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Jail Bait

Jail Bait

List Price: $24.99
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Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Truly "Edwoodian." So Bad it's good
Review: Folks, leave your brains at the door. This is good old Edwoodian schlock about a bad boy who gets mixed up with the wrong crowd. Laugh out loud at the outragous stupidity and unintentioned humor of horrible dialougue, bad acting , and sheer senselessness. Who the heck would insist that a doctor under pressure of gunpoint operate on him? (That's just for starters). The surprise ending (which I won't reveal here) is pretty good. But the Blackface minstrel performance as an abomination not only for modern P.C. reasons (as an African-American myself, I've seen far worse in old movies), but it is not funny at all (the guy in Blackface whines and strains his voice in a gross effort to sound "Black" and the gags consist of very bad puns). In true Edwoodian style, it has nothing whatsoever to do with the story. But if you and your friends are filled with beers and pizza and want a good howl for over an hour, then this is for you.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Fine DVD transfer of overlooked Ed Wood crime thriller
Review: Jail Bait, shot by Wood in between Glen or Glenda and Bride of the Monster, is perhaps the least-known and -loved of his 1950s features, probably because it's more competently produced and slower paced than his more notorious films. The misleading title (referring to a handgun, not an underage girl) may lead to disappointment for the first-time viewer expecting sleazier fare. And Jail Bait just doesn't exhibit the unbridled lunacy and delirious verve of Plan 9 and Glen or Glenda, although there's plenty of Ed's mind-numbing, circular dialogue and a handful of ludicrous plot points for the seasoned Woodophile to savor. The cast features Hollywood veterans Lyle Talbot and Herbert Rawlinson (who died of lung cancer during production), Wood's then-girlfriend Dolores Fuller (later composer of a number of Elvis tunes), newcomer Steve (Hercules) Reeves, perennial sleazemeister Timothy Farrell (Gun Girls, Devil's Sleep, Girl Gang, Racket Girls), Vogue model (and Jack Paar's sexy weathergirl) Theodora Thurman, and apparent nonactor 'Clancy Malone' (actually Scott McCloud, Glen or Glenda's unit director). It's fun to track the conflicting acting styles (and competencies): former silent star Rawlinson (as Dr. Gregor) out-acts the bunch; Fuller is stiff as a board; Farrell and Thurman chew the scenery voraciously; Steve Reeves personifies the 'dumb hunk' (watch him attempt to run lines with Talbot while putting on a coat and tie); and Malone just tries to act his way out of a paper bag. The plot is essentially the story of a jerk (Farrell) and an idiot (Malone) who go on the lam after shooting a cop while robbing a beauty parlor (!?). Logical lapses abound (e.g. Malone's father hides him from the cops, then lets him go if he promises to turn himself in later; Farrell's moll [Thurman] is hopelessly loyal even though he constantly treats her like dirt). It all finishes with a hilarious "twist" ending involving plastic surgery. Bad Film fanatics will love to cringe at the irritating piano-and-guitar score (recycled from Mesa of Lost Women) by Hoyt Curtin (who wrote the Jetsons theme and scored all the major Hanna-Barbera cartoon series) and the embarrassing minstrel show sequence, which in true Woodian fashion is inserted into the movie for no apparent reason whatsoever. While Jail Bait never reaches the dizzying heights/depths of Wood's more famous films, there's enough chaff to be found amongst the wheat to satisfy trash film junkies with the patience to dig a little.
Image's DVD, part of their Wade Williams Collection, is as fine a presentation of the movie as you're likely to see. Although there is some light speckling and blemishing (mostly around reel changes), the source print exhibits overall excellent brightness, contrast, and shadow/highlight detail. The picture is very crisp, at times revealing some fine grain in the source material. The Dolby 1.0 sound is clear, although the level seems a bit soft. Eleven chapter stops and a slightly washed out Jail Bait trailer (also suffering from some speckling, blemishing, and vertical scratching) are included. A minimal but very fine package; perhaps a bit pricey for some considering the few extras, but nonetheless essential viewing for serious aficionados of Ed Wood or cheap, trashy movies in general.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: THIS MOVIE SUCKED! i liked it
Review: Ok, this movie is awful and it has a misleading title, but would you expect anything else from Ed Wood? The DVD has clear picture, and the sound is pretty good, if a little quiet. There are no real extras, besides the trailer, but this is probably the best presentation of the film out there, which makes it a must own for hardcore Wood fans.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: THIS MOVIE SUCKED! i liked it
Review: This movie is not good/bad; it's just plain bad. "Jailbait," as a term, which normally means an underage girl, here means a handgun possessed by a parolee! This film has none of the charm of Plan Nine or even Bride of the Monster. It's just bad. It looks like amateur home movies of a community theater rehearsal. Unless you are committed to seeing every Ed Wood travesty, this one you should probably pass up. It's a stinker.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Jailbait is Not What You Think
Review: This movie is not good/bad; it's just plain bad. "Jailbait," as a term, which normally means an underage girl, here means a handgun possessed by a parolee! This film has none of the charm of Plan Nine or even Bride of the Monster. It's just bad. It looks like amateur home movies of a community theater rehearsal. Unless you are committed to seeing every Ed Wood travesty, this one you should probably pass up. It's a stinker.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Jail Bait Lures Laughs
Review: This unintentional film-noir spoof has all the marks of Ed Wood's zany script and direction. In other words, it's absolutely hilarious! There's nothing basically preposterous about a plastic surgeon deconstructing a face, yet Wood managed to make this movie a farce--even though he obviously tried to produce a straight-up crime drama. The only competent actor involved, Lyle Talbot, moves stolidly through the story, tossing off the dumbest dialogue with professionalism and aplomb. His sidekick, Steve Reeves, however, flips off his lines as though each word were a fleck of dandruff to be brushed hastily and unobtrusively away. Wood's non-actor girlfriend, Dolores Fuller, looks like a blonde bombshell trussed up in business suits as she strides martially back and forth in her living room. The movie is a windfall of loony lines, cheap props, and ridiculous situations. A purportedly luxurious apartment is so cheaply and sparingly furnished that it looks one notch above a flophouse. Surgery is performed on the couch of a gangster's moll, and then she attends the bandage removal in a fur and cocktail gown. A corpse is propped, standing up, in a shallow closet, prompting the moll to rail about dead men cluttering up her place. As far as so-bad-it's-good flicks go, this one's so terrible it's terrific!

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Not as "bad" as Wood's classics, but a must for collectors
Review: Written by the one and only Edward D. Wood Jr in collaboration with Alex Gordon. JAIL BAIT concerns Don Gregor (Lyle Talbot) a criminal whose father (who just happens to be a plastic surgeon) wants him to straighten out and start a new life; and yes that includes getting a new face.
That's the basic "plot". The more "serious" approach to this movie means it isn't as fun as say, NIGHT OF THE GHOULS; but JAIL BAIT is still a worthwhile addition to the collections of cult movie afficionados. But the feature itself is weak, flat and poorly paced, even by Wood's rock bottom standards.
So why doesn't JAIL BAIT rank as one of Ed's "classics"? Because:
a)The story is more conventional.
b)The film's direction is almost COMPETENT. If you viewed this without knowing Wood directed, you could be forgiven for easily dismissing JAIL BAIT as a forgettably bad B crime melodrama and:
c)Bela Lugosi, Tor Johnson or Criswell are nowhere to be seen.
Despite this; I've given the movie 2 stars simply because it's difficult to completely dislike an Ed Wood movie, no matter how much you may wish to. The DVD is also worth a look since this edition of JAIL BAIT is the digitally remastered Director's Cut. So that's got to be worth something. The movie is also notable for Wood's casting of a pre- HERCULES Steve Reeves, using his own voice for once.
Last of all, I have a question: Is it just me, or did this inadvertently inspire the movie JOHNNY HANDSOME, which featured Mickey Rourke at his most mumbling and incoherant? Try comparing the movies sometime and you may see a few parallels between the two.


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