the 1970s, 1980 and even early 1990s Carpenter ruled. Even his mediocre films where better than average and worthy of repeat viewings and certainly DVD ownership. Then came - Village of the Damned (1995), Escape from L.A. (1996), Vampires (1998)... and now Ghosts of Mars (2001)... BOMB, BOMB, BOMB and now the ultimate John Carpenter TRAINWRECK has arrived. Not only is this film devoid of suspense or a coherent storyline but it is also Carpenter's most stupid work to date. The man is not only in quicksand but he IS quicksand, taking down everything he touches with him. Natasha Henstridge has her lamest role to date as she plays an intergalactic cop who is hooked on some LSD drug that actually plays a vital plot twist in saving her from becoming infected. WHAT??? Ice Cube plays a con turned good guy who is there to do what these ex-rappers are stereotypically doing in all these movies... playing to the audience that come to see their one-liners and machismos. Jason Statham, fresh from the movie "Snatch", takes on a career low point as a cop in the background running around looking paranoid and angry. The poor Pam Grier had to suffer through this one for only a few minutes but even when she is on the screen boy does it seem like Jackie Brown is something of an acting miracle for her. Worst of all is Clea DuVall. You will be shocked to see her scene in what has to be the worst bit of action acting in the history of cinema as she stands on a sand dune trying to shoot the monsters. I nearly fell clean out of my chair just seeing her arms going back and forth in the most pathetic attempt at a performance you will ever see - "Help me Mr. Carpenter! Just what is it that I am supposed to be doing here again????". Reply - "Shut up and keep dancing up and down as if you are firing those guns at something." She isn't even looking at what she is shooting. She isn't even paying attention to what her arms are doing. It is like she is having a fit on film. Maybe that scene alone is worth watching this movie for.

The plot.. oh good heavens... is about a prison on Mars that has just become host to some sort of a "ghost" defence system that turns people into quasi-zombie-neanderthal maniacs that hunt down whoever they see. The leader of that group looks quite nasty but this is pitifully - No, Strike that... pathetically mishandled in the worst way that your mind can possibly conceive. Nothing will prepare you for how OUTRAGOUSLY BAD this movie actually is. Carpenter should be put on "suicide watch" after making this one.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: havent we seen this before in John Carpenter
Review: I think this is somewhat of Carpenter's Assault On Precint 13...which was better then this snoozer....Henstridge and co(Grier, Statham and DuVall) find a place that is desolated and somethings happened..people are all crazed like zombies..Henstridge and co also has help from Mr. Desolation Williams(Ice Cube) who is good in this puppy who what gives....alot of the victims look like they turned into punk rockers I mean come on...we couldve did without them punkasses

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Carpenter returns to his hard action roots.
Review: Unfairly dismissed by both critics and fans at the time of its release, John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars is the cult director at his most b-movie retro. What Ghosts does it take the narrative of Assault on Precinct 13 (cops and criminals in an isolated police station find themselves teaming up to fight a hostile army) and sprinkles it with elements from Prince of Darkness and Escape from New York. The results might fall short of Carpenter at his best, but there is no denying the movie has enough energy (in the good, old fashioned rough and tumble sense - no wire-fu or bullet time digital hijinks found here, thank goodness) and humor to hold a forgiving fans interest. The only major flaw is a ludicrous about face attack at the 1:17 mark, other than that it delivers a fun little b-movie thrill.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Triumphant return of Carpenter!
Review: Though John Carpenter had more "misses" than "hits" in the 1980's through the 1990's, this movie stands out. It features great direction, almost 3 dimensional characters, an orignal futuristic plot, and great music. In sum, it's pure Carpenter.

Good DVD extras.

Highly recommended.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: CARPENTER HAD TO BE KIDDING, RIGHT?
Review: Oh John where have you gone? HALLOWEEN...THE FOG...THE THING...These were your truly good movies. Since then, we've had to go from THE SERPENT AND THE RAINBOW to VAMPIRES to this uproariously bad movie! If you intended it to be high camp, well then I would give you three or four stars, but it seems as though you weren't aiming for camp, or it would have been campier! Awful special effects; there's one scene when they're on the train that it looks like a cardboard box. Awful acting...except for Jason Statham, who appared to be enjoying himself. Ice Cube was as cold as his name; Natasha Hensridge should play non-speaking parts, although in this one she isn't even that attractive; shame on Pam Grier for joining the crew. It's like Carpenter cast the real zombies from NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD. And the music, oh John, how awful. It was so distracting from the movie!!! What made HALLOWEEN so effective was it's "ordinariness"--one could actually feel it's reality; THE THING was likewise ominous in its wondering who was possessing who? This face should definitely join the list of the worst sci-fi films made. Yuck!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Unashamed cheese
Review: Ghost of Mars is the type of movie they don't seem to make anymore. John Carpenter borrows elements from a number of his previous films, most obviously Assault on Precinct 13, The Thing, and The Fog, as well as genre staples like Night of the Living Dead, Aliens, and the entire western genre. He also foregoes the excessive CGI typical of a sci-fi action film these days and settles into B-movie territory with gusto. He loves cheese, he loves rebellious statements about society and politics delivered between head bashing action and heavy metal riffs.

In the year 2176, some cops (led by the gorgeous Natasha Henstridge) are traveling to a mining city on Mars to transfer a dangerous prisoner (Ice Cube). They find the city completely empty save for a few bodies, but the prisoners are still sitting in jail. It's not long before they discover a tribe of very angry mutants who seem to enjoy self-mutilation, sharp weapons, and a lot of killing. It turns out that some miners unwittingly unlocked a vault that was keeping some kind of alien life form thingee trapped inside, so we have a little bit of The Keep as well. (Now there's a bad sci fi movie to borrow from if there ever was one). This life form is airborne and takes over people, turning them into speedy zombies that like driving blades through their own flesh, screaming a lot in front of bonfires, and wreaking havoc.

So we get some Rio Bravo (the basis for Assault) action as the cops and criminals band together to blow away the creatures with weapons from the present day. Strange, but today's soldiers seem better equipped than the people in this movie are; it would be like outfitting the US Army in 2003 with muskets.

The head zombie looks like he should be fronting a Norwegian Black Metal band as his role calls for a lot of screaming, waving of a rubbery sword, and Viking action, and the other zombies look like understudies for KISS or GWAR, which lends the film a silly, fun quality. I'm not sure why they're so angry, especially since the humans freed them...

Henstridge clearly cannot act; not sure if Species had a bigger budget than this or not, but that film at least had her running around naked when the violence wasn't exploding on the screen. Her face is very chiseled, but she seems to be thinking of something else (her best 'acting' comes during her drug induced high battle with the demons). Pam Grier shows up, briefly, before her severed head makes an appearance. Jason Statham is always fun with his English equivalent of a Brooklyn accent. Ice Cube, as the criminal James 'Desolation' Williams (er, right) scowls most of the time and gets to do some gangsta action with two guns (check out that chrome plated gun at the end) as well as sport a leather jacket that looks like he wore it to the set that day. Joanna Cassidy shows up to give some exposition and little else.

This is a fatalistic movie, with most of the characters eventually being sliced and diced. It has a typical Carpenter ending, which is always welcome amid the typical Hollywood action endings. There's even a pro-drug message at one point (go Carpenter!)

However, what I can't figure out is how this film, made in 2001, can look cheaper than lower budget flicks Carpenter made earlier in his career. If Carpenter was going for pure B-movie fodder, he succeeded almost too well. In typical Carpenter fashion, the director composes the music himself (apparently with help of Anthrax). It seems hard to believe it even got a theatrical release, given the look of the film. It's like it fell out of 1982 or something, with sets that look like they sprinkled some Star Trek props with red dust. Apparently, people can breathe on Mars now, even with those hot white lights that Carpenter has hanging just out of camera range.

I love John Carpenter, but I have to wonder what's up with his career. He probably has difficulty getting funding for his movies, and I fear another movie like this and he could be off to straight-to-DVD-land. He does, however, get a lot of credit for just not caring about typical Hollywood norms anymore and doing what he wants to do (remaking his previous films).

Ghosts of Mars is a cheesy movie, period. Carpenter clearly misses B-movies of yore, genre films that didn't have to be mega-blockbusters. It's definitely a good cheap DVD pickup with plenty of potential for repeat viewings of the mayhem that ensues on screen (have to love the head zombies excessive screaming and posing). This might offend even Carpenter addicts, but it's a guilty pleasure, completely, totally unpretentious, and fun.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Who green lit this mess?
Review: Did the producers of this "film" (and I use the term "film" very loosely) actually think they had something of value on their hands? Did they consider that there might be some intelligence sitting in the showing room? Did they hope to even "break even" with box office receipts?

I won't be a "spoiler" to those that wish to view it but I will add that there is a great predictability factor present. One example is labeling two characters as "rookies". I knew then that those two would have a short onscreen "life span".

You can spot the plot inconsistencies MILES before they occur. There are so many unanswered questions by the end of the picture that one might wonder if the screenwriter had finished primary school.

Fortunately for Pam Grier, her screen time is limited. I'm sure that she would love to disassociate herself with this, shall we say, lump of coal.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: cool and groovy
Review: Surreal sets, eerie soundtrack and Natasha gloriously blowing up monsters makes for one good time, indeed.

John Carpenter's films satisfy at the level of true imagination that encompasses fear and humor.

I wish "hyper-critics" could go down as easily as evil Martians.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Ghosts of Mars brings its A Game
Review: There should be no talk of B Movie status with Ghosts of Mars. This is an A movie through and through. Where can I start. Well good acting makes movies, so how about the star studded cast. Ghosts has some of the most underrated stars working in Hollywood today. Natasha Hendsrick shows us every nuance of her character, from the authoratative leader she is forced to become to her scared iner-self which has to rely on drugs as a crutch to compensate for her lack of self confidence. And now Ice Cube; I truly believed he was Mars' most notorious criminal. But like Natasha's charachter he is a multi layered onion who can also kick butt! The supporting cast is also very good. But where would good actors be without great writing and this movie has it. The dialog is filled with intensity suspense, and even a few laughs (go figure!!). And those monsters, I don't know what they're saying, but I'm not arguing with them! The storyline kept me on the edge of my seat trying to guess what was going to happen next. I'll tell you what I want to happen next: GHOSTS OF PLUTO - DESOLATION STRIKES BACK!

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Over all an enjoyable movie with a few mistakes.
Review: "The Ghosts of Mars" has a very enjoyable plot. The story actually makes the movie, everything else falls on its face. The actors are good, they just don't belong in this movie. Especially Ice Cube. Normally I like Ice Cube (as an actor) but this time around it didn't seem to work for him. He's had better roles. The special effects are ok, sometimes lame but its really the story that counts. Look past the flaws and try to enjoy the story. You'll have fun, stop being SO serious!


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