Rating: 
Summary: Please don't support this film in any way
Review: Were do I start, first of all Tim Burton spat in the face of the real creator, this was totally not what the original story was like. He should not have given it the same name. He should have called it; I couldn't think of anything original, so I used someone elses good work and stunk it up!
Rating: 
Summary: "Can't we all just get along?"
Review: The quote above gives you an example of the kind of humor in Tim Burton's *Planet of the Apes*. It rather reminds one of recent Disney animated features like *Aladdin*, which try to make myths "topical" by making use of the flotsam floating in the current cultural mainstream. Problem is, no one 50 years from now will get the Rodney King reference . . . but maybe that's OK, because no one will remember Burton's movie 50 years from now, either. People WILL remember 1968's *Planet of the Apes* because it relied on its own inventiveness, even creating its own one-liners that are still remembered today: "Damn them all to hell!", and "Get your filthy hands off me, you damn dirty ape!" (Charlton Heston gets to say both lines again in Burton's version, this time from an ape's point of view regarding humans.) What this movie boils down to is LACK of inventiveness, the computer animation and handsomely mounted set design notwithstanding. I suppose the ape make-up is better than in the original version. Big deal -- since this story is supposed to work as "myth", of what use are "realistic" costumes? However, the improved costumes are cancelled out by Mark Wahlberg in the central role. Mr. Wahlberg does not constitute an improvement over Charlton Heston, regardless of the latter's faults as an actor. Mr. Wahlberg is fine as a dim-witted porn star, but a hero he ain't. One thing the re-make has in the same amounts as the original is (alas) the smarty-pants moralizing so typical of Rod Serling's work. (Serling helped write the original movie's screenplay.) Everyone fondly remembers the famous trick ending -- the very Twilight Zone-ish ending -- of the original; in order to fulfill his "homage", Burton feels that he also must concoct a trick ending . . . whether it makes any sense or not. In any case, a point that I think everyone has missed is that the original film's plot was an enjoyable, gimmicky novelty. Novelties wear off quickly -- this is why they're called "novelties". This particular novelty was not designed to withstand the 4 sequels it spawned in the 1970's . . . or Tim Burton's "re-imagining" of it 30 years later. (How can one "re-imagine" a novelty?)
Rating:
Summary: A matter of the wrong director with the wrong script
Review: This is pretty horrible, and that much should be obvious. This is why:
1) Tim Burton wanted to do this film, but he failed to understand that, great director though he is, this film simply does not fit his style. At all. It doesn't work visually, and
2) the script is terrible, so it doesn't work on any level below visually.
3) The best actor in the film had to have been Tim Roth, and I must question the logic of taking him and applying so much makeup and costuming so as to eliminate the actor. He can't emote through the mask and he has to affect a raspy "monster voice" that obscures any of his vocal talents. And his villainous character is far too one-dimensional, despite attempts to make him otherwise with Charlton Heston's cute cameo. The other actors are either similarly buried, or grossly undertalented in relation to their roles.
4) The ending... well, I won't even go there. Let's just say that the Statue of Liberty was sorely missed.
5) The Stupidity factor. A big, dumb action adventure film fashioned from a psychological future shock classic? Bad idea.
6) Spaceballs: "...There goes the Planet."I liked the music though. Danny Elfman never slips up. The opening credits were the best part of the film.
Rating:
Summary: The Apes Of Wrath
Review: There's too much monkey business going on in this movie for me to comment on. Tim Burton is the 800 pound gorilla who got the movie studio to greenlight this project. He termed this film a reimagining of the original classic, not a remake. Audiences and critics alike did not go ape for the result. Mark Wahlberg displayed the emotional depth and acting ability of a sedated chimp. Tim Roth walked like he suffered from terminal jock itch. Maybe that's how he was able to jump so high throughout the movie. Helena Bonham Carter played both beauty AND the beast. The statue of Ape Lincoln at the end was a mild surprise at best. Trying to watch hour after hour of all the bonus features drove me bananas! Save your money and buy the original film. Don't let them make a monkey out of you!
Rating:
Summary: All Dressed Up With No Place To Go
Review: Tim, Tim, Tim. How could you? Yeah, Mars Attacks! wasn't great, but at least it was fun. I got more worried with Sleepy Hollow which, despite some great moments, seemed a bit too mainstream for a Tim Burton flick. Now, though, I'm seriously losing respect for you. I'm not a person who throws the term "sell-out" around very often, but you're pushing your luck. Great special effects, great costumes, great makeup, a great DVD with great features - this all means nothing if underneath it all there's no substance.
You can tell, for example, when watching Edward Scissorhands or Nightmare Before Christmas, that the director was truly passionate and invested in those films. Planet Of The Apes feels like it was directed by a robot. I can only hope you agreed to direct this for the money to help finance a much more Burton-esque picture yet to come. I found it ironic that the "apes" displayed far more depth and range as actors than the "human" cast. I can't even say "Mark Wahlberg has all the talent of a monkey" anymore, as this is almost a compliment now. <By the way, you can't accuse me of being biased and comparing it to the original as (gasp!) I've never even seen the original.> If only the quality of a DVD was a reflection of the quality of the movie within, then maybe our civilization would be getting somewhere.
Rating: 
Summary: Suffers from Comparison
Review: Tim Burton's reworking of the "Planet of the Apes" comes up short compared to the original or just any good movie. While this "Planet of the Apes" is not a remake of the original, it must be compared to the original, not as if it were a sequel, but as if it were an alternative original. In this version Capt Leo Davidson (Mark Wahlberg) has crashed on a barren planet after having traveled forward in time. The planet he crashes on is, of course, the home to a race of intelligent apes. Furthermore, the apes have enslaved the humans who occupy the planet with them. Leo befriends Ari (Helena Bonham Carter), a female ape concerned about the plight of the humans. She helps him escape captivity at the risk of her own life. General Thade (Tim Roth) knows that Leo has come from outer space and intends to track him down and dispose of him along with the rest of the humans. To start with, the advances made in makeup and costumes are very apparent in this version. Unlike in the original when it was distractingly obvious that the apes were people in costumes, this version almost makes you forget that. A lot of this comes from the excellent physical acting done by the likes of Roth, Carter, Michael Clarke Duncan, who plays Colonel Attar, and the countless extras. Unfortunately, Burton nearly ruins this effect by having the apes perform physical maneuvers and feats of strength that are almost comical. Another drawback is the 'human' actors. Wahlberg, Estella Warren, and Luke Eberl do a less than adequate job as the humans. Wahlberg obviously had the most difficult burden to bear in this film as he is the only one being compared to Charlton Heston. Unfortunately for Wahlberg, he fails miserably. Perhaps the burden of the role was too much for Wahlberg because he is usually a much better actor than he displays here. It was almost as if a cardboard cutout was standing in for him. But where this version of "Planet of the Apes" comes up the shortest against the original is in the ending. The original had one of the greatest endings in movie history that spoke volumes about nuclear technology. This version's ending is a bit perplexing, not only in what it is saying, but in how it possibly could have occurred. What I thought the ending was speaking about was the evils of slavery. If that is the case, then that is hardly an earth shattering revelation. The original "Planet of the Apes" was released in the late 60s before Three Mile Island and while nuclear weapons were providing defense for western civilization; so, it's conclusion was anything but conventional wisdom. All that being said though, Burton does create an entertaining action movie even if it doesn't live up to the social consciousness aspect of the original. That is one way in which this version exceeds the original. However, it is not close where it matters. P.S. The scene with Charlton Heston was almost physically painful to watch. I thought it was cool that they included him as an ape, but actually cringed when he said his final line (hint: it was the same final line from the original movie).
Rating:
Summary: instantly forgettable
Review: yet another film where for the first couple of minutes you think, hey this looks quite good, maybe its not as terrible as everyone says.
And then the plot descends to complete nonsense, and digs itself deeper and deeper into its own badly written grave.
theres almost nothing which redeems it, the fact it was up against a great classic orginal and fails in almost every department, or in fact all, says it all.
there were a few germs of good ideas, but the script was tosh, and most of the movie was ininvolving and laughable.
Rating:
Summary: Tim Burton Has Done Much Better efore.
Review: PLANET OF THE APES is a good DVD to have. Just for the extra features. However, the movie leaves a little to be desired overall. Mark Walhberg has done much better acting before. The most outstanding performance is Helena Boham Carter, David Warner and Tim Roth. They are some of the best apes I have ever scene. Even behind 3 pounds of facial make-up - they are wonderful. This movie does tribute to the original, but the original was much more entertaining for me. I am not a big Charlton Heston fan, but I must admit he did far better in the original. The story even has a twist I didn't like. The ending was changed. The original has a much more powerful revealing ending. Basically it is the same story, but the action and story focuses on the changing of history and alternate time-lines. They borrowed all of these concepts from Star Trek. There was a lot of originality here except a few performances. The DVD extras are the best I have seems which made this movie redeem itself on DVD. It has a lot of behind the scenes documentaries from teaching the extras how to be apes to costuming, sets, wardrobe and the detailing of the new make-up technologies that we have. The details and interviews and interviews are detailed and very interesting. There are music videos and a script-to-screen comparison for those script fans. The movie itself could have been better - but the DVD has a lot of DVD extras that make it worth while. (8-15-02)
Rating: 
Summary: Entertaining, but the ending makes no sense.
Review: I'll not recap the movie, as others here have done this. Suffice to say the flick was entertaining for the most part, but they so desparately wanted an ironic ending, they came up with one that follows no logical progression at all. To quote my lovely wife "The ending is stupid!"
Rating:
Summary: Planet of the Apes
Review: This moive is good for the most part but not at the end. I think at the end of the moive is stupid! That is why I rated 3 stars.
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