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Blue Juice

Blue Juice

List Price: $9.98
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Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Truely British
Review: I was forced to write this review to express my anger at the person who claims this film is Australian. How stupid! Catherine Zeta Jones is Welsh. Sean Pertwee is English and the whole film is set in Cornwall. The best bit involves his mate sprayed silver all over for a dance rave where he really gets his chance to stop worrying about life! A must see film with a great soundtrack which sadly I can't get hold of.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Eh, it's something to do
Review: I was surprised when I watched this film because Ewan and Catherine are clearly 5-7 years younger in it than they appear on the cover. This is a British film that stars some guy I've seen in other obscure movies with Catherine and Ewan as B-characters. Something was weird with Catherine, she had no eye makeup or something, it was quite distracting. Ewan was cool, and played a familiar stereotype he has perfected, the druggy loser. I didn't quite understand the tone of the picture. I thought it was going to be a romantic adventure film, Point Break with kissing. Not even close. It seems like it wants to be a beach movie, but the jokes are few and far between, not to mention not funny. Some go by so fast that, because of the dialect, are practically indecipherable. For a surf movie, there is surprisingly little surfing, and I found myself fast-forwarding through a lot of babbling (a staple of British filmmaking). We are treated to one final shot of someone riding a huge wave. Don't blink or you'll miss it. Like I say in the heading, it's something to kill time with, but very forgettable.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: No dude, the surf is NOT up
Review: I've never been much for surfing movies. Only 2 reasons why I picked up this aqua-attempt @ a movie:

(1) It stars Catherine Zeta-Jones
(2) It was under [money]

Unfortunately, I regretted my decision to purchase it. The plot centers around an over-the-hill past-his-prime surfer (Sean Pertwee - NOT the fellow on the cover) who feels it incumbent that he surf a dangerous coral & rock infested area known as "the boneyard." Why? you ask. Well, so he can land a good-for-nothing friend of his a job @ a 2nd-rate newspaper. Contrived, you say? Yep, you're right! Of course, being that this is a surf film, they elevate the task to the stature of Hektor travelling outside the gates to protect his beloved city of Troy.

The only other surf movie I recall seeing is POINT BREAK. Two factors make BLUE JUICE a better movie than POINT BREAK:

(1) POINT BREAK included Keanu Reeves in its cast, BLUE JUICE did not.
(2) BLUE JUICE included Catherine Zeta-Jones in its cast. POINT BREAK did not.

Furthermore, there are only 2 factors that entice one to watch BLUE JUICE @ all:

(1) Catherine Zeta-Jones looks terrific in a bikini.
(2) Catherine Zeta-Jones looks terrific in lingerie.

Other than that, this film is a wash. There is one scene in which one of the main characters is getting pummeled by 3-4 guys. Ostensibly, we're supposed to have sympathy for him. Actually, the fellow was so obnoxious that I was rooting for the lads who were belting him.

Even Cahterine Zeta-Jones fans will have a hard time stomaching this DVD. In truth, she is only in about 15% of the story. The rest of the film details 4 guys meandering around the English countryside doing asinine things. Likewise, fans of surf movies probably won't get too much out of this film, either. There's only about maybe 7 minutes of surfing in the entire disc, and none of IT is particularly exciting.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: No dude, the surf is NOT up
Review: I've never been much for surfing movies. Only 2 reasons why I picked up this aqua-attempt @ a movie:

(1) It stars Catherine Zeta-Jones
(2) It was under [money]

Unfortunately, I regretted my decision to purchase it. The plot centers around an over-the-hill past-his-prime surfer (Sean Pertwee - NOT the fellow on the cover) who feels it incumbent that he surf a dangerous coral & rock infested area known as "the boneyard." Why? you ask. Well, so he can land a good-for-nothing friend of his a job @ a 2nd-rate newspaper. Contrived, you say? Yep, you're right! Of course, being that this is a surf film, they elevate the task to the stature of Hektor travelling outside the gates to protect his beloved city of Troy.

The only other surf movie I recall seeing is POINT BREAK. Two factors make BLUE JUICE a better movie than POINT BREAK:

(1) POINT BREAK included Keanu Reeves in its cast, BLUE JUICE did not.
(2) BLUE JUICE included Catherine Zeta-Jones in its cast. POINT BREAK did not.

Furthermore, there are only 2 factors that entice one to watch BLUE JUICE @ all:

(1) Catherine Zeta-Jones looks terrific in a bikini.
(2) Catherine Zeta-Jones looks terrific in lingerie.

Other than that, this film is a wash. There is one scene in which one of the main characters is getting pummeled by 3-4 guys. Ostensibly, we're supposed to have sympathy for him. Actually, the fellow was so obnoxious that I was rooting for the lads who were belting him.

Even Cahterine Zeta-Jones fans will have a hard time stomaching this DVD. In truth, she is only in about 15% of the story. The rest of the film details 4 guys meandering around the English countryside doing asinine things. Likewise, fans of surf movies probably won't get too much out of this film, either. There's only about maybe 7 minutes of surfing in the entire disc, and none of IT is particularly exciting.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Blue Juice the reivew
Review: In one part of the moive I think you sould look away on that one. Trush me. The legend is here it's JC (Sean Pertwee). In the moive he has the look's and fame and he has it all: And he has the hottest girl in town her name is Chloe (Catherine Zeta Jones). Ok one of his friend's (Ewan McGregor) enter him in a dangerous surfing contest, poor JC he must risk his life or his one ture love.

Which one is it going to be? The girl or the contest???

In the moive he said he is out of shape and he can't surf like that anymore. In the moive he said he almost die form that foolishly stuff. Once he had it all but now I don't know about that one.

Well, enjoy the moive I did you will too!!!!!

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: A Beach Bummer
Review: The only thing worse than surfers without any waves is a film about surfers without any waves. For viewers who love surfing this film will be a gigantic disappointment since the total number of minutes of surfing footage struggles to reach three.

The story is a slice of life about beached surfers who are waiting not for the perfect wave, but for any wave at all. J.C. (Sean Pertwee) is an aging super surfer who is flirting with a commitment with his girlfriend Chloe (Catherine Zeta Jones). Just as he is about to find grown up bliss with the woman he loves, three old surfing friends turn up and convince him to hit the beach looking for monster waves at the Bone Yard. The trouble is, there are no waves until the very end of the film, so most of the story dissipates itself on a meandering succession of disconnected beach happenings.

The acting is mostly mediocre. Sean Pertwee has a few comical moments, but his acting was generally mundane. Ewan McGregor was decent as the drug dealing wild man, by far the most interesting and peculiar character of the bunch. Probably the funniest performance was turned in by Peter Gunn as Terry who turned his corpulent body into a continual sight gag. Catherine Zeta-Jones was sexy as usual, but her character didn't really have enough meat for her to show much acting ability.

There is really not much here on which to comment. I rated it a 3/10. It's a real beach bummer.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Good no-brainer
Review: This is a great cute movie if you don't want to have to think too hard. Some classic funny lines, really goofy characters.

JC (Sean Pertwee) must prove his worth as a surfer (in England!) where surfing barely exists. Kind of a cute twist on the surfer movies: it's cold and there's really no waves to speak of. But once in a blue moon, these huge waves come in and that is when JC must prove himself.

BUT... his girlfriend (Cahterine Zeta-Jones) will disown him if he even tries! So, here lies the issue. Does he pronounce his love and forget the stupid wave, or is he influenced by his childhood friends who care nothing for intimate relationships?

Unrealistic, sure. Of course. But cute.

Plot is thin, but the characters are memorable and there are some truly classic funny lines. JC's childhood friends (Ewan McGregor, Peter Gunn and Steven Mackintosh) are hilarious characters and are all portrayed very well. Definitely worth the rental price, or buy it used.

A couple things I don't understand:

WHY ON EARTH IS THE PRICE SO HIGH!?!?! What's up with that? But it used.

WHY is Ewan McGregor on the front cover, as if he is the main character? Yes, he plays a pivotal character - JC actually forsakes his love to save Dean's pride and his life. But shouldn't Sean Pertwee be the one on the cover with Catherine Zeta-Jones? As cute as McGregor is, he never looks this clean-cut (or sane) in the movie!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: It's on the same level as "Airborne"
Review: this isn't a great movie, but if you're a fan of bad movies a la "gleaming the cube," "airborne," and the like, you'll dig it. it's impossible not to appreciate some of the humor. it's not clever, but it's not supposed to be. i laugh every time i see this movie.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: It's on the same level as "Airborne"
Review: this isn't a great movie, but if you're a fan of bad movies a la "gleaming the cube," "airborne," and the like, you'll dig it. it's impossible not to appreciate some of the humor. it's not clever, but it's not supposed to be. i laugh every time i see this movie.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Catherine Zeta-Jones before she was famous
Review: This movie is a must-see for you Catherine Zeta-Jones fans. She is beautiful, sexy, and young in this movie. She also speaks with her natural enlish accent. As far as the movie, it is a romantic comedy about a lad who is torn between being a responsible young man who puts Chloe (catherine zeta-jones) first in his life, or a young lad who wants to still to be looked up to by his buddies by going along with their dares and adventures surfing. The movie is cute, funny in moments, and has a nice ending.


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