Rollerball

Rating:
Summary: A very insightful "Episode I" of the Rollerball Murders
Review: This remake could better be understood and appreciated if one looks at it as a "prequel" rather than a "remake". The original Rollerball is set in the far future in a 1984ish society, were as the "remake" is set only 3 years in the future (more or less it is happening right now), were the keystones of corporate society are just beginning to be set by globalization. And as you know in the "real world," two of the main players of globalization in the Middle East and Central Asia is the Red Mafia and Islamdom, which of coarse are dependent on Rollerball in the "remake" for their wealth. Yes, there are differences in the two versions. Rollerball in the "remake/prequel" is like most novelty sports (XFL, WWF, NWO, X-Games); the players are social rejects (criminals, psychotics, Goths, thrill seekers, or athletes from mainstream sports that play too rough), it is a coed sport (so much in this sport, that the leader of the Istanbul Hawks is a woman, despite representing an Islamic State: note continual footage of the woman with the sunglasses), heavy rock music being played, uniforms that represent individual personalities, it serves as a front for gambling and other criminal enterprises, and is (officially) non-lethal. Rollerball in the "original," is played by respected and law-abiding individuals, it is for men only, the music played is classical or at least contemporary classical, uniforms are well....uniformed, the sport replaces war as the chief vehicle of socially acceptable violence in an "One-Nation World", and there is no denying that the game's lethality is the whole point of the game! The key is you need to see where two movie overlap outside of having the same title. At the start of the film, you have Global leaders visiting Petrovich, with an interest in expanding this Islamo-Soviet sport ; are these people the founders of Energy Inc? The game, in the prequel, for the first time, changes its rules; in the original film, the Houston coach mentioned that the game has had numerous changes, but was still the same game (obviously two of those rule changes did away with female players and personalized outfits,). So is Jonathan E actually Jonathan Cross? Is Jonathan E.'s estranged wife Aurora? In a Special Edition Version of Jewison's Rollerball, will you have La Guillotine digitally added to Team New York (another rule change, no team nicknames), to add to the mayhem? Will Chopin and Stravinsky replace Rob Zombie and Pink as Rollerball musicians? Probably no, no, no, and yes. But could it be true that an unknown Pay-Per-View Sport becomes society's answer to it's ills 100 years from now, yes.

Rating:
Summary: A Confusing Waste of Plastic
Review: The movie has a vague plot, meaningless items, (like the facial tattoo), and a loud, annoying soundtrack which frequently overwhelms the dialog. The additional injection of non-english conversations, which it only translated occasionally, simply adds to the confusion. No real resemblence to either the novel or the original movie. I'd find 90 minutes of the Shopping Channel more entertaining.

Rating:
Summary: John McTiernan -- yet another casualty of MTV style.
Review: Several masters of action film have fallen prey to the undisciplined chaos of post-MTV, music-video-style editing and filmmaking. Tony Scott's Spy Game was one, but that film at least had the star power of Robert Redford and Brad Pitt to rescue it. Rollerball, on the other hand, has no redeeming features -- it is easily the worst film in John McTiernan's oeuvre.

Which is sad, because McTiernan's resume is an astonishing one: Predator, Die Hard, Die Hard with a Vengeance, The Hunt for Red October. Even his worst film up to now, Last Action Hero, was better than the mess that is Rollerball. From the beginning, it's clear that this film has no interest whatsoever in characterization and pacing. It simply thrusts you into sequence after sequence of undisciplined chaos. Who is main character Jonathan Cross? Who is his buddy? You still won't have a clue 30 minutes into the film, and that's about 20 minutes too late. Too much loud music, messy dialogue editing, use of pointless and ugly jump cuts, and hyperactive camera work conspire to make Rollerball an even bigger migraine than Swordfish...and that's saying a lot. Handheld camera is an overrated device indeed, and in the case of Rollerball, there are so many characters onscreen at a time that you'll find yourself desperately straining to figure out who's saying what, who is the focal point, and what exactly is going on. The overall feeling is that this film was shot in pure handheld-coverage style, the filmmakers simply mashing all the actors together in a location and then shooting endless amounts of film, without preplanning as to how it would all cut together. Call this modern filmmaking, but I'd take the razor-precision of Die Hard, Lethal Weapon and Top Gun any day.

Matched with the stylistic anarchy is a cast of characters who mostly behave like animals or clowns. There's not a single recognizable human trait in these characters; their motivations and behaviour are outlandishly cartoonish, without the entertaining factor.

What happened? I believe that action masters like McTiernan and Scott may have been led down this undesireable path by all the young Turks springing up from music-video backgrounds to do features. Unfortunately, as in the case of Rollerball, Swordfish, Gone in 60 Seconds, The Replacement Killers, this style is a true atrocity to action filmmaking. I hope Scott, McTiernan and others realize this and stick to their guns, or we can say goodbye to action movies.

Rating:
Summary: dont believe all the other reviews
Review: this is the coolest movie ever made . it's fun and has lots of action. my favorite scene was when rebecca - romajin - stamos was naked. i think shes a very hot actress and she needs to be in more movies. this was perfect and i loved the soundtrack also. i mean i love the song never going to stop me by rob zombie. rent it turn on your system and watch this for the 1 hour and a half it lasts and you will be pleased. it's kinda funny too. i mean the end what she says to chris klein.

Rating:
Summary: Never remake a good movie
Review: My goodness, talk about weak. Take a cool movie, about a good game, then overkill the game, introduce glam music,[dumb]costumes, [bad] acting, and over-explaining what we can plainly descern, and badabing you have this wretch.

Ever listen to a child tell a joke, then after they deliver the punchline, they ask "Did you get it?", then start explaining the punchline like you were younger than them? If you've seen the original, you know about the oh-so-scary conspiracy to use the game for politics, and that there should be no heros. Well this time you have a play-by-play analyst and, well pretty much everyone in the movie explaining what's going on, in case you fell asleep.

The original Rollerball course was way easier to get, and far more plausable - it even spawned that dumb roller-gladiator junk in the 80's.. Well this course was absolutely STUPID, and oh did I mention how weak the acting is? Dude who plays the lead here was the one who wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend in "American Pie". Well he is incapable of looking another actor in the eyes, in case he forgets his lines. LL Cool J, he was the ONLY decent actor in this movie. Even Jean Reno ("Leon, the Professional") was a bit hammy here, but I guess it's his role (about as overcooked as Richard Dawson's role was in Running Man).

Only "surprise", I go ahead and spoil it, as you should thank me for saving you the money - hmm... ok, think combination of "Death Race 2000" ending, with the ending from "Tommy" (the Who opera). Bleaaaaarrrrrggghhhhh........ !!!

There is only one Jonathan in Rollerball - Jonathon E. Buy or rent the original - maturer acting, better music, and a subtler screenplay.

...

Rating:
Summary: What's a turkey look like on skates?
Review: For years, the noted critic Roger Ebert has advised filmmakers to stop remaking great movies and to concentrate instead on revamping failures. It's a beautiful theory, but you can't prove it by "Rollerball," director John McTiernan's remake of the 1975 thriller about one player's struggle to topple the evil businessmen promoting an ultraviolent sport involving high-speed skating, motorcycles and sometimes fatal clashes between teams. The original, which starred James Caan, was a mostly dull piece of sci-fi that's notable today only for its accurate depiction of a future in which corporate influence has seeped into nearly every aspect of daily life. The new version is a nearly incomprehensible hodgepodge of mashed-together scenes and miserable performances. If it were any more of a turkey, it would gobble in Dolby Digital stereo. If nothing else, "Rollerball" 2002 may go down in cinema history as the only movie ever in which the rest of the cast was outshined by LL Cool J. Strapping on Caan's skates in the role of star Rollerballer Jonathan Cross is Chris Klein, who is always far more appealing as a comedian ("Election," the "American Pie" films) than he is a dramatic actor. He's hopelessly -- sometimes hilariously -- out of his element here, reading his lines as if he learned them phonetically. Most of the time, Klein seems like Keanu Reeves without the depth. The plot, such as it is, takes Cross to Central Asia, where he joins his old friend Marcus (LL Cool J) in the popular televised Rollerball tournaments, which Cross once dismissed as "a circus, not a sport." Although Cross becomes a celebrity, he gets a trifle suspicious when the games are plagued by "accidents" that send some participants to the hospital and others to the graveyard. "Just close your eyes and take the money," Marcus pleads, a thought that might have become the mantra of the makers of "Rollerball" as they watched their project go down the drain. But Cross, who turns out to be the most astonishingly naive and trusting superstar in modern history, instead whines to Petrovich (Jean Reno), the madman who calls the shots in the Rollerball world. Petrovich, of course, soothes Cross' fears -- then turns around and targets Cross' teammate and secret lover Aurora (Rebecca Romijn-Stamos) as his next victim. McTiernan is the director who gave us such blockbusters as the original "Die Hard" and "The Hunt for Red October," so why he chose to preside over this fiasco is anyone's guess. Even the action scenes, which should have been a breeze for him, are irritatingly chopped up and obviously trimmed to fit the parameters of the PG-13 rating. A long stretch of the movie is shot, for no apparent reason, through a night-vision lens, which makes everything pale green and fuzzy: It looks more like a processing lab mistake than a stylistic choice. When "Rollerball" isn't assaulting the eye, it's trying to provoke an earache, courtesy of Eric Serra's cut-rate heavy metal score and Reno's shouted dialogue, large portions of which are impossible to decipher. The first "Rollerball" was mediocrity with a message. This one offers $80 million worth of sheer incompetence, both on the screen and behind the camera.

Rating:
Summary: SO BAD, ITS GOOD!!
Review: I saw this movie originally in one of those cheap theaters where all the semi-old movies go. I don't think there was a dry eye in the house, everyone was laughing their collective [rears] off at this movie's horrible editing and lack of...well...movie. Let's start off -- any movie with LL Cool J (with the exception of Any Given Sunday) automatically sucks. Add to that Chris Klein (who was decent in American Pie and excellent in Election), who just isn't cut out for action roles. Instead of droning on, I'm going to list the best parts of the movie:

(1) Infamous night vision scene where LL and Klein are being chased around by evil dudes, for NO APPARENT REASON. Looks like it's being filmed on VHS. All of a sudden they drive through a barb wire fence and the "BOOOIIINNNGG" sound effect (like in old cartoons) is played. This was the highlight of the movie.

(2) Amazing editing, where someone will be turning their head or walking, and then all of a sudden appear somewhere else. rock and roll!

(3) Pink's "Acting Debut"...except for the fact that she only appeared on a tv in the background of one scene for one second, lip synching to a song that wasn't even hers...I think it was a Rob Zombie song or something

(4) Rebecca Romajin Stamos: her fake ...russian accent is hilarious, as is her scene where she's lifting weights topless, FOR NO REASON. apparently chicks do that all the time. Also, her final line in the movie is classic. I won't spoil it for you.

In summary, check out this movie...I haven't watched the DVD version yet but if it's unchanged from it's theatrical counterpart, then you're in for an excellent unintentional comedy. I can't wait to see the deleted scenes in this movie...if they [were] even WORSE than the actual movie itself, then I won't know what to do with myself. This is one of those movies where it's so bad that it's entertaining (like Fast and the Furious, only worse!)

Rating:
Summary: Rollerball
Review: I personally think that this was a good movie because it has action and thrill.

Rating:
Summary: 'Roll' this One Straight to the Dumpyard
Review: I hate this movie. It's one of the worst things I have ever seen. I guess they couldn't afford good lighting because of the nightvision scene. Terrible. I thought I was watching some secret covert operation with Chris Klein and LL Cool J riding on a motorcycle. Talk about trash, the camera work is so bad, you never know what is going on and why care? "Rollerball" is the most popular 'sport' in the world and they go in circles on rollerblades and motorcycles. Talk about excitement. You would think director John McTiernan who made "Die Hard" and "Predator," both excellent movies, would entertain, but no. It was funny though how Pink made a three second appearance and got billed for it. Jean Reno a.k.a. "The Professional" should be ashamed of himself and watch for Slipknot's performance. Nobody did as fans of the 'sport' walked right by them without giving them a glance. It was funny. I highly suggest that when you see this DVD at the store, just make a cross and hiss. It's truly evil. Avoid at all costs.

Rating:
Summary: What went wrong with this film?!
Review: This film was a major disappointment. I expected so much more from the director of freaking "Die Hard". The direction, acting, and writing were all a joke. This film left you with the feeling that it was all just thrown together, and no one took it that seriously. There were lots of things in this film that just didn't make any sense at all. Someone explain: Why was that desert chase scene filmed in night vision? WHAT IN THE HECK WAS UP WITH THAT?! The editing was choppy and scenes were just thrown together. I gave this film two stars for one reason: The skateboarding scene at the beggining was sorta cool. Thats about it.

SKIP IT. "Rollerball" is a loser.